Comic Transcripts

[[JORDAN creeps up on his father, who is asleep in a chair. Jordan holds a thin stick.]]
JORDAN: …The crowd holds their collective breath.
Now, after four agonizing hours, the world record is within reach!
Can he do it? Can he top the performance of China’s Xiao Fei Shin at last year’s international championships?

JORDAN: He’s taking his stance for the lunge.
In five seconds, Jordan Carruthers will either be THE NEW WORLD CHAMPION of driving sticks into sleeping fathers’ ears, or GROUNDED FOR LIFE.

[[Outside the study, JORDAN’S SISTER listens at the door.]]
FATHER: AAAHHHHHHH
SISTER (thinks): At this rate I won’t even make it to the semis!

{{Header: do your best at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{Alt-text: those chinese kids train from birth, man, from BIRTH}}

#430; In which Jordan excels at Sport transcribed by in

[[JORDAN creeps up on his father, who is asleep in a chair. Jordan holds a thin stick.]]
JORDAN: …The crowd holds their collective breath.
Now, after four agonizing hours, the world record is within reach!
Can he do it? Can he top the performance of China’s Xiao Fei Shin at last year’s international championships?

JORDAN: He’s taking his stance for the lunge.
In five seconds, Jordan Carruthers will either be THE NEW WORLD CHAMPION of driving sticks into sleeping fathers’ ears, or GROUNDED FOR LIFE.

[[Outside the study, JORDAN’S SISTER listens at the door.]]
FATHER: AAAHHHHHHH
SISTER (thinks): At this rate I won’t even make it to the semis!

{{Header: do your best at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{Alt-text: those chinese kids train from birth, man, from BIRTH}}

#430; In which Jordan excels at Sport transcribed by in

[[JORDAN creeps up on his father, who is asleep in a chair. Jordan holds a thin stick.]]
JORDAN: ...The crowd holds their collective breath.
Now, after four agonizing hours, the world record is within reach!
Can he do it? Can he top the performance of China's Xiao Fei Shin at last year's international championships?

JORDAN: He's taking his stance for the lunge.
In five seconds, Jordan Carruthers will either be THE NEW WORLD CHAMPION of driving sticks into sleeping fathers' ears, or GROUNDED FOR LIFE.

[[Outside the study, JORDAN'S SISTER listens at the door.]]
FATHER: AAAHHHHHHH
SISTER (thinks): At this rate I won't even make it to the semis!

{{Header: do your best at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{Alt-text: those chinese kids train from birth, man, from BIRTH}}

those chinese kids train from birth, man, from BIRTH

#430; In which Jordan excels at Sport

  — August 1st, 2008

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Applications open for Genius Northwest – an IRL gaming competition

May 8, 2026 by David Malki !

Last year, I participated in Genius Northwest, a gaming competition inspired by the Korean gameshow The Genius and its ilk.

It’s a reality show without the cameras — a 3-day, all-inclusive weekend retreat structured around a series of challenges and puzzles, in which personalities and dealmaking matter as much as playing games.

It’s truly a remarkable thing. I came in dead last in the competition, but I still had a great time participating.

The event is held annually in the Pacific Northwest (hence the name) and applications are now open to participate in the 2026 competition!

Learn more — and apply — at GeniusNW.com.


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