“Emperor” Sweepstakes RESULTS

Thanks to everyone who picked up a copy of Emperor of the Food Chain during the sweepstakes entry period! Time to award some GREAT PRIZES.

METHODOLOGY: Everyone who sent in a valid entry form, whether online or in the mail, had the chance to specify which drawing(s) to be entered into. Their entry (or entries) are entered into each drawing separately — so if someone had two entries, and chose two drawings, they got two entries in each drawing.

I then assigned each entry in each drawing a unique number, and used a random number generator from random.org to pick the winners. So without futher ado…

– ART COLLECTOR PRIZE –

The one-of-a-kind signed and framed Piranhamoose print, featuring the fearsome skeleton of the beast on display in a museum of horrors, is awarded to…

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Last Few Days for Artist Editions; Shirts on Clearance

Here are some more Artist Edition book drawings I did earlier this week! This Sunday, the 30th, is the last day to pick up one of your own. (They won’t be available again before the holidays, so, you know. Think ahead.) UPDATE: They’re done! Thanks, everyone!

Here’s a ROCKET + BEAR:

COWBOY + ELEPHANT + BOXING:

SHARK + CACTUS + TANK:

Hee hee, VICTORIAN + ROBOT + BATMAN:

For this final week I’ve changed up the Roll-a-Sketch options, and Marksman George C. has updated his randomizer script accordingly! Thanks, George!

Also, a note about the strange sweepstakes: I’ve gotten a few reports that the submission form is occasionally buggy. I haven’t been able to reproduce the error myself, but if you encounter any problems, just email me the same info from the form (dave at wondermark dot com). The deadline for all submissions is Sunday, September 30. UPDATE: Also done!

This is also a good time to mention that TopatoCo has just put some of my shirts on clearance for only $12:

Steam Powered Heart

Trailer Shirts – All Audiences and Restricted Audiences

International Fraternal Corps of Bears In Ill-Fitting Hats

PLUS the three-shirt-discount (five bucks off when you get any three shirts on the entire site) still applies, PLUS TopatoCo has a new program where you can submit a photo and get a $10 gift certificate!

It’s like…I dunno, guys. It just might be an amazing time to be alive.

Celebrating Oktoberfesterdämmerung

I hope your Oktoberfesterdämmerung is going — ah, not well, exactly, because that would be beside the point, but tolerably.

Oktoberfesterdämmerung is, of course, on our list of new holidays for 2012. It’s a multi-week-long — well, not celebration exactly, more like acknowledgement that life has its gray moments, that beer and sausages are nice during the day, but that the night has its place as well.

Oktoberfesterdämmerung began in 1811, when Reinhold Cornhold, a minor duke of the Lesser Prussian Lowlands, drank a beer and ate a sausage and just sat on his minor estate watching the sun go down behind a forested mountain. “Huh,” he thought, in Lesser Prussian. “One hundred years from now, nobody will remember the cow I punched this morning for not yielding milk, nor how profusely I apologized to it. Two hundred years from now, this building where I am sitting might be a quarry, or a battlefield, or a space station, or a peanut factory. Three hundred years from now, my name will have faded from the lips of every man, woman, and child on the planet. Unless I do something now.”

Thus started the Prussian tradition of punching cows and apologizing to them, and then drinking some milk, and then later that day drinking beer and eating a sausage in the dark, citing Reinhold Cornhold’s name as the reason for it all. At first only Reinhold’s household observed the tradition — at his fierce insistence — but later, as the minor duke divorced* and married and divorced and married more and more equally-minor duchesses from the surrounding clandoms, the custom spread.

Unsurprisingly, cows eventually learned to avoid the Lesser Prussian Lowlands, and the territory was conquered by the French in 1848 thanks to the brittle bones of the undercalciumed Prussian army. Later, Reinhold Cornhold’s estate was bulldozed to build an Aldi supermarket.

*Can’t imagine why anyone would divorce such a charming fellow.

So, this Oktoberfesterdämmerung, have a beer, a sausage, a hearty nighttime-think, and a cow-punch (with apology) on me! And when you do, think of Reinhold Cornhold. He may have been fictional, but he gave us something all too real: RC Cola, which bears his initials to this day.


Obligatory reminder: Sunday, September 30 will be the last day to order Artist Editions of my new book!

Also, TopatoCo has just placed tons of older shirt designs on clearance, including a couple of mine! UPDATE: and this one too!