Wondermark

Some Animals From the Wondermark Calendar

June 29, 2023December 16, 2015

As I described earlier this week, this year’s edition of the Wondermark Calendar (Update: which is now sold out!) chronicles the famous around-the-world journey of Dr. Priscilla Dustbin. Here, in her own words (from the calendar’s introductory page), is her rationale for setting out on this expedition of discovery…

'tis she

It has always seemed to me that all things deserve names, and good names at that. Not Latin or Greek jaw-smashers that no person could ever say, but proper names, like Dennis or Keith or Isabella. The difference between a wild animal and a pet is simply a name, for the things we name, we come to love. I wish to love all things. So I will give them all the names they deserve, if they have none of their own.

I have booked passage on a steamer leaving Port Georgina and am bringing only my pencils, papers, and thirst for travel. Kinross at the doggery has given me a letter of introduction to a cousin of hers in Piraeus; from there, my wits will be my guide. This world is far too large for everything to have been seen, and even of those things seen, not all have yet been named. I do not know what I will find on this voyage, but already I have heard rumors of fierce-eyed beasts, lying in wait in dark jungles no person can penetrate, ready to rend me limb from limb—with flashing claws and dreadful teeth—in a ruddy instant.

See how my pen trembles here…I can barely write from the excitement! What wonders I will see…!

Each dated page of the calendar (there are 27 of them in all) recounts an anecdote from the good doctor’s journey. Whenever she encountered an unusual animal, she would illustrate it, and give it a name, as you can see:

In this way, you can follow along with her throughout the year, exploring the strange corners of the world at her side, and learning all about the curious beasts she came across on the way.

The trip takes her from Europe to North Africa; from the Middle East to the frozen Northlands; across all the various Americas; and drops in on uncharted islands in between.

I love reading travelogues, and after years of structuring the calendar as a string of disconnected goofs, I thought it would be fun to try to tell a (wee bit of a) continuous story all through the year. So this calendar does so — very loosely, I should say. (It is still replete with disconnected goofs.)

I also had a lot of fun making the animals for this calendar! I even got carried away and made too many, and had to choose which to include. So rest assured you are getting the ALL-STARS of Team Curious Animal.

I’m really proud of this year’s calendar and I hope you’ll like it too! As always, it sits on your desk in a handsome wooden backboard (optionally included — or, feel free to save a few bucks and reuse your board from a previous year!)

And, of course, this year for the FIRST TIME we are including commemorative plaques — in the form of our new Wondermark Cast Cards — free with every calendar.

YES FOR EVERYONE ONLY FOR ACES

~~As I write, there are only 37 calendars still unclaimed from our limited run! You can order yours RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW. They will be shipping THIS VERY WEEK!~~ Update: They are ALL GONE!

Final week for the store!

June 29, 2023December 14, 2015

As the year’s end approaches, I should let you know that my in-house store, offering greeting cards and calendars, will close for the season after this Friday, the 18th! All orders made up through Friday will ship this week. After that, it’s January, baby. UPDATE: We have now closed for the season!

(Note that I cannot control the speed of the post office, so at this point in the month, I can make no guarantees about Christmas delivery. I think it may be likely, depending on when you order and where you live, but all we can do is our very best.)

My books, apparel, &c. at TopatoCo are also shipping now! TopatoCo has their own set of holiday deadlines which are a bit more restrictive. I recommend taking a look over there, as there are lots of fun things!

LIKE THESE THINGS:

Just, you know, as an example.

TopatoCo also has a pop-up shop this year, at their Easthampton, Massachusetts headquarters! I believe they are offering local pickup of online orders there, so that is cool and new.

Here is more about our calendar, as well! I’ve talked about its name and the stuff you can get with it. Here is more about the thing, itself!

Every year since December 2007 I’ve made a limited-edition Wondermark calendar. For the past five years, it’s been a progressive calendar, which means there are no gaps between months! This is an objectively more useful way to experience a calendar, as it is the way we experience real life.

In order to ensure that you can always see dates at least two weeks ahead (no matter where you are in the month), each calendar card is fortnightly rather than monthly. In other words, each card shows two weeks.

This also means that, rather than twelve pieces of art or photos or whatever like a monthly calendar might have, our calendar includes thirty new pieces of Wondermark art. WHAT VALUE!

Each year’s calendar is themed! This year, it relates the famous tale of Dr. Priscilla Dustbin, with each page displaying another of the strange creatures she encountered on her storied voyage around the world.

Here is a bit of background on Dr. Priscilla Dustbin, from the calendar’s introductory page:

Little is known about Priscilla Dustbin before the launch of her famous odyssey. Born in Spanner-upon-Dredge to a carpentrix and a lorry pranger, she earned her doctorate by post while working in a dog factory, where she discovered and named six new types of dog, most of which had been concealed under some old blankets.

Soon, her heart broken by a fellow dogworker and her taste exhausted for things familiar, she set off on an expedition to the world’s wildlands, where she keenly observed, and sketched from life or memory, many curious creatures unknown at that time to Science.

Sadly, the day of her return, her valise was lost in a canal with all her letters inside. From that day till her death six decades later, she insisted it would be ‘a right bother’ to re-transcribe any of her recollections…

This year, a partial manuscript was found by chance in the Bodleian library, mislabeled as a Hungarian dictionary. Historians can now marvel at this chronicle of the wilds as they once were, long ago.

Here, in print for the first time, is what remains of the diaries she kept, the drawings she made, and the names she gave to the wonders she discovered on that journey.

It’s quite a rousing tale, and it takes a full year to unfold. It will be your constant, stalwart companion in the weeks and months to come.

I only print a limited number of these calendars every year; each copy is signed and numbered by me. I will show you more of the creatures inside over the next few days.

For now, I will advise that, as of this writing, ~~only 62 copies remain unspoken-for. If it interests you, please don’t delay: claim one right now!~~ It is now sold out!

Another look at the 2016 Wondermark calendar!

June 29, 2023December 7, 2015

Here’s another little peek at the 2016 Wondermark calendar! Just a li’l update to say, over half the calendars have already been sold. (Update: They are now all gone!) This is great for me! Maybe good for you too, if you got one? But maybe bad, if you haven’t yet!

I’ll be accepting orders in the ol’ store (for holiday cards, etc.) through December 18, after which we’ll close down for the holidays. Of course, over at TopatoCo they’re shipping tons of stuff all day long too! And T-Shirt Diplomacy, too. SO MANY CHOICES, SO MANY GOOD THINGS that people you love will think you are very cool for getting them!

I grew up in San Bernardino.

June 29, 2023December 3, 2015

Above: My dad, quoted in the San Bernardino Sun-Telegram, 1959. When Dad emigrated to America, he could have settled anywhere, really. He ended up in San Bernardino, where he built himself a business and a family and ran both with equal vigor for 50 years.

(Don’t worry — this isn’t going to be a Serious Political Post. Not really.)

Most likely you’ve heard the news this week from San Bernardino, California. A pair of jerks killed a bunch of probably real nice people. What a terrible, terrible event.

Lots of impassioned people are spilling gigaflops of pixel ink on the Big Issues raised by this mass shooting, the largest in…well, a short while.

Political points will be scored by people decrying their opponents for milking the event for political points.

People who already hate certain things (such as Muslims, or guns, or, like me, arguing on the Internet) will discover, folded into their perceptions of this event, newly colorful reasons to hate that same thing even more righteously.

I want to talk about the town. I was born and raised in San Bernardino. I lived there for 18 years, until I moved away to college. My mom and my sisters and their families live there now.

There — that little tiny intake of breath that I heard. If we were speaking face-to-face, I’d hear it clearly. What should I say? Is everything all right? I’m so sorry.

My family is fine. According to Facebook, some friends of friends may or may not have known some of the people affected. (The same is probably true of lots of different news events.)

I, personally (and thankfully), require no special sympathy or attention.

San Bernardino, though, could use some.

It’s had it pretty rough. It’s an old town, founded in the late 1800s, a gateway between the urban sprawl of Los Angeles and the desolate California desert.

It’s got two Rs in its name; it’s not San “Bernadino.” Get your hashtags right, people! Especially news organizations that should know better!

Police officer who responded to #SanBernadino shootings, speaks of “unspeakable” carnage https://t.co/wJgKbY0Wz9 pic.twitter.com/DqLJbBluzd

— BBC News (World) (@BBCWorld) December 4, 2015

It was a three-industry town: The Santa Fe railroad had headquarters in San Bernardino for many years, and there was the Kaiser Steel mill, and there was Norton Air Force Base, onetime home to dozens of now-obsolete C-141 Starlifters.

All three vanished during my adolescence. The railroad moved its headquarters elsewhere; the steel mill closed; and the base was shuttered. A lot of the people I went to high school with couldn’t wait to leave, and many of us did.

San Bernardino today is the palm-tree edition of the desolate Rust Belt factory town, seasoned with inner-city gang culture overflowing from Los Angeles and meth culture tumbling down from the desert.

Hugely expensive pension liabilities caused the city to declare bankruptcy a few years back, hurting city services, and sky-high unemployment and illegal drug traffic feed off and nourish each other.

So… I’ve never been entirely proud to say I was from San Bernardino. There are nice areas, sure; and around half the people are employed, which is good. My high school had (and continues to have) some good programs.

But at least I had the luxury of knowing that if I said where I was from, people might not know those terrible things about it.

“It’s the home of the very first McDonald’s restaurant,” I could say instead, or if the person is old I could say “Route 66 goes through the center of town,” or if the person looks cool I might say “If you’re going up to Big Bear to ski, you should stop and get a burrito at Rosa Maria’s on Sierra Way.”

Now, I fear that San Bernardino has entered the miserable fraternity of places known only as killing sites, like Sandy Hook, or Newtown, or Aurora.

In college, I had some friends from Littleton, Colorado. They had gone to Columbine High. They had already graduated and moved away when the shooting happened, and had had no involvement with it whatsoever.

Still, it was weird: I couldn’t imagine them having had a normal high school experience, because, you know, they’d gone to Columbine.

How many people will have that weird reaction now to San Bernardino? To the prospect of visiting, or buying property, or going to school, or doing business with my family and friends in San Bernardino? “That San Bernardino?”

I heard one of San Bernardino’s former mayors on the radio today. “We’re a town in transition,” he said wearily, and then, to make the perfunctory point: “I’d say we’re in recovery.”

The shooters’ victims are the fallen men and women. Let nothing take away from that horror, or their families’ grief.

But the shots went on to hit wider targets, too. I’m from San Bernardino. Yes, we must all now add, that San Bernardino.

First Look: Wondermark 2016 Calendar

June 29, 2023December 2, 2015

The 2016 Wondermark Calendar ~~is now available for pre-order!~~ UPDATE: It is now sold out!

We expect them to start shipping in mid-December. Here’s a first look at the (not final) cover…

Un-Named Beasts of the Forgotten Wilds; And, The Names I Gave Them

From the Personal Diaries of Dr Priscilla Dustbin, duly recorded on her many travels to the Shadowy Corners of the Globe;

Subsequently mislabeled in the Bodleian Library, and only recently rediscovered by Quite Surprised Researchers seeking Quite Different Things;

Presented here Whole and Entire, unexpurgated, unabridged, without redaction in Any Instance;

Even when it might have been wise to Do So, for the Safety and Well-being of the Reading Public;

All entries assumed True, or, at least, Honest Observations by the Doctor of what she Thought she Saw;

Further judgment Reserved.

As in previous years, the calendar rides through the year on a special backboard, which you may re-use from previous editions if you already have one.

New for this year, every order will ship with a miniature commemorative plaque. This ‘Cast Card’ will feature a portrait of one of the calendar’s characters, along with a full list of their vital statistics. It’s sort of like a baseball card, except not about baseball, and made of wood.

This Cast Card is unique in design to the calendar offering, and one will be included free with all orders. (For those keeping track, it is Cast Card release #2. We have also done one for the Multi-Purpose Cards Kickstarter, which is shipping to backers now!)

And another thing! The very first Wondermark calendar was released December 2007. If this will be your fifth calendar (or more), we consider you a Calendar Ace! If this describes you, then you qualify for a second unique Cast Card, celebrating your achievement. It is a free gift from us, to say thank you!

I’m big on commemorative plaques this season, friends.

More details on the calendar soon… Until then, you may feel free to ~~reserve your copy now! As always, these are strictly limited, and they sell out every year.~~ UPDATE: THEY HAVE

#1573; The Threat of Doing

— September 4th, 2025