Comic Transcripts

Easy Step-by-Step Instruction List — Utterly Foolproof
Home-Build a Potato Injector
[[Picture of Potato Injector – It’s got a crank, a needle, some faded potatoes in the background, and a picture of it being injected into some guys arm]]

Start – Time: A Weekend – Difficulty Moderate

Everyone has experienced trouble related to insufficient potato consumption. But how to make time for the labor involved in regular kitchen preparation? With the Potato Injector, the time for fretting is past. Using surgical-grade tubing, the Injector pipes pulped potato nectar into your body intravenously.

(1) Prepare your whittling tools. A good sharp chisel is of first importance in this work. Add to your kit an oilstone and strop. Place a few drops of oil on the stone and grind your blade upon its coarse side, then strop to remove the burr.

(2) Carve the necessary implements from a piece of dry cordwood (Fig. 1). Always try the wood before cutting into it, to ascertain which way the grain runs. In clear basswood it is usually quite straight, but sometimes it runs at a slight angle.
[[Picture of a hand crank attached to a cylinder]]

(3) Assemble the parts (Fig. 2) If you have carved them correctly they will go together in a very intuitive fashion. Some have reported shock at not landing upon this design independently, so simple and clear is it to create and build.
[[Abstruse depiction of a hand putting some sort of ring on a cylinder thing with a flared end]]

(4) Peel all potatoes (Fig. 3) before inserting into the injector. Potato-skins will clog the needle.
[[Picture of someone peeling a potato]]

(5) Tie off arm above the elbow and tap to make the basilic vein bulge. Daub with iodine and give the needle-crank three full turns.

(6) Once needle has seating, use foot pedal to advance nectar at a rate of one pint per minute.

{{alt-text: TROUBLESHOOTING: The injector becomes clogged after veinous insertion. SOLUTION: Pump foot-pedal vigorously. Potato will resume flowing.}}

The Tinkerer’s Handbook, Page 3 (of 8) transcribed by in

Easy Step-by-Step Instruction List — Utterly Foolproof
Home-Build a Potato Injector
[[Picture of Potato Injector – It’s got a crank, a needle, some faded potatoes in the background, and a picture of it being injected into some guys arm]]

Start – Time: A Weekend – Difficulty Moderate

Everyone has experienced trouble related to insufficient potato consumption. But how to make time for the labor involved in regular kitchen preparation? With the Potato Injector, the time for fretting is past. Using surgical-grade tubing, the Injector pipes pulped potato nectar into your body intravenously.

(1) Prepare your whittling tools. A good sharp chisel is of first importance in this work. Add to your kit an oilstone and strop. Place a few drops of oil on the stone and grind your blade upon its coarse side, then strop to remove the burr.

(2) Carve the necessary implements from a piece of dry cordwood (Fig. 1). Always try the wood before cutting into it, to ascertain which way the grain runs. In clear basswood it is usually quite straight, but sometimes it runs at a slight angle.
[[Picture of a hand crank attached to a cylinder]]

(3) Assemble the parts (Fig. 2) If you have carved them correctly they will go together in a very intuitive fashion. Some have reported shock at not landing upon this design independently, so simple and clear is it to create and build.
[[Abstruse depiction of a hand putting some sort of ring on a cylinder thing with a flared end]]

(4) Peel all potatoes (Fig. 3) before inserting into the injector. Potato-skins will clog the needle.
[[Picture of someone peeling a potato]]

(5) Tie off arm above the elbow and tap to make the basilic vein bulge. Daub with iodine and give the needle-crank three full turns.

(6) Once needle has seating, use foot pedal to advance nectar at a rate of one pint per minute.

{{alt-text: TROUBLESHOOTING: The injector becomes clogged after veinous insertion. SOLUTION: Pump foot-pedal vigorously. Potato will resume flowing.}}

The Tinkerer’s Handbook, Page 3 (of 8) transcribed by in

Easy Step-by-Step Instruction List -- Utterly Foolproof
Home-Build a Potato Injector
[[Picture of Potato Injector - It's got a crank, a needle, some faded potatoes in the background, and a picture of it being injected into some guys arm]]

Start - Time: A Weekend - Difficulty Moderate

Everyone has experienced trouble related to insufficient potato consumption. But how to make time for the labor involved in regular kitchen preparation? With the Potato Injector, the time for fretting is past. Using surgical-grade tubing, the Injector pipes pulped potato nectar into your body intravenously.

(1) Prepare your whittling tools. A good sharp chisel is of first importance in this work. Add to your kit an oilstone and strop. Place a few drops of oil on the stone and grind your blade upon its coarse side, then strop to remove the burr.

(2) Carve the necessary implements from a piece of dry cordwood (Fig. 1). Always try the wood before cutting into it, to ascertain which way the grain runs. In clear basswood it is usually quite straight, but sometimes it runs at a slight angle.
[[Picture of a hand crank attached to a cylinder]]

(3) Assemble the parts (Fig. 2) If you have carved them correctly they will go together in a very intuitive fashion. Some have reported shock at not landing upon this design independently, so simple and clear is it to create and build.
[[Abstruse depiction of a hand putting some sort of ring on a cylinder thing with a flared end]]

(4) Peel all potatoes (Fig. 3) before inserting into the injector. Potato-skins will clog the needle.
[[Picture of someone peeling a potato]]

(5) Tie off arm above the elbow and tap to make the basilic vein bulge. Daub with iodine and give the needle-crank three full turns.

(6) Once needle has seating, use foot pedal to advance nectar at a rate of one pint per minute.

{{alt-text: TROUBLESHOOTING: The injector becomes clogged after veinous insertion. SOLUTION: Pump foot-pedal vigorously. Potato will resume flowing.}}

TROUBLESHOOTING: The injector becomes clogged after veinous insertion. SOLUTION: Pump foot-pedal vigorously. Potato will resume flowing.

The Tinkerer’s Handbook, Page 3 (of 8)

  — April 28th, 2011

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My newest game: Noodle Battle! At PAX!

September 2, 2026 by David Malki !

The past few weeks have been a frenzy of assembling the very laborious, very bespoke first print run of NOODLE BATTLE, the puzzle game I am releasing this weekend at PAX West in Seattle!

PAX has an event called the PNW Tabletop Game Market (Saturday night ONLY), which is a curated selection of short-run games from local designers. As I’ve mentioned in this space before, I applied for a space in this fall’s event mainly as a way to force myself to finish a new game. And here it is!

The drawings are all by Jason Poland, good pal and cartoonist of My Dad Is Dracula. Jason played an early version of this game at Alaska Robotics Comics Camp this spring, and really liked it!

So I said, “Do you want to help me make it?” And so he has! It was his idea to make all the characters fun little animals, and I think it adds a ton of charm.

Because this edition is limited-run, it has been incredibly labor-intensive to make! The boxes and cards were made by a game factory in the usual fashion, but separately. The blank tiles were made by a woodworker dude out of Connecticut. For each game, we have had to:

  • Cut a piece of plastic and install the box window
  • Paint all the tiles, hundreds at a time
  • Apply a sticker to both sides of every tile
  • Apply stickers to the box (we couldn’t get the box back printed in time, so the whole back side of the box is a sticker too)
  • Apply the “Nutrition Facts” sticker, which was a late suggestion by my kid that I just had to run with
  • Fold up the rule sheet (they come from the printer as big strips of paper)
  • Put all the components into the box and seal it all up

I knew it would be a lot of work and would require some inefficient, expensive compromises AND I WAS RIGHT. But the final product is turning out great, which is the important thing!!

I will have 50 copies with me (if all goes well) at PAX, and then between now and the holidays we will be putting together additional copies to round out this first edition.

I will announce additional copies on Patreon first, once they are available online!! And here too, naturally, before long.

You can also sign up here if you’d like me to email you once the game is available online!


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