Comic Transcripts

The Electro-plasmic Hydrocephalic Genre-fiction Generator 2000
“The best of its type.”

START.
In a (n) { neo-noir, alternate-history, ancient, post-apocalyptic, dystopian, VR-simulated, metaphorical, anachronistic, leather-clad, coal-powered, dragon-filled, shrill | America, Japan, Soviet Russia, Victorian Britain, medieval Europe, Aztec empire, Atlantis, terraformed Mars, Antarctica, one-way spaceflight, Outer Rim world, set from Road Warrior,

a young { flying message courier, student of metaphysics, milquetoast office drone, schlub with mild OCD, farm boy with dreams, techno-obsessed geek, brooding loner, wise-cracking mercenary, idealistic revolutionary, journeyman inventor, collector of oddities, author self-insert

stumbles across a(n) { magic diadem, arcane prophecy, dusty tome, crazy old man, alien artifact, enchanted sword, otherworldly portal, dream-inducing drug, encrypted data feed, time-traveling soldier, exiled angel, talking fish

which spurs him into conflict with { a megalomaniacal dictator, a government conspiracy, a profit-obsessed corporation, a sneering wizard, supernatural monsters, computer viruses made real, murderous robots, an army led by a sadist, forces that encourage conformity, a charismatic politician on the rise, humanity’s selfish nature, his own insecurity vis-a-vis girls

with the help of a { sarcastic female techno-geek, tomboyish female mechanic, shape-shifting female assassin, leather-clad female in shades, girl who’s always loved him, bookish female scholar with mousy brown hair, cherubic girl with pigtails and spunk, female who inexplicably becomes attracted to the damaged protagonist for unstated reasons

and her { wacky pet, welding gear, closet full of assault rifles, reference book, cleavage, facility with magic, condescending tone, discomfort in formal wear, propensity for being captured,

culminating in { a fistfight atop a tower, a daring rescue preceding a giant explosion, a heroic sacrifice that no one will ever remember, a philosophical argument punctuated by violence, a false victory with the promise of future danger, the invocation of a spell at the last possible moment, eternal love professed without irony, the land restored to health, authorial preaching through the mouths of the characters, convoluted nonsense that squanders the readers’ goodwill, wish-fulfillment solutions to real-world problems, a cliffhanger for the sake of prompting a series.

Your title is: “The { Chrono, Neuro, Aero, Cosmo, Reve, Necro, Cyber, Astro, Psycho, Steam, Meta, Black | punk, mech, noiac, (o)poli, naut, phage, droid, bot, blade, tron, mancer, War} s.”

~ FINISHED.

{{header: tall tales at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: The generator weighs four thousand pounds and writes six hundred books a year.}}

#554; The Fiction Generator. transcribed by in

The Electro-plasmic Hydrocephalic Genre-fiction Generator 2000
“The best of its type.”

START.
In a (n) { neo-noir, alternate-history, ancient, post-apocalyptic, dystopian, VR-simulated, metaphorical, anachronistic, leather-clad, coal-powered, dragon-filled, shrill | America, Japan, Soviet Russia, Victorian Britain, medieval Europe, Aztec empire, Atlantis, terraformed Mars, Antarctica, one-way spaceflight, Outer Rim world, set from Road Warrior,

a young { flying message courier, student of metaphysics, milquetoast office drone, schlub with mild OCD, farm boy with dreams, techno-obsessed geek, brooding loner, wise-cracking mercenary, idealistic revolutionary, journeyman inventor, collector of oddities, author self-insert

stumbles across a(n) { magic diadem, arcane prophecy, dusty tome, crazy old man, alien artifact, enchanted sword, otherworldly portal, dream-inducing drug, encrypted data feed, time-traveling soldier, exiled angel, talking fish

which spurs him into conflict with { a megalomaniacal dictator, a government conspiracy, a profit-obsessed corporation, a sneering wizard, supernatural monsters, computer viruses made real, murderous robots, an army led by a sadist, forces that encourage conformity, a charismatic politician on the rise, humanity’s selfish nature, his own insecurity vis-a-vis girls

with the help of a { sarcastic female techno-geek, tomboyish female mechanic, shape-shifting female assassin, leather-clad female in shades, girl who’s always loved him, bookish female scholar with mousy brown hair, cherubic girl with pigtails and spunk, female who inexplicably becomes attracted to the damaged protagonist for unstated reasons

and her { wacky pet, welding gear, closet full of assault rifles, reference book, cleavage, facility with magic, condescending tone, discomfort in formal wear, propensity for being captured,

culminating in { a fistfight atop a tower, a daring rescue preceding a giant explosion, a heroic sacrifice that no one will ever remember, a philosophical argument punctuated by violence, a false victory with the promise of future danger, the invocation of a spell at the last possible moment, eternal love professed without irony, the land restored to health, authorial preaching through the mouths of the characters, convoluted nonsense that squanders the readers’ goodwill, wish-fulfillment solutions to real-world problems, a cliffhanger for the sake of prompting a series.

Your title is: “The { Chrono, Neuro, Aero, Cosmo, Reve, Necro, Cyber, Astro, Psycho, Steam, Meta, Black | punk, mech, noiac, (o)poli, naut, phage, droid, bot, blade, tron, mancer, War} s.”

~ FINISHED.

{{header: tall tales at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: The generator weighs four thousand pounds and writes six hundred books a year.}}

#554; The Fiction Generator. transcribed by in

The Electro-plasmic Hydrocephalic Genre-fiction Generator 2000
"The best of its type."

START.
In a (n) { neo-noir, alternate-history, ancient, post-apocalyptic, dystopian, VR-simulated, metaphorical, anachronistic, leather-clad, coal-powered, dragon-filled, shrill | America, Japan, Soviet Russia, Victorian Britain, medieval Europe, Aztec empire, Atlantis, terraformed Mars, Antarctica, one-way spaceflight, Outer Rim world, set from Road Warrior,

a young { flying message courier, student of metaphysics, milquetoast office drone, schlub with mild OCD, farm boy with dreams, techno-obsessed geek, brooding loner, wise-cracking mercenary, idealistic revolutionary, journeyman inventor, collector of oddities, author self-insert

stumbles across a(n) { magic diadem, arcane prophecy, dusty tome, crazy old man, alien artifact, enchanted sword, otherworldly portal, dream-inducing drug, encrypted data feed, time-traveling soldier, exiled angel, talking fish

which spurs him into conflict with { a megalomaniacal dictator, a government conspiracy, a profit-obsessed corporation, a sneering wizard, supernatural monsters, computer viruses made real, murderous robots, an army led by a sadist, forces that encourage conformity, a charismatic politician on the rise, humanity's selfish nature, his own insecurity vis-a-vis girls

with the help of a { sarcastic female techno-geek, tomboyish female mechanic, shape-shifting female assassin, leather-clad female in shades, girl who's always loved him, bookish female scholar with mousy brown hair, cherubic girl with pigtails and spunk, female who inexplicably becomes attracted to the damaged protagonist for unstated reasons

and her { wacky pet, welding gear, closet full of assault rifles, reference book, cleavage, facility with magic, condescending tone, discomfort in formal wear, propensity for being captured,

culminating in { a fistfight atop a tower, a daring rescue preceding a giant explosion, a heroic sacrifice that no one will ever remember, a philosophical argument punctuated by violence, a false victory with the promise of future danger, the invocation of a spell at the last possible moment, eternal love professed without irony, the land restored to health, authorial preaching through the mouths of the characters, convoluted nonsense that squanders the readers' goodwill, wish-fulfillment solutions to real-world problems, a cliffhanger for the sake of prompting a series.

Your title is: "The { Chrono, Neuro, Aero, Cosmo, Reve, Necro, Cyber, Astro, Psycho, Steam, Meta, Black | punk, mech, noiac, (o)poli, naut, phage, droid, bot, blade, tron, mancer, War} s."

~ FINISHED.

{{header: tall tales at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: The generator weighs four thousand pounds and writes six hundred books a year.}}

The generator weighs four thousand pounds and writes six hundred books a year.

See also: Nebu’s automated version.

Applications open for Genius Northwest – an IRL gaming competition

Last year, I participated in Genius Northwest, a gaming competition inspired by the Korean gameshow The Genius and its ilk.

It’s a reality show without the cameras — a 3-day, all-inclusive weekend retreat structured around a series of challenges and puzzles, in which personalities and dealmaking matter as much as playing games.

It’s truly a remarkable thing. I came in dead last in the competition, but I still had a great time participating.

The event is held annually in the Pacific Northwest (hence the name) and applications are now open to participate in the 2026 competition!

Learn more — and apply — at GeniusNW.com.


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