Comic Transcripts

MCMURHPY: Makin’ some Hot Pockets, you gonna want any?
CAP’N JASPER: No way, man, that stuff’s all full of sodium.
CAP’N JASPER: Should call ’em “Heart Pockets.” Like, uh, your heart’s gonna be in…uh…in a pocket. Of sodium. Didn’t really think that one through.

MCMURPHY: So what. Everything’s got sodium in it. Same way they add fluoride to water.
CAP’N JASPER: Yeah, it’s a real problem. Our legislature is at the mercy of Big Salt.

[[The Capitol]]
SENATOR KICKBACK: You have some gall, Mr. Morton! There’s no way I’m adding this rider to the education act!
MS. MORTON: Unless I’m mistaken, Senator, you served quite a few margaritas at your fund-raisers. Went over well, did they? Now YOU need to do something for US.

{{header: keep it fresh at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: no! not the umbrella! not in the face!}}

#331; In which Nobody gets Goiters transcribed by in

MCMURHPY: Makin’ some Hot Pockets, you gonna want any?
CAP’N JASPER: No way, man, that stuff’s all full of sodium.
CAP’N JASPER: Should call ’em “Heart Pockets.” Like, uh, your heart’s gonna be in…uh…in a pocket. Of sodium. Didn’t really think that one through.

MCMURPHY: So what. Everything’s got sodium in it. Same way they add fluoride to water.
CAP’N JASPER: Yeah, it’s a real problem. Our legislature is at the mercy of Big Salt.

[[The Capitol]]
SENATOR KICKBACK: You have some gall, Mr. Morton! There’s no way I’m adding this rider to the education act!
MS. MORTON: Unless I’m mistaken, Senator, you served quite a few margaritas at your fund-raisers. Went over well, did they? Now YOU need to do something for US.

{{header: keep it fresh at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: no! not the umbrella! not in the face!}}

#331; In which Nobody gets Goiters transcribed by in

MCMURHPY: Makin' some Hot Pockets, you gonna want any?
CAP'N JASPER: No way, man, that stuff's all full of sodium.
CAP'N JASPER: Should call 'em "Heart Pockets." Like, uh, your heart's gonna be in...uh...in a pocket. Of sodium. Didn't really think that one through.

MCMURPHY: So what. Everything's got sodium in it. Same way they add fluoride to water.
CAP'N JASPER: Yeah, it's a real problem. Our legislature is at the mercy of Big Salt.

[[The Capitol]]
SENATOR KICKBACK: You have some gall, Mr. Morton! There's no way I'm adding this rider to the education act!
MS. MORTON: Unless I'm mistaken, Senator, you served quite a few margaritas at your fund-raisers. Went over well, did they? Now YOU need to do something for US.

{{header: keep it fresh at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: no! not the umbrella! not in the face!}}

no! not the umbrella! not in the face!

#331; In which Nobody gets Goiters

  — August 28th, 2007

[ Tags: , , ]       Permalink: https://wondermark.com/c/331/

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Applications open for Genius Northwest – an IRL gaming competition

May 8, 2026 by David Malki !

Last year, I participated in Genius Northwest, a gaming competition inspired by the Korean gameshow The Genius and its ilk.

It’s a reality show without the cameras — a 3-day, all-inclusive weekend retreat structured around a series of challenges and puzzles, in which personalities and dealmaking matter as much as playing games.

It’s truly a remarkable thing. I came in dead last in the competition, but I still had a great time participating.

The event is held annually in the Pacific Northwest (hence the name) and applications are now open to participate in the 2026 competition!

Learn more — and apply — at GeniusNW.com.


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