EVAN: I’ve got it! I’m gonna sue everyone!
EVAN: And it won’t matter if I have no case! They’ll pay me to settle, just to avoid the even greater expense of going to trial!

EVAN: The perfect moneymaking scheme!
SEÑOR EUGENE: Hey! Scumbag! Get a real job instead of preying on people!
SEÑOR EUGENE: People like you are making everyone afraid of lawsuits, making everything everywhere more expensive!

EVAN: My friend, you’ve just volunteered to be my first victim!
SEÑOR EUGENE {{his hand raised to his ear}} : Huh? Oh, I wasn’t talking to you. I’m on my Bluetooth phone.
SEÑOR EUGENE: Can you hear me now? How ’bout now?

SEÑOR EUGENE: That probably would’ve gone better if I’d actually been wearing an earpiece.
DEEPANKAR: Well, you didn’t know he’d have the papers WITH him.

{{header: call it out at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: if you get one of those cheap phones with the candy inside, you can have the freedom to speak your mind PLUS delicious candy}}

#323; In which it Almost Worked transcribed by in

EVAN: I’ve got it! I’m gonna sue everyone!
EVAN: And it won’t matter if I have no case! They’ll pay me to settle, just to avoid the even greater expense of going to trial!

SEÑOR EUGENE: That probably would’ve gone better if I’d actually been wearing an earpiece.
DEEPANKAR: Well, you didn’t know he’d have the papers WITH him.

{{header: call it out at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: if you get one of those cheap phones with the candy inside, you can have the freedom to speak your mind PLUS delicious candy}}

#323; In which it Almost Worked transcribed by in

EVAN: I've got it! I'm gonna sue everyone!
EVAN: And it won't matter if I have no case! They'll pay me to settle, just to avoid the even greater expense of going to trial!

EVAN: My friend, you've just volunteered to be my first victim!
SEÑOR EUGENE {{his hand raised to his ear}} : Huh? Oh, I wasn't talking to you. I'm on my Bluetooth phone.
SEÑOR EUGENE: Can you hear me now? How 'bout now?

SEÑOR EUGENE: That probably would've gone better if I'd actually been wearing an earpiece.
DEEPANKAR: Well, you didn't know he'd have the papers WITH him.

{{header: call it out at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: if you get one of those cheap phones with the candy inside, you can have the freedom to speak your mind PLUS delicious candy}}

if you get one of those cheap phones with the candy inside, you can have the freedom to speak your mind PLUS delicious candy

#323; In which it Almost Worked

— July 31st, 2007

[ Tags: bureaucracy, schemes, technology ] Permalink: https://wondermark.com/c/323/

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Applications open for Genius Northwest – an IRL gaming competition

May 8, 2026 by David Malki !

Last year, I participated in Genius Northwest, a gaming competition inspired by the Korean gameshow The Genius and its ilk.

It’s a reality show without the cameras — a 3-day, all-inclusive weekend retreat structured around a series of challenges and puzzles, in which personalities and dealmaking matter as much as playing games.

It’s truly a remarkable thing. I came in dead last in the competition, but I still had a great time participating.

The event is held annually in the Pacific Northwest (hence the name) and applications are now open to participate in the 2026 competition!

Learn more — and apply — at GeniusNW.com.

Comic Transcripts

#323; In which it Almost Worked

— July 31st, 2007

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