#1029; The Children I Haven’t Had

Comic Transcripts

[[A well-dressed man in a suit and a scruffier-looking man in a bowler hat make conversation.]]
Suit: So, you and Molly have any kids yet?
Bowler: With MOLLY? No. I don’t have any kids with MOLLY.
Bowler: And if I have EVER had any kids at ALL, with Molly OR any hypothetical OTHER person, Molly definitely doesn’t KNOW about them.

Bowler: No kids that I LOVE and would want to BEAR MY FAMILY NAME, anyway.
Bowler: DEFINITELY no kids that I want to talk to YOU about.

[[Molly intervenes.]]
Bowler: I don’t know if you know what this is like, but… I have never had a child that I was PROUD of.
Bowler: And I have never seen a child of mine survive being dropped into the old well behind Patterson’s decrepit barn.
Bowler: Probably because, you see, I have NEVER had a child that was BORN HUMAN
Molly: Come here

Bowler: Everything I said was a factual statement!
Molly: Listen to me
Molly: My family is starting to suspect that you are WEIRD

{{header: make a little WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: Technically, I’ve never been to a funeral for your grandmother that I HAVEN’T ruined!}}

#1029; The Children I Haven’t Had transcribed by in

Bolted! games have been shipping to backers over the last couple of weeks! The non-US orders are (mostly) done and some folks have been reporting receiving them already!

@davidmalki.com My game arrived today!! It looks gorgeous 🙂 Hope you are well 🙂

[image or embed]
— Lar deSouza (@lartist.bsky.social) April 2, 2026 at 2:52 PM

My US inventory of games is now in-country, but still being staged at the fulfillment centers. It’s being distributed to regional warehouses, so the actual shipping to backers happens more efficiently. I hope the bulk of US shipping will start next week.

These are what the cartons (and games) look like!

bolted! games BOLTED! GAMES (pounding the table) B O L T E D ! G A M E S

[image or embed]
— david malki ! (@davidmalki.com) April 3, 2026 at 10:37 AM

I am also waiting on the bonus cards to be finished printing! I ended up needing many more of those than I had anticipated, so I decided to have the game factory print those too, for perfect matching with the base game cards.

Most people will be receiving two separate mailings: the game itself, and “anything else” (bonus cards and/or add-ons) which will be sent by me personally.

As of today, 86% of backers have completed their surveys so far! That’s pretty good, but it’s not everyone. I know YOU PERSONALLY have already completed YOURS though, so no worries!!

We have now moved OFF of Kickstarter and ONTO BackerKit for any new orders. You can bundle a game with basically anything else I sell on that there website, it’s pretty nuts!