Comic Transcripts

[[SCHMORDY chats with the sitting LOWENDA.]]

SCHMORDY:  I think the KEY to breaking bad habits is to remember that your brain is a PHYSICAL thing.  Neural connections are real.  So rather than try to WISH myself into eating better or spending less time on the internet, I’m attempting CHEMISTRY.

LOWENDA: I’ve told you for years, I have PLENTY of drugs if you want to try WHATEVER.

SCHMORDY: Kind of you to offer, but no…
SCHMORDY: I think it’s all about coming up with systems that work WITH they way your body NATURALLY FUNCTIONS, you know?  That really is the only way to make a lasting change.

LOWENDA: So the key is to figure out how to trick your body into releasing dopamine when you DON’T eat junk food, or when you DON’T lose hours in scrolling.

SCHMORDY: That’s it precisely!  A way to give my body an advantage over the harmful habit!

CAPTION: MEANWHILE, AT THE SNACK-FOODS-AND-SOCIAL-MEDIA CONVENTION:

[[A snack food/social media executive stands at a lectern, addressing a crowd.]]

EXECUTIVE: YEEAHHH…We’ve collectively spent TRILLIONS inventing industries solely devoted to figuring out extremely effective ways to make our products hit your dopamine buttons.  So good luck with that

{{header: stand up to WONDERMARK.COM}}

#1394; In which a Brain is hacked transcribed by in

[[SCHMORDY chats with the sitting LOWENDA.]]

SCHMORDY:  I think the KEY to breaking bad habits is to remember that your brain is a PHYSICAL thing.  Neural connections are real.  So rather than try to WISH myself into eating better or spending less time on the internet, I'm attempting CHEMISTRY.

LOWENDA: I've told you for years, I have PLENTY of drugs if you want to try WHATEVER.

SCHMORDY: Kind of you to offer, but no...
SCHMORDY: I think it's all about coming up with systems that work WITH they way your body NATURALLY FUNCTIONS, you know?  That really is the only way to make a lasting change.

LOWENDA: So the key is to figure out how to trick your body into releasing dopamine when you DON'T eat junk food, or when you DON'T lose hours in scrolling.

SCHMORDY: That's it precisely!  A way to give my body an advantage over the harmful habit!

CAPTION: MEANWHILE, AT THE SNACK-FOODS-AND-SOCIAL-MEDIA CONVENTION:

[[A snack food/social media executive stands at a lectern, addressing a crowd.]]

EXECUTIVE: YEEAHHH...We've collectively spent TRILLIONS inventing industries solely devoted to figuring out extremely effective ways to make our products hit your dopamine buttons.  So good luck with that

{{header: stand up to WONDERMARK.COM}}

''triggering your dopamine response'' just means ''making you feel good'', but then again ''helping you lose weight'' can also mean ''stealing your kidneys''

#1394; In which a Brain is hacked

  — April 24th, 2018

[ Tags: , ]       Permalink: https://wondermark.com/c/1394/

Buy a Print

My newest game: Noodle Battle! At PAX!

September 2, 2026 by David Malki !

The past few weeks have been a frenzy of assembling the very laborious, very bespoke first print run of NOODLE BATTLE, the puzzle game I am releasing this weekend at PAX West in Seattle!

PAX has an event called the PNW Tabletop Game Market (Saturday night ONLY), which is a curated selection of short-run games from local designers. As I’ve mentioned in this space before, I applied for a space in this fall’s event mainly as a way to force myself to finish a new game. And here it is!

The drawings are all by Jason Poland, good pal and cartoonist of My Dad Is Dracula. Jason played an early version of this game at Alaska Robotics Comics Camp this spring, and really liked it!

So I said, “Do you want to help me make it?” And so he has! It was his idea to make all the characters fun little animals, and I think it adds a ton of charm.

Because this edition is limited-run, it has been incredibly labor-intensive to make! The boxes and cards were made by a game factory in the usual fashion, but separately. The blank tiles were made by a woodworker dude out of Connecticut. For each game, we have had to:

  • Cut a piece of plastic and install the box window
  • Paint all the tiles, hundreds at a time
  • Apply a sticker to both sides of every tile
  • Apply stickers to the box (we couldn’t get the box back printed in time, so the whole back side of the box is a sticker too)
  • Apply the “Nutrition Facts” sticker, which was a late suggestion by my kid that I just had to run with
  • Fold up the rule sheet (they come from the printer as big strips of paper)
  • Put all the components into the box and seal it all up

I knew it would be a lot of work and would require some inefficient, expensive compromises AND I WAS RIGHT. But the final product is turning out great, which is the important thing!!

I will have 50 copies with me (if all goes well) at PAX, and then between now and the holidays we will be putting together additional copies to round out this first edition.

I will announce additional copies on Patreon first, once they are available online!! And here too, naturally, before long.

You can also sign up here if you’d like me to email you once the game is available online!


Recent blog posts