Comic Transcripts

[[An artist complains to a potential patron (who appears to just be an arbitrary bystander).]]
Artist: Well, I hope you’re HAPPY! My whole project is a shambles!
Patron: What PROJECT
Artist: My personal exploration of the ISSUES facing my generation. It WAS to be a series of a hundred life-sized sculpted Cheeto self-portraits crafted meticulously by hand.
Patron: An exploration to what end?

Artist: I DON’T KNOW! Hence an EXPLORATION. But it’ll all fall apart if I can’t renew my grocery store license so I can get a bulk rate on Cheeto blanks! It’s CRUCIAL!
Artist: This is IMPORTANT! This is MEANINGFUL! It’s EVERYTHING I’ve been BUILDING toward! Step up to the plate and pitch in fifty bucks!
Patron: What are you even DOING
Patron: Why would I ENCOURAGE this

Artist: It’s my ART. It’s my PASSION. It’s what I have to SAY. Without your support, I can’t proceed. I can’t make the art.
Artist: Am I STUTTERING? Why are you HESITATING? What’s NOT to GET?

Patron: I think it sounds dumb.
Artist: Oh of COURSE
Artist: The CLASSIC PHILISTINE EXCUSE

{{header: the world-shattering WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: For just TWO HUNDRED DOLLARS you can help me pay the speeding ticket that I got while I was driving here to ask you for money}}

#1127; For Want of a Patron transcribed by in

[[An artist complains to a potential patron (who appears to just be an arbitrary bystander).]]
Artist: Well, I hope you’re HAPPY! My whole project is a shambles!
Patron: What PROJECT
Artist: My personal exploration of the ISSUES facing my generation. It WAS to be a series of a hundred life-sized sculpted Cheeto self-portraits crafted meticulously by hand.
Patron: An exploration to what end?

Artist: I DON’T KNOW! Hence an EXPLORATION. But it’ll all fall apart if I can’t renew my grocery store license so I can get a bulk rate on Cheeto blanks! It’s CRUCIAL!
Artist: This is IMPORTANT! This is MEANINGFUL! It’s EVERYTHING I’ve been BUILDING toward! Step up to the plate and pitch in fifty bucks!
Patron: What are you even DOING
Patron: Why would I ENCOURAGE this

Artist: It’s my ART. It’s my PASSION. It’s what I have to SAY. Without your support, I can’t proceed. I can’t make the art.
Artist: Am I STUTTERING? Why are you HESITATING? What’s NOT to GET?

Patron: I think it sounds dumb.
Artist: Oh of COURSE
Artist: The CLASSIC PHILISTINE EXCUSE

{{header: the world-shattering WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: For just TWO HUNDRED DOLLARS you can help me pay the speeding ticket that I got while I was driving here to ask you for money}}

#1127; For Want of a Patron transcribed by in

[[An artist complains to a potential patron (who appears to just be an arbitrary bystander).]]
Artist: Well, I hope you're HAPPY! My whole project is a shambles!
Patron: What PROJECT
Artist: My personal exploration of the ISSUES facing my generation. It WAS to be a series of a hundred life-sized sculpted Cheeto self-portraits crafted meticulously by hand.
Patron: An exploration to what end?

Artist: I DON'T KNOW! Hence an EXPLORATION. But it'll all fall apart if I can't renew my grocery store license so I can get a bulk rate on Cheeto blanks! It's CRUCIAL!
Artist: This is IMPORTANT! This is MEANINGFUL! It's EVERYTHING I've been BUILDING toward! Step up to the plate and pitch in fifty bucks!
Patron: What are you even DOING
Patron: Why would I ENCOURAGE this

Artist: It's my ART. It's my PASSION. It's what I have to SAY. Without your support, I can't proceed. I can't make the art.
Artist: Am I STUTTERING? Why are you HESITATING? What's NOT to GET?

Patron: I think it sounds dumb.
Artist: Oh of COURSE
Artist: The CLASSIC PHILISTINE EXCUSE

{{header: the world-shattering WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: For just TWO HUNDRED DOLLARS you can help me pay the speeding ticket that I got while I was driving here to ask you for money}}

For just TWO HUNDRED DOLLARS you can help me pay the speeding ticket that I got while I was driving here to ask you for money

#1127; For Want of a Patron

  — May 21st, 2015

[ Tags: , , ]       Permalink: https://wondermark.com/c/1127/

Buy a Print

Applications open for Genius Northwest – an IRL gaming competition

May 8, 2026 by David Malki !

Last year, I participated in Genius Northwest, a gaming competition inspired by the Korean gameshow The Genius and its ilk.

It’s a reality show without the cameras — a 3-day, all-inclusive weekend retreat structured around a series of challenges and puzzles, in which personalities and dealmaking matter as much as playing games.

It’s truly a remarkable thing. I came in dead last in the competition, but I still had a great time participating.

The event is held annually in the Pacific Northwest (hence the name) and applications are now open to participate in the 2026 competition!

Learn more — and apply — at GeniusNW.com.


Recent blog posts