Comic Transcripts

[[A man in a crumpled hat and another in a straw hat are sitting at a yard sale, selling various goods.]]
Crumple: It’s so humbling, isn’t it?
Crumple: Years of possessions, spread out for strangers to inspect and reject
Crumple: Look at that guy. He doesn’t know how amazing that book is. He doesn’t care! He’ll never know! His loss!

Crumple: Come ON, people! That candle’s only half burned down! That seed packet could probably become FOOD, after some elaborate process!
Crumple: Surely there’s still SOME valuable info in the manual for Microsoft Office 2000!

Crumple: That armoire could be refinished! Those shelves are good scrap wood! Someone could disassemble that VCR and use its gears to make a brooch to sell on Etsy!
Crumple: Don’t sniff at my chair, you snob! That huge jelly stain doesn’t affect its STABILITY as a FUNCTIONAL CHAIR!

Straw: But YOU don’t want any of it either!
Straw: Why do you think anyone ELSE would want to fill their lives with random half-useful junk if YOU won’t?
Crumple: I REFUSE to believe I have the lowest standards of anyone in this neighborhood!

{{header: come see our WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: I’m sure we live near SOME Mad-Max-like scavenger living his or her life desperate to wring out my cast-off possessions for some hypothetical remnant-dregs of possible usefulness – BUT WE *HAD* TO SCHEDULE OUR SALE DURING BURNING MAN}}

#1060; The Whole Nine Yard Sale transcribed by in

[[A man in a crumpled hat and another in a straw hat are sitting at a yard sale, selling various goods.]]
Crumple: It's so humbling, isn't it?
Crumple: Years of possessions, spread out for strangers to inspect and reject
Crumple: Look at that guy. He doesn't know how amazing that book is. He doesn't care! He'll never know! His loss!

Crumple: Come ON, people! That candle's only half burned down! That seed packet could probably become FOOD, after some elaborate process!
Crumple: Surely there's still SOME valuable info in the manual for Microsoft Office 2000!

Crumple: That armoire could be refinished! Those shelves are good scrap wood! Someone could disassemble that VCR and use its gears to make a brooch to sell on Etsy!
Crumple: Don't sniff at my chair, you snob! That huge jelly stain doesn't affect its STABILITY as a FUNCTIONAL CHAIR!

Straw: But YOU don't want any of it either!
Straw: Why do you think anyone ELSE would want to fill their lives with random half-useful junk if YOU won't?
Crumple: I REFUSE to believe I have the lowest standards of anyone in this neighborhood!

{{header: come see our WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: I'm sure we live near SOME Mad-Max-like scavenger living his or her life desperate to wring out my cast-off possessions for some hypothetical remnant-dregs of possible usefulness - BUT WE *HAD* TO SCHEDULE OUR SALE DURING BURNING MAN}}

I'm sure we live near SOME Mad-Max-like scavenger living his or her life desperate to wring out my cast-off possessions for some hypothetical remnant-dregs of possible usefulness -- BUT WE *HAD* TO SCHEDULE OUR SALE DURING BURNING MAN

#1060; The Whole Nine Yard Sale

  — September 9th, 2014

[ Tags: , , ]       Permalink: https://wondermark.com/c/1060/

A note on the images that were used to make today’s comic — many came from Flickr via the Internet Archive! More info here.

Here’s more on the yard sale conundrum.

Buy a Print

New ways to get Bolted!

July 24, 2026 by David Malki !

In addition to buying things directly from me, the normal way, my game Bolted! is also now available on Amazon dot com.

On that famous website, you can also get the Creature-Crafting Magnets Set, which is made of the same artwork from the game, but is just a weird little trinket (not a playable game).

My kiddo made the elaborate version below to show off just how many magnets you get in the set (it’s 150 pieces in all — this isn’t even all of them).

Also now on Amazon is my set of Multi-Purpose Greeting Cards — a full dozen cards with envelopes in a fancy, unbranded, foil-stamped box!

Event alert!

I’ll also be showing off Bolted! at Greenwood Games, an event in Seattle this Saturday:

Greenwood Games is a free, all-ages community game event that invites players to spend the afternoon walking Greenwood Avenue from 65th to 80th, collecting clues, cracking puzzles, and discovering games made right here in Washington.

Think of it as Pride Hop, ArtWalk, and the Gumshoe all rolled into one,  except the whole thing is built around games and puzzles.​

Local game designers will be set up at different places along Greenwood Avenue in Phinney Ridge (near Ballard). My specific spot will be the “Holy Mountain Phinney Ridge Taproom”. All the information about all the different games & venues is on the website!

(If you’re in Seattle generally but not free tomorrow, Bolted! is also stocked at Blue Highway Games in Queen Anne.)

Next week, I’ll be at Gen Con! I personally will be hanging with my buddy Sam Logan at BFE Webcomics, booth #1217… but I have it on good authority that copies of Bolted! will be available at the CRWN Studios booth, #2549.

Visit one booth! Then the other! The order…is up to you.


Recent blog posts