[[A man in a crumpled hat and another in a straw hat are sitting at a yard sale, selling various goods.]]
Crumple: It's so humbling, isn't it?
Crumple: Years of possessions, spread out for strangers to inspect and reject
Crumple: Look at that guy. He doesn't know how amazing that book is. He doesn't care! He'll never know! His loss!
Crumple: Come ON, people! That candle's only half burned down! That seed packet could probably become FOOD, after some elaborate process!
Crumple: Surely there's still SOME valuable info in the manual for Microsoft Office 2000!
Crumple: That armoire could be refinished! Those shelves are good scrap wood! Someone could disassemble that VCR and use its gears to make a brooch to sell on Etsy!
Crumple: Don't sniff at my chair, you snob! That huge jelly stain doesn't affect its STABILITY as a FUNCTIONAL CHAIR!
Straw: But YOU don't want any of it either!
Straw: Why do you think anyone ELSE would want to fill their lives with random half-useful junk if YOU won't?
Crumple: I REFUSE to believe I have the lowest standards of anyone in this neighborhood!
{{header: come see our WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: I'm sure we live near SOME Mad-Max-like scavenger living his or her life desperate to wring out my cast-off possessions for some hypothetical remnant-dregs of possible usefulness - BUT WE *HAD* TO SCHEDULE OUR SALE DURING BURNING MAN}}