Comic Transcripts

The Electro-plasmic Hydrocephalic Genre-fiction Generator 2000
“The best of its type.”

START.
In a (n) { neo-noir, alternate-history, ancient, post-apocalyptic, dystopian, VR-simulated, metaphorical, anachronistic, leather-clad, coal-powered, dragon-filled, shrill | America, Japan, Soviet Russia, Victorian Britain, medieval Europe, Aztec empire, Atlantis, terraformed Mars, Antarctica, one-way spaceflight, Outer Rim world, set from Road Warrior,

a young { flying message courier, student of metaphysics, milquetoast office drone, schlub with mild OCD, farm boy with dreams, techno-obsessed geek, brooding loner, wise-cracking mercenary, idealistic revolutionary, journeyman inventor, collector of oddities, author self-insert

stumbles across a(n) { magic diadem, arcane prophecy, dusty tome, crazy old man, alien artifact, enchanted sword, otherworldly portal, dream-inducing drug, encrypted data feed, time-traveling soldier, exiled angel, talking fish

which spurs him into conflict with { a megalomaniacal dictator, a government conspiracy, a profit-obsessed corporation, a sneering wizard, supernatural monsters, computer viruses made real, murderous robots, an army led by a sadist, forces that encourage conformity, a charismatic politician on the rise, humanity’s selfish nature, his own insecurity vis-a-vis girls

with the help of a { sarcastic female techno-geek, tomboyish female mechanic, shape-shifting female assassin, leather-clad female in shades, girl who’s always loved him, bookish female scholar with mousy brown hair, cherubic girl with pigtails and spunk, female who inexplicably becomes attracted to the damaged protagonist for unstated reasons

and her { wacky pet, welding gear, closet full of assault rifles, reference book, cleavage, facility with magic, condescending tone, discomfort in formal wear, propensity for being captured,

culminating in { a fistfight atop a tower, a daring rescue preceding a giant explosion, a heroic sacrifice that no one will ever remember, a philosophical argument punctuated by violence, a false victory with the promise of future danger, the invocation of a spell at the last possible moment, eternal love professed without irony, the land restored to health, authorial preaching through the mouths of the characters, convoluted nonsense that squanders the readers’ goodwill, wish-fulfillment solutions to real-world problems, a cliffhanger for the sake of prompting a series.

Your title is: “The { Chrono, Neuro, Aero, Cosmo, Reve, Necro, Cyber, Astro, Psycho, Steam, Meta, Black | punk, mech, noiac, (o)poli, naut, phage, droid, bot, blade, tron, mancer, War} s.”

~ FINISHED.

{{header: tall tales at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: The generator weighs four thousand pounds and writes six hundred books a year.}}

#554; The Fiction Generator. transcribed by in

The Electro-plasmic Hydrocephalic Genre-fiction Generator 2000
“The best of its type.”

START.
In a (n) { neo-noir, alternate-history, ancient, post-apocalyptic, dystopian, VR-simulated, metaphorical, anachronistic, leather-clad, coal-powered, dragon-filled, shrill | America, Japan, Soviet Russia, Victorian Britain, medieval Europe, Aztec empire, Atlantis, terraformed Mars, Antarctica, one-way spaceflight, Outer Rim world, set from Road Warrior,

a young { flying message courier, student of metaphysics, milquetoast office drone, schlub with mild OCD, farm boy with dreams, techno-obsessed geek, brooding loner, wise-cracking mercenary, idealistic revolutionary, journeyman inventor, collector of oddities, author self-insert

stumbles across a(n) { magic diadem, arcane prophecy, dusty tome, crazy old man, alien artifact, enchanted sword, otherworldly portal, dream-inducing drug, encrypted data feed, time-traveling soldier, exiled angel, talking fish

which spurs him into conflict with { a megalomaniacal dictator, a government conspiracy, a profit-obsessed corporation, a sneering wizard, supernatural monsters, computer viruses made real, murderous robots, an army led by a sadist, forces that encourage conformity, a charismatic politician on the rise, humanity’s selfish nature, his own insecurity vis-a-vis girls

with the help of a { sarcastic female techno-geek, tomboyish female mechanic, shape-shifting female assassin, leather-clad female in shades, girl who’s always loved him, bookish female scholar with mousy brown hair, cherubic girl with pigtails and spunk, female who inexplicably becomes attracted to the damaged protagonist for unstated reasons

and her { wacky pet, welding gear, closet full of assault rifles, reference book, cleavage, facility with magic, condescending tone, discomfort in formal wear, propensity for being captured,

culminating in { a fistfight atop a tower, a daring rescue preceding a giant explosion, a heroic sacrifice that no one will ever remember, a philosophical argument punctuated by violence, a false victory with the promise of future danger, the invocation of a spell at the last possible moment, eternal love professed without irony, the land restored to health, authorial preaching through the mouths of the characters, convoluted nonsense that squanders the readers’ goodwill, wish-fulfillment solutions to real-world problems, a cliffhanger for the sake of prompting a series.

Your title is: “The { Chrono, Neuro, Aero, Cosmo, Reve, Necro, Cyber, Astro, Psycho, Steam, Meta, Black | punk, mech, noiac, (o)poli, naut, phage, droid, bot, blade, tron, mancer, War} s.”

~ FINISHED.

{{header: tall tales at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: The generator weighs four thousand pounds and writes six hundred books a year.}}

#554; The Fiction Generator. transcribed by in

The Electro-plasmic Hydrocephalic Genre-fiction Generator 2000
"The best of its type."

START.
In a (n) { neo-noir, alternate-history, ancient, post-apocalyptic, dystopian, VR-simulated, metaphorical, anachronistic, leather-clad, coal-powered, dragon-filled, shrill | America, Japan, Soviet Russia, Victorian Britain, medieval Europe, Aztec empire, Atlantis, terraformed Mars, Antarctica, one-way spaceflight, Outer Rim world, set from Road Warrior,

a young { flying message courier, student of metaphysics, milquetoast office drone, schlub with mild OCD, farm boy with dreams, techno-obsessed geek, brooding loner, wise-cracking mercenary, idealistic revolutionary, journeyman inventor, collector of oddities, author self-insert

stumbles across a(n) { magic diadem, arcane prophecy, dusty tome, crazy old man, alien artifact, enchanted sword, otherworldly portal, dream-inducing drug, encrypted data feed, time-traveling soldier, exiled angel, talking fish

which spurs him into conflict with { a megalomaniacal dictator, a government conspiracy, a profit-obsessed corporation, a sneering wizard, supernatural monsters, computer viruses made real, murderous robots, an army led by a sadist, forces that encourage conformity, a charismatic politician on the rise, humanity's selfish nature, his own insecurity vis-a-vis girls

with the help of a { sarcastic female techno-geek, tomboyish female mechanic, shape-shifting female assassin, leather-clad female in shades, girl who's always loved him, bookish female scholar with mousy brown hair, cherubic girl with pigtails and spunk, female who inexplicably becomes attracted to the damaged protagonist for unstated reasons

and her { wacky pet, welding gear, closet full of assault rifles, reference book, cleavage, facility with magic, condescending tone, discomfort in formal wear, propensity for being captured,

culminating in { a fistfight atop a tower, a daring rescue preceding a giant explosion, a heroic sacrifice that no one will ever remember, a philosophical argument punctuated by violence, a false victory with the promise of future danger, the invocation of a spell at the last possible moment, eternal love professed without irony, the land restored to health, authorial preaching through the mouths of the characters, convoluted nonsense that squanders the readers' goodwill, wish-fulfillment solutions to real-world problems, a cliffhanger for the sake of prompting a series.

Your title is: "The { Chrono, Neuro, Aero, Cosmo, Reve, Necro, Cyber, Astro, Psycho, Steam, Meta, Black | punk, mech, noiac, (o)poli, naut, phage, droid, bot, blade, tron, mancer, War} s."

~ FINISHED.

{{header: tall tales at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: The generator weighs four thousand pounds and writes six hundred books a year.}}

The generator weighs four thousand pounds and writes six hundred books a year.

#554; The Fiction Generator.

  — September 22nd, 2009

[ Tags: , ]       Permalink: https://wondermark.com/c/554/

See also: Nebu’s automated version.

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Bolted! Shipping is UNDERWAY

April 4, 2026 by David Malki !

Bolted! games have been shipping to backers over the last couple of weeks! The non-US orders are (mostly) done and some folks have been reporting receiving them already!

@davidmalki.com My game arrived today!! It looks gorgeous 🙂 Hope you are well 🙂

[image or embed]

— Lar deSouza (@lartist.bsky.social) April 2, 2026 at 2:52 PM

My US inventory of games is now in-country, but still being staged at the fulfillment centers. It’s being distributed to regional warehouses, so the actual shipping to backers happens more efficiently. I hope the bulk of US shipping will start next week.

These are what the cartons (and games) look like!

bolted! games BOLTED! GAMES (pounding the table) B O L T E D ! G A M E S

[image or embed]

— david malki ! (@davidmalki.com) April 3, 2026 at 10:37 AM

I am also waiting on the bonus cards to be finished printing! I ended up needing many more of those than I had anticipated, so I decided to have the game factory print those too, for perfect matching with the base game cards.

Most people will be receiving two separate mailings: the game itself, and “anything else” (bonus cards and/or add-ons) which will be sent by me personally.

As of today, 86% of backers have completed their surveys so far! That’s pretty good, but it’s not everyone. I know YOU PERSONALLY have already completed YOURS though, so no worries!!

We have now moved OFF of Kickstarter and ONTO BackerKit for any new orders. You can bundle a game with basically anything else I sell on that there website, it’s pretty nuts!


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