PAUL: Boy, do I have some strong opinions about the war in Iraq!
DAWN: Too late! Everyone's talking about bank bailouts! The economy is a critical issue! We're watching it very closely!
PAUL: All right, I think I finally have a grasp on all the shenanigans in the financial sector?
DAWN: Too late! Old news! Health care is the biggest problem facing our society since Dukakis rode a tank! Grave pronouncements are hitting the media at rates unseen since the Cuban missile crisis!
PAUL: It took a while, but I read the entire health care bill and I -
DAWN: Too late! We've moved on to the oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico! It's so tragic it makes Hamlet look like 3-2-1 Contact! It's the worst marine disaster since Noah's flood! Everyone is very concerned! Brow-furrowing is at an all-time high!
PAUL: Okay! Let's really get to the bottom of this asteroids-for-lasers scandal!
DAWN: Too early
PAUL: DANGIT
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{{alt-text: We've got to get through the Supreme Court sex scandal, then Bee Flu, THEN asteroids-for-lasers.}}