Comic Transcripts

GLENN: I can’t BELIEVE this! Everyone’s looking for HANDOUTS from the government!
ARIANNA: Who? Who’s looking for handouts?
GLENN: EVERYONE! Old ladies! Dogs! Chinamen!

GLENN: The government’s not Santa Claus. You don’t get PRESENTS from the President. You pay RESPECTS to the government! You get down on your KNEES!
ARIANNA: You do not PRAY to GEORGE WASHINGTON.
GLENN: YOU don’t! Because you’re CROOKED!

GLENN: LOOK! If you KILL A DENTIST, George will bless your womb with a superhuman baby IMMUNE TO ALL KNOWN DISEASES! Why does nobody GET this?
Then health care becomes a moot point!
ARIANNA: I can’t TAKE this. I CANNOT have this argument with you. It’s NONSENSE.
[[ARIANNA leaves.]]

GLENN (shouting after her): SO I WIN!

{{Header: shout at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{Alt-text: George Washington’s hatred for dentists boils yet from his grave.}}

#606; A Satisfying Conclusion transcribed by in

GLENN: I can't BELIEVE this! Everyone's looking for HANDOUTS from the government!
ARIANNA: Who? Who's looking for handouts?
GLENN: EVERYONE! Old ladies! Dogs! Chinamen!

GLENN: The government's not Santa Claus. You don't get PRESENTS from the President. You pay RESPECTS to the government! You get down on your KNEES!
ARIANNA: You do not PRAY to GEORGE WASHINGTON.
GLENN: YOU don't! Because you're CROOKED!

GLENN: LOOK! If you KILL A DENTIST, George will bless your womb with a superhuman baby IMMUNE TO ALL KNOWN DISEASES! Why does nobody GET this?
Then health care becomes a moot point!
ARIANNA: I can't TAKE this. I CANNOT have this argument with you. It's NONSENSE.
[[ARIANNA leaves.]]

GLENN (shouting after her): SO I WIN!

{{Header: shout at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{Alt-text: George Washington's hatred for dentists boils yet from his grave.}}

George Washington's hatred for dentists boils yet from his grave.

#606; A Satisfying Conclusion

  — March 23rd, 2010

[ Tags: , , ]       Permalink: https://wondermark.com/c/606/

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Applications open for Genius Northwest – an IRL gaming competition

May 8, 2026 by David Malki !

Last year, I participated in Genius Northwest, a gaming competition inspired by the Korean gameshow The Genius and its ilk.

It’s a reality show without the cameras — a 3-day, all-inclusive weekend retreat structured around a series of challenges and puzzles, in which personalities and dealmaking matter as much as playing games.

It’s truly a remarkable thing. I came in dead last in the competition, but I still had a great time participating.

The event is held annually in the Pacific Northwest (hence the name) and applications are now open to participate in the 2026 competition!

Learn more — and apply — at GeniusNW.com.


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