Comic Transcripts

[[A group of businessmen are having a meeting. The fellow running the meeting is offpanel. Let’s call him CHESTER.]]
CHESTER: Congratulations, gentlemen!
Another Halloween passed without incident.
No children were poisoned by HOMEMADE COOKIES laced with strychnine.

[[Same as first panel, but slightly closer.]]
CHESTER: No rosy little cheeks were SLASHED by RAZOR-LADEN APPLES.
This year, like every other year, ALL the treats consumed were SAFE.

[[Same as first and second, but closer.]]
CHESTER: Thank heavens our shrill, insistent warnings were heeded!
Our paranoia-inducing hypervigilance has once again saved a generation of children from certain harm.
AND WE DO THIS GLADLY.

[[CHESTER stands in front of a chart with a thin-lipped smile on his face.]]
CHESTER: After all, children are our future!
[[The chart is titled PACKAGED CANDY SALES and shows a sharp increase for the month of October.]]

{{Header: save WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{Alt-text: Teach them well, and let them lead the way along the path we have clearly outlined for them with $18.99 reflective tape.}}

#567; O Selfless Saviors transcribed by in

[[A group of businessmen are having a meeting. The fellow running the meeting is offpanel. Let’s call him CHESTER.]]
CHESTER: Congratulations, gentlemen!
Another Halloween passed without incident.
No children were poisoned by HOMEMADE COOKIES laced with strychnine.

[[Same as first panel, but slightly closer.]]
CHESTER: No rosy little cheeks were SLASHED by RAZOR-LADEN APPLES.
This year, like every other year, ALL the treats consumed were SAFE.

[[Same as first and second, but closer.]]
CHESTER: Thank heavens our shrill, insistent warnings were heeded!
Our paranoia-inducing hypervigilance has once again saved a generation of children from certain harm.
AND WE DO THIS GLADLY.

[[CHESTER stands in front of a chart with a thin-lipped smile on his face.]]
CHESTER: After all, children are our future!
[[The chart is titled PACKAGED CANDY SALES and shows a sharp increase for the month of October.]]

{{Header: save WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{Alt-text: Teach them well, and let them lead the way along the path we have clearly outlined for them with $18.99 reflective tape.}}

#567; O Selfless Saviors transcribed by in

[[A group of businessmen are having a meeting. The fellow running the meeting is offpanel. Let's call him CHESTER.]]
CHESTER: Congratulations, gentlemen!
Another Halloween passed without incident.
No children were poisoned by HOMEMADE COOKIES laced with strychnine.

[[Same as first panel, but slightly closer.]]
CHESTER: No rosy little cheeks were SLASHED by RAZOR-LADEN APPLES.
This year, like every other year, ALL the treats consumed were SAFE.

[[Same as first and second, but closer.]]
CHESTER: Thank heavens our shrill, insistent warnings were heeded!
Our paranoia-inducing hypervigilance has once again saved a generation of children from certain harm.
AND WE DO THIS GLADLY.

[[CHESTER stands in front of a chart with a thin-lipped smile on his face.]]
CHESTER: After all, children are our future!
[[The chart is titled PACKAGED CANDY SALES and shows a sharp increase for the month of October.]]

{{Header: save WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{Alt-text: Teach them well, and let them lead the way along the path we have clearly outlined for them with $18.99 reflective tape.}}

Teach them well, and let them lead the way along the path we have clearly outlined for them with $18.99 reflective tape.

#567; O Selfless Saviors

  — November 3rd, 2009

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Applications open for Genius Northwest – an IRL gaming competition

May 8, 2026 by David Malki !

Last year, I participated in Genius Northwest, a gaming competition inspired by the Korean gameshow The Genius and its ilk.

It’s a reality show without the cameras — a 3-day, all-inclusive weekend retreat structured around a series of challenges and puzzles, in which personalities and dealmaking matter as much as playing games.

It’s truly a remarkable thing. I came in dead last in the competition, but I still had a great time participating.

The event is held annually in the Pacific Northwest (hence the name) and applications are now open to participate in the 2026 competition!

Learn more — and apply — at GeniusNW.com.


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