Comic Transcripts

[[OCTAVIO and DENNIS are talking in the street.]]
OCTAVIO: Isn’t it great knowing that no matter what you do, there’s someone better at it than you? More dedicated? More committed?

OCTAVIO: Like playing video games? For every hour you play, some Korean kid plays five. Name any sport you like. Some dweeb-o’s been at it all day every day since he could walk. And forget about creative media. In this day and age, not even the most avid hobbyist can compete with “pirated software and zero social life.”
OCTAVIO: I mean anything. The dumbest thing you can concieve of, I guarantee some nerd is a certified expert at it.
DENNIS: Bouncing a wiffle ball on the shell of an irate turtle while chanting archaic epithets in every Indo-European language?
OCTAVIO: Saw a dude do it on YouTube for a week straight.

DENNIS: What if I’m okay with not being the world’s greatest at something? What if I’m content with being an easygoing, well-rounded individual whose pursuits are more about personal enjoyment than internet competitiveness?
OCTAVIO: This guy in Norway’s been doing that since Eisenhower. And he has a theme song.

{{header: second best at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: waitaminnit! it’s NOT great to know that, what are you TALKING about}}

#285; In which Everyone is a Failure transcribed by in

[[OCTAVIO and DENNIS are talking in the street.]]
OCTAVIO: Isn’t it great knowing that no matter what you do, there’s someone better at it than you? More dedicated? More committed?

OCTAVIO: Like playing video games? For every hour you play, some Korean kid plays five. Name any sport you like. Some dweeb-o’s been at it all day every day since he could walk. And forget about creative media. In this day and age, not even the most avid hobbyist can compete with “pirated software and zero social life.”
OCTAVIO: I mean anything. The dumbest thing you can concieve of, I guarantee some nerd is a certified expert at it.
DENNIS: Bouncing a wiffle ball on the shell of an irate turtle while chanting archaic epithets in every Indo-European language?
OCTAVIO: Saw a dude do it on YouTube for a week straight.

DENNIS: What if I’m okay with not being the world’s greatest at something? What if I’m content with being an easygoing, well-rounded individual whose pursuits are more about personal enjoyment than internet competitiveness?
OCTAVIO: This guy in Norway’s been doing that since Eisenhower. And he has a theme song.

{{header: second best at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: waitaminnit! it’s NOT great to know that, what are you TALKING about}}

#285; In which Everyone is a Failure transcribed by in

[[OCTAVIO and DENNIS are talking in the street.]]
OCTAVIO: Isn't it great knowing that no matter what you do, there's someone better at it than you? More dedicated? More committed?

OCTAVIO: Like playing video games? For every hour you play, some Korean kid plays five. Name any sport you like. Some dweeb-o's been at it all day every day since he could walk. And forget about creative media. In this day and age, not even the most avid hobbyist can compete with "pirated software and zero social life."
OCTAVIO: I mean anything. The dumbest thing you can concieve of, I guarantee some nerd is a certified expert at it.
DENNIS: Bouncing a wiffle ball on the shell of an irate turtle while chanting archaic epithets in every Indo-European language?
OCTAVIO: Saw a dude do it on YouTube for a week straight.

DENNIS: What if I'm okay with not being the world's greatest at something? What if I'm content with being an easygoing, well-rounded individual whose pursuits are more about personal enjoyment than internet competitiveness?
OCTAVIO: This guy in Norway's been doing that since Eisenhower. And he has a theme song.

{{header: second best at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: waitaminnit! it's NOT great to know that, what are you TALKING about}}

waitaminnit! it's NOT great to know that, what are you TALKING about

Applications open for Genius Northwest – an IRL gaming competition

Last year, I participated in Genius Northwest, a gaming competition inspired by the Korean gameshow The Genius and its ilk.

It’s a reality show without the cameras — a 3-day, all-inclusive weekend retreat structured around a series of challenges and puzzles, in which personalities and dealmaking matter as much as playing games.

It’s truly a remarkable thing. I came in dead last in the competition, but I still had a great time participating.

The event is held annually in the Pacific Northwest (hence the name) and applications are now open to participate in the 2026 competition!

Learn more — and apply — at GeniusNW.com.


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