IVAN: Pardon me, sir.
SIG: What? What IS it? I'm trying to SHOP!
IVAN: I'm sorry to bother you. It's just...it appears that you are attempting to steal watermelons?
SIG [[we now see his bulging pants]]: How DARE you!
SIG: I have GLOBULAR THIGH DISORDER! It's a very rare condition that renders my thighs the exact shape of watermelons! It's miserable to live with!
IVAN: Sorry, sir. We just have to check when it seems...
SIG: SEEMS WHAT? I am discriminated against enough without your petty accusations on top of it all!
IVAN: You have our full apology.
ALICIA: So did you steal them watermelons?
SIG: Naw, I couldn't on account of my globular thighs
{{header: swell up to WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: He'd gotten halfway to the market before the swelling started up again. 'Well,' he thought to himself, 'let's see if I can still pull this off.' He couldn't -- either the plan, or, later at home, his pants.}}