Comic Transcripts

Two men are chatting in an office. The first man, CHILTRED, dressed in an elaborate military uniform, is twirling his moustache, and continues to do so throughout the exchange, without pause.

CHILTRED: I heard this great joke earlier. What WAS it? AARRGH!! I can’t remember! Something about dogs and ducks. DANGIT!! It was really funny. Now it’s GONE.

PERMBLEY (the other man, seated): Is the distress you’re feeling now greater than the joy the joke gave you originally?

CHILTRED: Oh, enormously.

PERMBLEY: So the EXISTENCE of this joke has been a NET LOSS for you! Don’t REGRET its disappearance! RUE that it ever appeared! CURSE ITS MEMORY!!

CHILTRED: I don’t HAVE its memory!

PERMBLEY: It has inflicted a joke-shaped SCAR on your psyche! FIE ON YOU, sinister dog joke! NEVER AGAIN dare to darken my dear friend’s skull!

CHILTRED: WAIT. I remembered it.

PERMBLEY: NOPE! Don’t you DARE!!

CHILTRED: It’s not the JOKE’S fault I forgot it! It’s innocent!

PERMBLEY: I will never be able to separate it from the trauma it has inflicted!

CHILTRED: That starts to sound like a YOU problem.

PERMBLEY: Wow. WOW. After I DEFENDED you.

CHILTRED: I did not INTEND to spend an APPARENTLY-CONDITIONAL friend defense on a JOKE about DOGS and DUCKS

#1572; In which a Joke is disowned transcribed by in

Two men are chatting in an office. The first man, CHILTRED, dressed in an elaborate military uniform, is twirling his moustache, and continues to do so throughout the exchange, without pause.

CHILTRED: I heard this great joke earlier. What WAS it? AARRGH!! I can't remember! Something about dogs and ducks. DANGIT!! It was really funny. Now it's GONE.

PERMBLEY (the other man, seated): Is the distress you're feeling now greater than the joy the joke gave you originally?

CHILTRED: Oh, enormously.

PERMBLEY: So the EXISTENCE of this joke has been a NET LOSS for you! Don't REGRET its disappearance! RUE that it ever appeared! CURSE ITS MEMORY!!

CHILTRED: I don't HAVE its memory!

PERMBLEY: It has inflicted a joke-shaped SCAR on your psyche! FIE ON YOU, sinister dog joke! NEVER AGAIN dare to darken my dear friend's skull!

CHILTRED: WAIT. I remembered it.

PERMBLEY: NOPE! Don't you DARE!!

CHILTRED: It's not the JOKE'S fault I forgot it! It's innocent!

PERMBLEY: I will never be able to separate it from the trauma it has inflicted!

CHILTRED: That starts to sound like a YOU problem.

PERMBLEY: Wow. WOW. After I DEFENDED you.

CHILTRED: I did not INTEND to spend an APPARENTLY-CONDITIONAL friend defense on a JOKE about DOGS and DUCKS

I took my dog to the duck pond. It caused a huge problem. I should have anticipated it....after all, he's pure-bread.

#1572; In which a Joke is disowned

  — August 16th, 2025

[ Tags: , , ]       Permalink: https://wondermark.com/c/1572/

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Buy a Print

New ways to get Bolted!

July 24, 2026 by David Malki !

In addition to buying things directly from me, the normal way, my game Bolted! is also now available on Amazon dot com.

On that famous website, you can also get the Creature-Crafting Magnets Set, which is made of the same artwork from the game, but is just a weird little trinket (not a playable game).

My kiddo made the elaborate version below to show off just how many magnets you get in the set (it’s 150 pieces in all — this isn’t even all of them).

Also now on Amazon is my set of Multi-Purpose Greeting Cards — a full dozen cards with envelopes in a fancy, unbranded, foil-stamped box!

Event alert!

I’ll also be showing off Bolted! at Greenwood Games, an event in Seattle this Saturday:

Greenwood Games is a free, all-ages community game event that invites players to spend the afternoon walking Greenwood Avenue from 65th to 80th, collecting clues, cracking puzzles, and discovering games made right here in Washington.

Think of it as Pride Hop, ArtWalk, and the Gumshoe all rolled into one,  except the whole thing is built around games and puzzles.​

Local game designers will be set up at different places along Greenwood Avenue in Phinney Ridge (near Ballard). My specific spot will be the “Holy Mountain Phinney Ridge Taproom”. All the information about all the different games & venues is on the website!

(If you’re in Seattle generally but not free tomorrow, Bolted! is also stocked at Blue Highway Games in Queen Anne.)

Next week, I’ll be at Gen Con! I personally will be hanging with my buddy Sam Logan at BFE Webcomics, booth #1217… but I have it on good authority that copies of Bolted! will be available at the CRWN Studios booth, #2549.

Visit one booth! Then the other! The order…is up to you.


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