Science-Doktor Vondurdauðahöfuðkúpa watched through the tall, sloped windows as Eyjafjallajökull began to spew clouds of brown, billowing ash.
“This will prove that I am serious,” he sneered, checking his command console for the blinking light that would indicate a phone message. Those fools at NATO headquarters had missed the deadline to respond –… Read more...
Modeling a lovely Survival Kit bag! Photo by Carly Monardo.
Thank you to everyone who came out to the Emerald City con in Seattle! We had fun at the TopatoCo Castle and especially at the TMH Live pre-party. I’m very much looking forward to sharing the video of the event with you… Read more...
A hundred birds leapt at once from the shaking earth. A leaf fell; the first of many, as the pounding grew stronger, more violent, more energetic. A slight burning smell tickled the nose of a dog, trotting across a field. At the next deep, crackling slam, the dog turned and ran the opposite direction… Read more...
The Cop Who Plays By All The Rules
The night pecked spotty rain against Officer Jack “Bulletproof” Bulletproof’s patrol-car windshield. Through the dappled glass, a Jeep sat idling on the highway shoulder, its blinker still flashing at the black cornfield beyond. In the seat next to Bulletproof, Officer Daytona Follies… Read more...
Behold the next step in Fiction-Generating technology! I was frankly astonished at the speed and felicity with which Marksmen wrote me this morning with programmed versions of the Fiction Generator 2000. Many thanks to Dean R., Nicholas N., Dan, Rod V.
I was talking with a friend about a Twitter-based fiction contest that he’d seen, and he mentioned that this contest had stipulated genre requirements. So, of course, the conversation turned to how short a story could possibly be and still have some recognizable genre. I postulated that it wouldn’t take much at all:
“A final tear… Read more...
Some excerpts from my upcoming novelization of the Watchmen movie:
page 54:
The Comedian fired again, his tear-gas canister ricocheting from the side of a school bus and into a crowd of protesters. With his goggles’ magnification turned on, Dreiberg could see a woman coughing and weeping… Read more...
You may know that 2008 was predicted to be the year of bears in ill-fitting hats — and boy was it ever.
But what now, in 2009?
In 2009, we tell their stories.
Misty, by halcyonsnow
Misty stood still even as the last rays of sunlight… Read more...
Niche audience alert! I’m guessing MAYBE 0.1% of readers will be served by the following bit of trivia: in this week’s New York Times “Stuart Elliott’s In Advertising” email newsletter, the anonymous spoof question — the one Mr. Elliott called “delightful” and “a good note on which to end the Q&A’s for the year” — was written by me.
Rejected by McSweeney’s:
The Fourth Pac-Man Ghost Posts on Craigslist
Bike for sale – $50 (bicycles):
10-speed bike for sale. It’s blue — sorry, I don’t know much about bikes. Great condition, never used. I got it as a gift but unfortunately have no legs.
Yellow sweater at Starbucks (missed connections):
You: Gorgeous brunette, trendy sunglasses, legs for days. Me… Read more...
