Comic Transcripts

MAGGIE: Honey, we have to teach the baby Portuguese.
JOHN: Dare I ask why? / MAGGIE: I was just thinking…the Millie Spangler type is big into teaching babies Mandarin, so they can compete in the future global economy.
MAGGIE: So…in twenty years the Chinese business world will be flooded with these kids! If we want to stay one step ahead, we have to get Billy in good stead for the next big powerhouse. BRAZIL. / JOHN: “One step ahead?” You mean, if we want to one-up Millie Spangler. / MAGGIE: She’s beat us on homebirth. She’s beat us on preschool. John. This is our only chance.
[[Later]] MAGGIE: Millie! How are you? How’s the baby? / Millie: Just wonderful! We’ve been teaching him Lingala, so he’ll be uniquely qualified to do humanitarian work in the Congo. / MAGGIE: But… / MILLIE: CHECK AND MATE

{{header: jump ahead at WONDERMARK.com}}
{{alt-text: It’s okay. We still have time to ensure that Billy becomes a world-class cellist. I DON’T CARE THAT THIS IS HARDLY A SUSTAINABLE CAREER IT SOUNDS IMPORTANT}}

#577; Children are a Weapon transcribed by in

MAGGIE: Honey, we have to teach the baby Portuguese.
JOHN: Dare I ask why? / MAGGIE: I was just thinking…the Millie Spangler type is big into teaching babies Mandarin, so they can compete in the future global economy.
MAGGIE: So…in twenty years the Chinese business world will be flooded with these kids! If we want to stay one step ahead, we have to get Billy in good stead for the next big powerhouse. BRAZIL. / JOHN: “One step ahead?” You mean, if we want to one-up Millie Spangler. / MAGGIE: She’s beat us on homebirth. She’s beat us on preschool. John. This is our only chance.
[[Later]] MAGGIE: Millie! How are you? How’s the baby? / Millie: Just wonderful! We’ve been teaching him Lingala, so he’ll be uniquely qualified to do humanitarian work in the Congo. / MAGGIE: But… / MILLIE: CHECK AND MATE

{{header: jump ahead at WONDERMARK.com}}
{{alt-text: It’s okay. We still have time to ensure that Billy becomes a world-class cellist. I DON’T CARE THAT THIS IS HARDLY A SUSTAINABLE CAREER IT SOUNDS IMPORTANT}}

#577; Children are a Weapon transcribed by in

MAGGIE: Honey, we have to teach the baby Portuguese.
JOHN: Dare I ask why? / MAGGIE: I was just thinking...the Millie Spangler type is big into teaching babies Mandarin, so they can compete in the future global economy.
MAGGIE: So...in twenty years the Chinese business world will be flooded with these kids! If we want to stay one step ahead, we have to get Billy in good stead for the next big powerhouse. BRAZIL. / JOHN: "One step ahead?" You mean, if we want to one-up Millie Spangler. / MAGGIE: She's beat us on homebirth. She's beat us on preschool. John. This is our only chance.
[[Later]] MAGGIE: Millie! How are you? How's the baby? / Millie: Just wonderful! We've been teaching him Lingala, so he'll be uniquely qualified to do humanitarian work in the Congo. / MAGGIE: But... / MILLIE: CHECK AND MATE

{{header: jump ahead at WONDERMARK.com}}
{{alt-text: It's okay. We still have time to ensure that Billy becomes a world-class cellist. I DON'T CARE THAT THIS IS HARDLY A SUSTAINABLE CAREER IT SOUNDS IMPORTANT}}

It's okay. We still have time to ensure that Billy becomes a world-class classical cellist. I DON'T CARE THAT THAT IS HARDLY A SUSTAINABLE CAREER IT SOUNDS IMPORTANT

#577; Children are a Weapon

  — December 8th, 2009

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20 years ago (in photocomic form)

June 9, 2026 by David Malki !
A young David Malki !, Steve Carey, and Ryan North, June 2006.

The computers tell me it was 20 years ago, June 9, 2006, that I arrived in New York for my first-ever comic convention as an exhibitor, MoCCA.

It was an important trip for me, a milestone in what would go on to become my career.

I wrote a little reminiscence on Patreon (free/unlocked) — including a first-since-then reprint of the photocomics I made at the time, documenting the trip!

Read the rest here: [ 20 Years Ago (In Photocomic Form) ]


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