[[SIDNEY sits on an overturned rowboat. A large seabird stands before him.]]
SIDNEY: Go AWAY Bird.
I don' got no biscuits, no bread, no SMILES even.
Don' need another desperate stare in my life neither.
SIDNEY: Why you STANDING there? I don' got nothing I can give you that you gonna want.
Don't LOOK at me like that! You gonna trigger a thing insideways that's been doing just fine shielded by the gut layer!
BIRD! You--you better know you are playing with fire, Bird!
Now you look away! NOW YOU LEAVE ME BE!
SIDNEY: AAAHH your constant, belittling gaze turns my venoms backward! so much self-conscious that it cracks my stoic facade!
You WIN, Bird! You WIN! I am a sadly man! NOTHING I do is EVER for success!
BIRD (thinking): Apparently including feeding the dang birds.
{{Header: fixate on WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{Alt-text: The bird was hoping for a little piece of crouton or something, but absent that, will happily take that hat.}}