Comic Transcripts

ALEX (silently staring at a woman): “I like your dress.” C’mon. Say it.
“I like your dress.”
“I like your dress.”

ALEX (still to himself): There is zero risk here. She’ll say “thank you.” Just say it. Open your mouth and say it.
“I like your dress.”
You’re not saying it.

ALEX: No conversation will result. There is no potential for rejection. Think of it simply as a training exercise to banish shyness.
She’s pulling away! Break the conditioning! It is legitimately a nice dress!
SAY IT SAY IT SAY IT SAY IT SAY IT

[[The woman is now out of the panel.]]
ALEX (quietly dying a thousand deaths): AAARRRGGHHHH

[[The woman is alone in the last panel.]]
TINA (to herself): Bluh, I always get STARED at in this dress.

{{Header: don’t hold back at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{Alt-text: but it’s not like taking it off and walking around in my underwear is any better! If anything, it’s WORSE!}}

#499; In which Alex just can’t manage it transcribed by in

ALEX (silently staring at a woman): “I like your dress.” C’mon. Say it.
“I like your dress.”
“I like your dress.”

ALEX (still to himself): There is zero risk here. She’ll say “thank you.” Just say it. Open your mouth and say it.
“I like your dress.”
You’re not saying it.

ALEX: No conversation will result. There is no potential for rejection. Think of it simply as a training exercise to banish shyness.
She’s pulling away! Break the conditioning! It is legitimately a nice dress!
SAY IT SAY IT SAY IT SAY IT SAY IT

[[The woman is now out of the panel.]]
ALEX (quietly dying a thousand deaths): AAARRRGGHHHH

[[The woman is alone in the last panel.]]
TINA (to herself): Bluh, I always get STARED at in this dress.

{{Header: don’t hold back at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{Alt-text: but it’s not like taking it off and walking around in my underwear is any better! If anything, it’s WORSE!}}

#499; In which Alex just can’t manage it transcribed by in

ALEX (silently staring at a woman): "I like your dress." C'mon. Say it.
"I like your dress."
"I like your dress."

ALEX (still to himself): There is zero risk here. She'll say "thank you." Just say it. Open your mouth and say it.
"I like your dress."
You're not saying it.

ALEX: No conversation will result. There is no potential for rejection. Think of it simply as a training exercise to banish shyness.
She's pulling away! Break the conditioning! It is legitimately a nice dress!
SAY IT SAY IT SAY IT SAY IT SAY IT

[[The woman is now out of the panel.]]
ALEX (quietly dying a thousand deaths): AAARRRGGHHHH

[[The woman is alone in the last panel.]]
TINA (to herself): Bluh, I always get STARED at in this dress.

{{Header: don't hold back at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{Alt-text: but it's not like taking it off and walking around in my underwear is any better! If anything, it's WORSE!}}

but it's not like taking it off and walking around in my underwear is any better! If anything, it's WORSE.

My newest game: Noodle Battle! At PAX!

The past few weeks have been a frenzy of assembling the very laborious, very bespoke first print run of NOODLE BATTLE, the puzzle game I am releasing this weekend at PAX West in Seattle!

PAX has an event called the PNW Tabletop Game Market (Saturday night ONLY), which is a curated selection of short-run games from local designers. As I’ve mentioned in this space before, I applied for a space in this fall’s event mainly as a way to force myself to finish a new game. And here it is!

The drawings are all by Jason Poland, good pal and cartoonist of My Dad Is Dracula. Jason played an early version of this game at Alaska Robotics Comics Camp this spring, and really liked it!

So I said, “Do you want to help me make it?” And so he has! It was his idea to make all the characters fun little animals, and I think it adds a ton of charm.

Because this edition is limited-run, it has been incredibly labor-intensive to make! The boxes and cards were made by a game factory in the usual fashion, but separately. The blank tiles were made by a woodworker dude out of Connecticut. For each game, we have had to:

  • Cut a piece of plastic and install the box window
  • Paint all the tiles, hundreds at a time
  • Apply a sticker to both sides of every tile
  • Apply stickers to the box (we couldn’t get the box back printed in time, so the whole back side of the box is a sticker too)
  • Apply the “Nutrition Facts” sticker, which was a late suggestion by my kid that I just had to run with
  • Fold up the rule sheet (they come from the printer as big strips of paper)
  • Put all the components into the box and seal it all up

I knew it would be a lot of work and would require some inefficient, expensive compromises AND I WAS RIGHT. But the final product is turning out great, which is the important thing!!

I will have 50 copies with me (if all goes well) at PAX, and then between now and the holidays we will be putting together additional copies to round out this first edition.

I will announce additional copies on Patreon first, once they are available online!! And here too, naturally, before long.

You can also sign up here if you’d like me to email you once the game is available online!


Recent blog posts