#1071; Old Dog, Oldest Trick

Comic Transcripts

Man: People are afraid to TALK these days for fear of OFFENDING someone! It’s UNBELIEVABLE!

Man: You can’t do ANYTHING without someone taking it as an INSULT!
Man: You can’t talk like you’d NORMALLY talk, full of all the invective and slurs you’d NORMALLY use, without the objects of that invective feeling belittled and dehumanized by it!

Man: You can’t even step on people’s FEET without them crying out in pain! You have to try and AVOID stepping on them at ALL if you don’t want to be accused of HURTING them! It’s MADNESS!!
Man: You can’t TRAMPLE THE MULTITUDES without a weak moan from the very bottom of the body-pile making you feel momentarily a tiny bit sheepish!!

Man: What’s the world COMING to, when you’re tacitly encouraged NOT to simply stop about wherever you like, heedless of the humanity of others? What KIND of WORLD are we CREATING??
Woman: One where —
Man: The QUESTION was OBVIOUSLY RHETORICAL

{{header: toughen up at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: It’s like you can’t even unhinge your jaw and let the dark pour out unheeded into the world at large anymore, without the all-consuming void gushing from your black center devouring the stars and the birds and the sun and the elements that combine to make love possible!}}

#1071; Old Dog, Oldest Trick transcribed by in

Man: People are afraid to TALK these days for fear of OFFENDING someone! It’s UNBELIEVABLE!

#1071; Old Dog, Oldest Trick transcribed by in

Man: People are afraid to TALK these days for fear of OFFENDING someone! It's UNBELIEVABLE!

Man: You can't do ANYTHING without someone taking it as an INSULT!
Man: You can't talk like you'd NORMALLY talk, full of all the invective and slurs you'd NORMALLY use, without the objects of that invective feeling belittled and dehumanized by it!

Man: You can't even step on people's FEET without them crying out in pain! You have to try and AVOID stepping on them at ALL if you don't want to be accused of HURTING them! It's MADNESS!!
Man: You can't TRAMPLE THE MULTITUDES without a weak moan from the very bottom of the body-pile making you feel momentarily a tiny bit sheepish!!

Man: What's the world COMING to, when you're tacitly encouraged NOT to simply stop about wherever you like, heedless of the humanity of others? What KIND of WORLD are we CREATING??
Woman: One where --
Man: The QUESTION was OBVIOUSLY RHETORICAL

{{header: toughen up at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: It's like you can't even unhinge your jaw and let the dark pour out unheeded into the world at large anymore, without the all-consuming void gushing from your black center devouring the stars and the birds and the sun and the elements that combine to make love possible!}}

It's like you can't even unhinge your jaw and let the dark pour out unheeded into the world at large anymore, without the all-consuming void gushing from your black center devouring the stars and the birds and the sun and the elements that combine to make love possible!

#1071; Old Dog, Oldest Trick

— October 24th, 2014

[ Tags: nostalgia, politics, the culture, violence ] Permalink: https://wondermark.com/c/1071/

Buy a Print

The past few weeks have been a frenzy of assembling the very laborious, very bespoke first print run of NOODLE BATTLE, the puzzle game I am releasing this weekend at PAX West in Seattle!

PAX has an event called the PNW Tabletop Game Market (Saturday night ONLY), which is a curated selection of short-run games from local designers. As I’ve mentioned in this space before, I applied for a space in this fall’s event mainly as a way to force myself to finish a new game. And here it is!

The drawings are all by Jason Poland, good pal and cartoonist of My Dad Is Dracula. Jason played an early version of this game at Alaska Robotics Comics Camp this spring, and really liked it!

So I said, “Do you want to help me make it?” And so he has! It was his idea to make all the characters fun little animals, and I think it adds a ton of charm.

Because this edition is limited-run, it has been incredibly labor-intensive to make! The boxes and cards were made by a game factory in the usual fashion, but separately. The blank tiles were made by a woodworker dude out of Connecticut. For each game, we have had to:

Cut a piece of plastic and install the box window
Paint all the tiles, hundreds at a time
Apply a sticker to both sides of every tile
Apply stickers to the box (we couldn’t get the box back printed in time, so the whole back side of the box is a sticker too)
Apply the “Nutrition Facts” sticker, which was a late suggestion by my kid that I just had to run with
Fold up the rule sheet (they come from the printer as big strips of paper)
Put all the components into the box and seal it all up

I knew it would be a lot of work and would require some inefficient, expensive compromises AND I WAS RIGHT. But the final product is turning out great, which is the important thing!!

I will have 50 copies with me (if all goes well) at PAX, and then between now and the holidays we will be putting together additional copies to round out this first edition.

I will announce additional copies on Patreon first, once they are available online!! And here too, naturally, before long.

You can also sign up here if you’d like me to email you once the game is available online!

Comic Transcripts

#1071; Old Dog, Oldest Trick

— October 24th, 2014

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