#938; In which a Dog’s got a Mouth

Comic Transcripts

[[A faintly disgruntled-looking man stares into the distance. An unruly mane of hair protrudes from both sides of his wide-brimmed hat, which is pulled low over his forehead. His hands are shoved into the pockets of his coat, which he wears open over a double-breasted jacket or vest. His trousers may be tucked into the top of riding boots. He unquestionably sports a neckerchief. Behind him, a dog sits erect on its haunches, front paws held obediently in the air before it. Its shiny, dark coat and pointy ears resemble those of a Doberman Pinscher, although its muzzle and neck are shorter, more like a Rottweiler’s.]]
Man: You know what I want? Here’s what I want. I want, when you report a phone stolen, to be able to call up the provider and have them REMOTELY EXPLODE that device.
Dog: But wouldn’t having that capability leave open the door to abuse? Someone could hack in and blow up your phone! Or blow up a phone after selling it on the secondary market! I think it’s a pretty bad idea.
[[The man turns to face the dog, then silently turns away again.]]
Man: Some days I really regret asking that genie to give you the power of speech.
Dog: B-but then you wouldn’t get to hear all my OPINIONS!

{{header: think back to WONDERMARK.COM }}
{{alt-text: Wish number two was for there not to be a wish number three. “This is all I need,” he said, as the light of language comprehension slowly crept like a rising dawn across Buster’s big brown eyes. “This is all I need, forever.”}}

#938; In which a Dog’s got a Mouth transcribed by in

[[A faintly disgruntled-looking man stares into the distance. An unruly mane of hair protrudes from both sides of his wide-brimmed hat, which is pulled low over his forehead. His hands are shoved into the pockets of his coat, which he wears open over a double-breasted jacket or vest. His trousers may be tucked into the top of riding boots. He unquestionably sports a neckerchief. Behind him, a dog sits erect on its haunches, front paws held obediently in the air before it. Its shiny, dark coat and pointy ears resemble those of a Doberman Pinscher, although its muzzle and neck are shorter, more like a Rottweiler's.]]
Man: You know what I want? Here's what I want. I want, when you report a phone stolen, to be able to call up the provider and have them REMOTELY EXPLODE that device.
Dog: But wouldn't having that capability leave open the door to abuse? Someone could hack in and blow up your phone! Or blow up a phone after selling it on the secondary market! I think it's a pretty bad idea.
[[The man turns to face the dog, then silently turns away again.]]
Man: Some days I really regret asking that genie to give you the power of speech.
Dog: B-but then you wouldn't get to hear all my OPINIONS!

{{header: think back to WONDERMARK.COM }}
{{alt-text: Wish number two was for there not to be a wish number three. "This is all I need," he said, as the light of language comprehension slowly crept like a rising dawn across Buster's big brown eyes. "This is all I need, forever."}}

Wish number two was for there not to be a wish number three. ''This is all I need,'' he said, as the light of language comprehension slowly crept like a rising dawn across Buster's big brown eyes. ''This is all I need, forever.''

#938; In which a Dog’s got a Mouth

— May 17th, 2013

[ Tags: consequences, humanized animals, technology ] Permalink: https://wondermark.com/c/938/

Buy a Print

The past few weeks have been a frenzy of assembling the very laborious, very bespoke first print run of NOODLE BATTLE, the puzzle game I am releasing this weekend at PAX West in Seattle!

PAX has an event called the PNW Tabletop Game Market (Saturday night ONLY), which is a curated selection of short-run games from local designers. As I’ve mentioned in this space before, I applied for a space in this fall’s event mainly as a way to force myself to finish a new game. And here it is!

The drawings are all by Jason Poland, good pal and cartoonist of My Dad Is Dracula. Jason played an early version of this game at Alaska Robotics Comics Camp this spring, and really liked it!

So I said, “Do you want to help me make it?” And so he has! It was his idea to make all the characters fun little animals, and I think it adds a ton of charm.

Because this edition is limited-run, it has been incredibly labor-intensive to make! The boxes and cards were made by a game factory in the usual fashion, but separately. The blank tiles were made by a woodworker dude out of Connecticut. For each game, we have had to:

Cut a piece of plastic and install the box window
Paint all the tiles, hundreds at a time
Apply a sticker to both sides of every tile
Apply stickers to the box (we couldn’t get the box back printed in time, so the whole back side of the box is a sticker too)
Apply the “Nutrition Facts” sticker, which was a late suggestion by my kid that I just had to run with
Fold up the rule sheet (they come from the printer as big strips of paper)
Put all the components into the box and seal it all up

I knew it would be a lot of work and would require some inefficient, expensive compromises AND I WAS RIGHT. But the final product is turning out great, which is the important thing!!

I will have 50 copies with me (if all goes well) at PAX, and then between now and the holidays we will be putting together additional copies to round out this first edition.

I will announce additional copies on Patreon first, once they are available online!! And here too, naturally, before long.

You can also sign up here if you’d like me to email you once the game is available online!

Comic Transcripts

#938; In which a Dog’s got a Mouth

— May 17th, 2013

Recent blog posts