Comic Transcripts

[[A faintly disgruntled-looking man stares into the distance. An unruly mane of hair protrudes from both sides of his wide-brimmed hat, which is pulled low over his forehead. His hands are shoved into the pockets of his coat, which he wears open over a double-breasted jacket or vest. His trousers may be tucked into the top of riding boots. He unquestionably sports a neckerchief. Behind him, a dog sits erect on its haunches, front paws held obediently in the air before it. Its shiny, dark coat and pointy ears resemble those of a Doberman Pinscher, although its muzzle and neck are shorter, more like a Rottweiler’s.]]
Man: You know what I want? Here’s what I want. I want, when you report a phone stolen, to be able to call up the provider and have them REMOTELY EXPLODE that device.
Dog: But wouldn’t having that capability leave open the door to abuse? Someone could hack in and blow up your phone! Or blow up a phone after selling it on the secondary market! I think it’s a pretty bad idea.
[[The man turns to face the dog, then silently turns away again.]]
Man: Some days I really regret asking that genie to give you the power of speech.
Dog: B-but then you wouldn’t get to hear all my OPINIONS!

{{header: think back to WONDERMARK.COM }}
{{alt-text: Wish number two was for there not to be a wish number three. “This is all I need,” he said, as the light of language comprehension slowly crept like a rising dawn across Buster’s big brown eyes. “This is all I need, forever.”}}

#938; In which a Dog’s got a Mouth transcribed by in

[[A faintly disgruntled-looking man stares into the distance. An unruly mane of hair protrudes from both sides of his wide-brimmed hat, which is pulled low over his forehead. His hands are shoved into the pockets of his coat, which he wears open over a double-breasted jacket or vest. His trousers may be tucked into the top of riding boots. He unquestionably sports a neckerchief. Behind him, a dog sits erect on its haunches, front paws held obediently in the air before it. Its shiny, dark coat and pointy ears resemble those of a Doberman Pinscher, although its muzzle and neck are shorter, more like a Rottweiler’s.]]
Man: You know what I want? Here’s what I want. I want, when you report a phone stolen, to be able to call up the provider and have them REMOTELY EXPLODE that device.
Dog: But wouldn’t having that capability leave open the door to abuse? Someone could hack in and blow up your phone! Or blow up a phone after selling it on the secondary market! I think it’s a pretty bad idea.
[[The man turns to face the dog, then silently turns away again.]]
Man: Some days I really regret asking that genie to give you the power of speech.
Dog: B-but then you wouldn’t get to hear all my OPINIONS!

{{header: think back to WONDERMARK.COM }}
{{alt-text: Wish number two was for there not to be a wish number three. “This is all I need,” he said, as the light of language comprehension slowly crept like a rising dawn across Buster’s big brown eyes. “This is all I need, forever.”}}

#938; In which a Dog’s got a Mouth transcribed by in

[[A faintly disgruntled-looking man stares into the distance. An unruly mane of hair protrudes from both sides of his wide-brimmed hat, which is pulled low over his forehead. His hands are shoved into the pockets of his coat, which he wears open over a double-breasted jacket or vest. His trousers may be tucked into the top of riding boots. He unquestionably sports a neckerchief. Behind him, a dog sits erect on its haunches, front paws held obediently in the air before it. Its shiny, dark coat and pointy ears resemble those of a Doberman Pinscher, although its muzzle and neck are shorter, more like a Rottweiler's.]]
Man: You know what I want? Here's what I want. I want, when you report a phone stolen, to be able to call up the provider and have them REMOTELY EXPLODE that device.
Dog: But wouldn't having that capability leave open the door to abuse? Someone could hack in and blow up your phone! Or blow up a phone after selling it on the secondary market! I think it's a pretty bad idea.
[[The man turns to face the dog, then silently turns away again.]]
Man: Some days I really regret asking that genie to give you the power of speech.
Dog: B-but then you wouldn't get to hear all my OPINIONS!

{{header: think back to WONDERMARK.COM }}
{{alt-text: Wish number two was for there not to be a wish number three. "This is all I need," he said, as the light of language comprehension slowly crept like a rising dawn across Buster's big brown eyes. "This is all I need, forever."}}

Wish number two was for there not to be a wish number three. ''This is all I need,'' he said, as the light of language comprehension slowly crept like a rising dawn across Buster's big brown eyes. ''This is all I need, forever.''

#938; In which a Dog’s got a Mouth

  — May 17th, 2013

[ Tags: , , ]       Permalink: https://wondermark.com/c/938/

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Bolted! Fulfillment Update

May 25, 2026 by David Malki !
Photo courtesy of backer Nicola!

The vast majority of Bolted! game shipments are already shipped, but I understand if you don’t have yours yet, who cares. Here’s a progress report:

Total orders | 1052
Surveys completed | 992
Fully shipped | 946

Incomplete surveys

Obviously, if I don’t have your shipping address, I can’t ship your game! Let me know if you are missing a survey link. As new responses come in, they are rapidly added to the shipping queue.

Orders containing certain add-ons

Some of the add-ons proved more popular than expected — which is lovely! But it meant I had to reprint some stickers, make all the individual comic prints, request a shipment of books from offsite storage, etc, etc. So, any orders which contain an out-of-stock item are still waiting to ship.

All that missing stuff, though, is en route to me at this very second! So those orders will be going out pretty dang soon!

Custom items

I’ve already been in touch directly with the backers who ordered custom collages! Those will be created (and sent to you) after all the other shipments are complete. I’m excited for those, they’ll be fun! My pleasant dessert after the hearty meal of all the other orders.

Anything wrong?

I’m very grateful to the few folks who’ve contacted me to report some kind of issue with their shipment! Thankfully, problems are rare, but when they do occur, I would like to solve them. Please don’t hesitate to send me an email (replying to your shipping confirmation works great) if there’s anything about your order I can correct.

Reviews & photos

On BoardGameGeek are highly appreciated!

Unless you hate the game! You are entitled to that opinion, but please send that review directly to me instead of telling anyone else, so I can eat it and bury it in the yard and watch it grow into a twisted, gnarled tree. Or whatever!


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