Comic Transcripts

[[ A young woman is talking to her aging mother ]]
Daughter: Mom, do you have life insurance?
Mom: Oh, yes, dear.
Mom: I have extremely comprehensive coverage. It pays out different amounts depending on the circumstances of my death.

Mom: For example, if I am killed leaping from one speedboat to another
Mom: Either by the shock of hitting the water or if I am mangled by one of the propellers
Mom: The insurance pays for a memorial statue of me down at the marina
Mom: as a cautionary tale of sorts

Mom: If I am killed wrestling a bear to protect an infant, the insurance pays for one hundred bears to be killed and my body entombed in a crypt made from their bones
Mom: And naturally, if my heart explodes while I’m attempting to become the oldest woman ever to singlehandedly obliterate an entire camp of terrorists with just my wrinkled fists
Mom: the insurance will erect an obelisk in my honor that will blot out the sun

Daughter: What if you, like, die of cancer?
Mom: Why would I do that

{{header: remember WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: that would be like choosing brussels sprouts over ice cream}}

#844; The Narrowest Policy They Offer transcribed by in

[[ A young woman is talking to her aging mother ]]
Daughter: Mom, do you have life insurance?
Mom: Oh, yes, dear.
Mom: I have extremely comprehensive coverage. It pays out different amounts depending on the circumstances of my death.

Mom: For example, if I am killed leaping from one speedboat to another
Mom: Either by the shock of hitting the water or if I am mangled by one of the propellers
Mom: The insurance pays for a memorial statue of me down at the marina
Mom: as a cautionary tale of sorts

Mom: If I am killed wrestling a bear to protect an infant, the insurance pays for one hundred bears to be killed and my body entombed in a crypt made from their bones
Mom: And naturally, if my heart explodes while I'm attempting to become the oldest woman ever to singlehandedly obliterate an entire camp of terrorists with just my wrinkled fists
Mom: the insurance will erect an obelisk in my honor that will blot out the sun

Daughter: What if you, like, die of cancer?
Mom: Why would I do that

{{header: remember WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: that would be like choosing brussels sprouts over ice cream}}

that would be like choosing brussels sprouts over ice cream

#844; The Narrowest Policy They Offer

  — June 8th, 2012

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Applications open for Genius Northwest – an IRL gaming competition

May 8, 2026 by David Malki !

Last year, I participated in Genius Northwest, a gaming competition inspired by the Korean gameshow The Genius and its ilk.

It’s a reality show without the cameras — a 3-day, all-inclusive weekend retreat structured around a series of challenges and puzzles, in which personalities and dealmaking matter as much as playing games.

It’s truly a remarkable thing. I came in dead last in the competition, but I still had a great time participating.

The event is held annually in the Pacific Northwest (hence the name) and applications are now open to participate in the 2026 competition!

Learn more — and apply — at GeniusNW.com.


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