Comic Transcripts

[[Gax, Mr. Meanscary face a policeman and a victim]]
Policeman; All right, which of you kicked that dog into this man’s face? That’s against the LAW, you know!
Mr. Meanscary; It was Gax! Honest!!
Gax; It was me! Honest!!

Gax; I gave him a mighty punt! DELIBERATELY, too! I’m JUST the kind of guy who would DO something like that!
Policeman; Take it EASY! Look, I know you’re from OUT OF TOWN. Maybe you don’t know the rules! I just want you to be more careful in the future, okay?

Gax; MORE careful? I REFUSE! I will be LESS careful!
Mr. Meanscary; Officer, he DELIBERATELY hurt that dog!
Policeman; That’s ENOUGH out of YOU!
Mr. Meanscary; W-what?

[[Policeman picks up Mr. Meanscary by the top of his head and walks away from Gax]]
Policeman; Listen, you’ve been giving me the CREEPS since I came over here! Why don’t you come with me DOWNTOWN and we’ll run your warrants.
Mr. Meanscary; I want a LAWYER! You can’t DO this!
Policeman; YOU just got yourself classified as an ENEMY COMBATANT

[[Gax with thickened neck and sharp teeth in his wide mouth has sprouted two large bat-wings, leaning forward imposingly. A woman in matching hat and scarf appears opposite]]
Gax; Will NOBODY FEAR me?
Woman; [[in fear]]AIIEEE!!

[[Gax looks less imposing without his bat-wings and fangs. He speaks with interest and pride]]
Gax; YEAH! YOU’RE scared, huh?
Woman; I SAY, you DID give me quite the fright!
Gax; YEAH. . .YEAH I did

[[Gax crosses to exit, leaving the woman to stare at him]]
Gax; FINALLY! Someone who really APPRECIATES my horribleness!

[[Woman turns around and spots a turtle]]
Woman; AIIEEE!!

[[Meanwhile in a cell downtown, a man and mr. meanscare stare at each other. . .and stare. . .and stare. . .]]
Man; You SMELL nice.
Mr. Meanscary; THANK you! 😀

{{header: Everything works out at Wondermark.com}}
{{alt-text: Apparently Mr. Meanscary had outstanding warrants}}

#825; In which Gax is Scary transcribed by in

[[Gax, Mr. Meanscary face a policeman and a victim]]
Policeman; All right, which of you kicked that dog into this man's face? That's against the LAW, you know!
Mr. Meanscary; It was Gax! Honest!!
Gax; It was me! Honest!!

Gax; I gave him a mighty punt! DELIBERATELY, too! I'm JUST the kind of guy who would DO something like that!
Policeman; Take it EASY! Look, I know you're from OUT OF TOWN. Maybe you don't know the rules! I just want you to be more careful in the future, okay?

Gax; MORE careful? I REFUSE! I will be LESS careful!
Mr. Meanscary; Officer, he DELIBERATELY hurt that dog!
Policeman; That's ENOUGH out of YOU!
Mr. Meanscary; W-what?

[[Policeman picks up Mr. Meanscary by the top of his head and walks away from Gax]]
Policeman; Listen, you've been giving me the CREEPS since I came over here! Why don't you come with me DOWNTOWN and we'll run your warrants.
Mr. Meanscary; I want a LAWYER! You can't DO this!
Policeman; YOU just got yourself classified as an ENEMY COMBATANT

[[Gax with thickened neck and sharp teeth in his wide mouth has sprouted two large bat-wings, leaning forward imposingly. A woman in matching hat and scarf appears opposite]]
Gax; Will NOBODY FEAR me?
Woman; [[in fear]]AIIEEE!!

[[Gax looks less imposing without his bat-wings and fangs. He speaks with interest and pride]]
Gax; YEAH! YOU'RE scared, huh?
Woman; I SAY, you DID give me quite the fright!
Gax; YEAH. . .YEAH I did

[[Gax crosses to exit, leaving the woman to stare at him]]
Gax; FINALLY! Someone who really APPRECIATES my horribleness!

[[Woman turns around and spots a turtle]]
Woman; AIIEEE!!

[[Meanwhile in a cell downtown, a man and mr. meanscare stare at each other. . .and stare. . .and stare. . .]]
Man; You SMELL nice.
Mr. Meanscary; THANK you! :D

{{header: Everything works out at Wondermark.com}}
{{alt-text: Apparently Mr. Meanscary had outstanding warrants}}

Apparently Mr Meanscary had outstanding warrants.

The End. (This story started here.) Next week: back to one-shots!

My newest game: Noodle Battle! At PAX!

The past few weeks have been a frenzy of assembling the very laborious, very bespoke first print run of NOODLE BATTLE, the puzzle game I am releasing this weekend at PAX West in Seattle!

PAX has an event called the PNW Tabletop Game Market (Saturday night ONLY), which is a curated selection of short-run games from local designers. As I’ve mentioned in this space before, I applied for a space in this fall’s event mainly as a way to force myself to finish a new game. And here it is!

The drawings are all by Jason Poland, good pal and cartoonist of My Dad Is Dracula. Jason played an early version of this game at Alaska Robotics Comics Camp this spring, and really liked it!

So I said, “Do you want to help me make it?” And so he has! It was his idea to make all the characters fun little animals, and I think it adds a ton of charm.

Because this edition is limited-run, it has been incredibly labor-intensive to make! The boxes and cards were made by a game factory in the usual fashion, but separately. The blank tiles were made by a woodworker dude out of Connecticut. For each game, we have had to:

  • Cut a piece of plastic and install the box window
  • Paint all the tiles, hundreds at a time
  • Apply a sticker to both sides of every tile
  • Apply stickers to the box (we couldn’t get the box back printed in time, so the whole back side of the box is a sticker too)
  • Apply the “Nutrition Facts” sticker, which was a late suggestion by my kid that I just had to run with
  • Fold up the rule sheet (they come from the printer as big strips of paper)
  • Put all the components into the box and seal it all up

I knew it would be a lot of work and would require some inefficient, expensive compromises AND I WAS RIGHT. But the final product is turning out great, which is the important thing!!

I will have 50 copies with me (if all goes well) at PAX, and then between now and the holidays we will be putting together additional copies to round out this first edition.

I will announce additional copies on Patreon first, once they are available online!! And here too, naturally, before long.

You can also sign up here if you’d like me to email you once the game is available online!


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