Comic Transcripts

#810; The Evaluation of Wishes

[[The Fisherman is speaking to Woman #1]]
Fisherman: You’re the smartest person I know… what wish should I ask for the one-fifth starhorse?
Woman#1: How about a million misshapen, five-headed dollar bills? So you might end up with regular ones?
Fisherman: Bluh. Good luck getting that to work out the way I want.

[[The Fisherman is speaking to Man]]
Man: If you ask for gold, you get sulfur? Dude, ask for dubnium. You’ll probably end up with scandium, which sells for thirty grand a pound!
Fisherman: Hmmm Suddenly flooding the market with scandium sounds like a great way to get on an FBI watch list

[[The Fisherman is speaking to Woman #2]]
Woman #2: You should ask for the world to be at war. Surely only a fifth of the world being at war would be a gross improvement.
Fisherman: Oh, surely nothing bad could come of asking a magical horsoid with undefinable powers for the entire world to be at war.

[[The Fisherman is speaking to the Horse Head under glass]]
Fisherman: Now look, before we move forward, could you give me the probable results for several potential wishes?
Horse Head: Only if it is your wish that I do so and if it is, I warn you do not trust the answers.

{header: WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: How could you even fence all that scandium?}}

#810; The Evaluation of Wishes transcribed by in

#810; The Evaluation of Wishes

[[The Fisherman is speaking to Woman #1]]
Fisherman: You’re the smartest person I know… what wish should I ask for the one-fifth starhorse?
Woman#1: How about a million misshapen, five-headed dollar bills? So you might end up with regular ones?
Fisherman: Bluh. Good luck getting that to work out the way I want.

[[The Fisherman is speaking to Man]]
Man: If you ask for gold, you get sulfur? Dude, ask for dubnium. You’ll probably end up with scandium, which sells for thirty grand a pound!
Fisherman: Hmmm Suddenly flooding the market with scandium sounds like a great way to get on an FBI watch list

[[The Fisherman is speaking to Woman #2]]
Woman #2: You should ask for the world to be at war. Surely only a fifth of the world being at war would be a gross improvement.
Fisherman: Oh, surely nothing bad could come of asking a magical horsoid with undefinable powers for the entire world to be at war.

[[The Fisherman is speaking to the Horse Head under glass]]
Fisherman: Now look, before we move forward, could you give me the probable results for several potential wishes?
Horse Head: Only if it is your wish that I do so and if it is, I warn you do not trust the answers.

{header: WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: How could you even fence all that scandium?}}

#810; The Evaluation of Wishes transcribed by in

#810; The Evaluation of Wishes

[[The Fisherman is speaking to Woman #1]]
Fisherman: You're the smartest person I know... what wish should I ask for the one-fifth starhorse?
Woman#1: How about a million misshapen, five-headed dollar bills? So you might end up with regular ones?
Fisherman: Bluh. Good luck getting that to work out the way I want.

[[The Fisherman is speaking to Man]]
Man: If you ask for gold, you get sulfur? Dude, ask for dubnium. You'll probably end up with scandium, which sells for thirty grand a pound!
Fisherman: Hmmm Suddenly flooding the market with scandium sounds like a great way to get on an FBI watch list

[[The Fisherman is speaking to Woman #2]]
Woman #2: You should ask for the world to be at war. Surely only a fifth of the world being at war would be a gross improvement.
Fisherman: Oh, surely nothing bad could come of asking a magical horsoid with undefinable powers for the entire world to be at war.

[[The Fisherman is speaking to the Horse Head under glass]]
Fisherman: Now look, before we move forward, could you give me the probable results for several potential wishes?
Horse Head: Only if it is your wish that I do so and if it is, I warn you do not trust the answers.

{header: WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: How could you even fence all that scandium?}}

How could you even fence all that scandium?

Part 3 of our tale. Continued from Part 1 / Part 2
Thanks to Marskman Steven L. for the dubnium tip.

My newest game: Noodle Battle! At PAX!

The past few weeks have been a frenzy of assembling the very laborious, very bespoke first print run of NOODLE BATTLE, the puzzle game I am releasing this weekend at PAX West in Seattle!

PAX has an event called the PNW Tabletop Game Market (Saturday night ONLY), which is a curated selection of short-run games from local designers. As I’ve mentioned in this space before, I applied for a space in this fall’s event mainly as a way to force myself to finish a new game. And here it is!

The drawings are all by Jason Poland, good pal and cartoonist of My Dad Is Dracula. Jason played an early version of this game at Alaska Robotics Comics Camp this spring, and really liked it!

So I said, “Do you want to help me make it?” And so he has! It was his idea to make all the characters fun little animals, and I think it adds a ton of charm.

Because this edition is limited-run, it has been incredibly labor-intensive to make! The boxes and cards were made by a game factory in the usual fashion, but separately. The blank tiles were made by a woodworker dude out of Connecticut. For each game, we have had to:

  • Cut a piece of plastic and install the box window
  • Paint all the tiles, hundreds at a time
  • Apply a sticker to both sides of every tile
  • Apply stickers to the box (we couldn’t get the box back printed in time, so the whole back side of the box is a sticker too)
  • Apply the “Nutrition Facts” sticker, which was a late suggestion by my kid that I just had to run with
  • Fold up the rule sheet (they come from the printer as big strips of paper)
  • Put all the components into the box and seal it all up

I knew it would be a lot of work and would require some inefficient, expensive compromises AND I WAS RIGHT. But the final product is turning out great, which is the important thing!!

I will have 50 copies with me (if all goes well) at PAX, and then between now and the holidays we will be putting together additional copies to round out this first edition.

I will announce additional copies on Patreon first, once they are available online!! And here too, naturally, before long.

You can also sign up here if you’d like me to email you once the game is available online!


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