#767; The Old Farmer’s Lament

Comic Transcripts

A farmer stands in front of a worker who is tending to a fruit tree. The farmer speaks to us, the viewer.

FARMER:
Halloween has gotten too corporate! Big Candy pushes its sugar-laden garbage as the only sensible choice compared to razor-bladed apples!

Another example of big business using its marketing muscle to destroy the small entrepreneur!

Well, guess what, Nestle? We only use genuine U.S. steel in our razor blades!

Each blade is lovingly tied to an emerging springtime blossom so that the apple grows around the blade seamlessly! Some things are still done by hand!

[He takes a bite of the apple, which CRUNCHES.] Ow! Aah!!

[Blood is now running down his chin.] Delicious!

#767; The Old Farmer’s Lament transcribed by in

A farmer stands in front of a worker who is tending to a fruit tree. The farmer speaks to us, the viewer.

FARMER:
Halloween has gotten too corporate! Big Candy pushes its sugar-laden garbage as the only sensible choice compared to razor-bladed apples!

Another example of big business using its marketing muscle to destroy the small entrepreneur!

Well, guess what, Nestle? We only use genuine U.S. steel in our razor blades!

Each blade is lovingly tied to an emerging springtime blossom so that the apple grows around the blade seamlessly! Some things are still done by hand!

[He takes a bite of the apple, which CRUNCHES.] Ow! Aah!!

[Blood is now running down his chin.] Delicious!

#767; The Old Farmer’s Lament transcribed by in

In addition to buying things directly from me, the normal way, my game Bolted! is also now available on Amazon dot com.

On that famous website, you can also get the Creature-Crafting Magnets Set, which is made of the same artwork from the game, but is just a weird little trinket (not a playable game).

My kiddo made the elaborate version below to show off just how many magnets you get in the set (it’s 150 pieces in all — this isn’t even all of them).

Also now on Amazon is my set of Multi-Purpose Greeting Cards — a full dozen cards with envelopes in a fancy, unbranded, foil-stamped box!

Event alert!

I’ll also be showing off Bolted! at Greenwood Games, an event in Seattle this Saturday:

Greenwood Games is a free, all-ages community game event that invites players to spend the afternoon walking Greenwood Avenue from 65th to 80th, collecting clues, cracking puzzles, and discovering games made right here in Washington.

Think of it as Pride Hop, ArtWalk, and the Gumshoe all rolled into one, except the whole thing is built around games and puzzles.

Local game designers will be set up at different places along Greenwood Avenue in Phinney Ridge (near Ballard). My specific spot will be the “Holy Mountain Phinney Ridge Taproom”. All the information about all the different games & venues is on the website!

(If you’re in Seattle generally but not free tomorrow, Bolted! is also stocked at Blue Highway Games in Queen Anne.)

Next week, I’ll be at Gen Con! I personally will be hanging with my buddy Sam Logan at BFE Webcomics, booth #1217… but I have it on good authority that copies of Bolted! will be available at the CRWN Studios booth, #2549.

Visit one booth! Then the other! The order…is up to you.