BRIGHAM: Oh, man. Too much Thanksgiving turkey.
About to fall into a TRYPTOPHAN COMA!

[[SGT. MITCHELL enters, hands BRIGHAM a slip of paper.]]
BRIGHAM: What’s this?
MITCHELL: You get one written warning.
BRIGHAM: About…?
MITCHELL: The staleness of your wisecracks.

BRIGHAM: Wh–what am I being warned will HAPPEN?
MITCHELL: This is our Humor Enforcement Agent, Officer Snapwelter.
[[SNAPWELTER is a squid, wearing a policeman’s helmet and sitting in a metal canister in a wheeled wicker carriage.]]

[[BRIGHAM watches MITCHELL leave, looking away from SNAPWELTER.]]

BRIGHAM: Hey, if you’re so worried about stuff being STALE, you need to look into UNCLE BOB’S FRUITCAKE!
[[Tentacles reach for him as he speaks.]]

{{Header: in accordance with WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{Alt-text: Hey, Bob, that fruitcake was great!! AS A DOORSTOP!!!}}

#574; There Must be Rules transcribed by in

BRIGHAM: Oh, man. Too much Thanksgiving turkey.
About to fall into a TRYPTOPHAN COMA!

[[SGT. MITCHELL enters, hands BRIGHAM a slip of paper.]]
BRIGHAM: What’s this?
MITCHELL: You get one written warning.
BRIGHAM: About…?
MITCHELL: The staleness of your wisecracks.

[[BRIGHAM watches MITCHELL leave, looking away from SNAPWELTER.]]

BRIGHAM: Hey, if you’re so worried about stuff being STALE, you need to look into UNCLE BOB’S FRUITCAKE!
[[Tentacles reach for him as he speaks.]]

{{Header: in accordance with WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{Alt-text: Hey, Bob, that fruitcake was great!! AS A DOORSTOP!!!}}

#574; There Must be Rules transcribed by in

BRIGHAM: Oh, man. Too much Thanksgiving turkey.
About to fall into a TRYPTOPHAN COMA!

[[SGT. MITCHELL enters, hands BRIGHAM a slip of paper.]]
BRIGHAM: What's this?
MITCHELL: You get one written warning.
BRIGHAM: About...?
MITCHELL: The staleness of your wisecracks.

BRIGHAM: Wh--what am I being warned will HAPPEN?
MITCHELL: This is our Humor Enforcement Agent, Officer Snapwelter.
[[SNAPWELTER is a squid, wearing a policeman's helmet and sitting in a metal canister in a wheeled wicker carriage.]]

[[BRIGHAM watches MITCHELL leave, looking away from SNAPWELTER.]]

BRIGHAM: Hey, if you're so worried about stuff being STALE, you need to look into UNCLE BOB'S FRUITCAKE!
[[Tentacles reach for him as he speaks.]]

{{Header: in accordance with WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{Alt-text: Hey, Bob, that fruitcake was great!! AS A DOORSTOP!!!}}

Hey Bob, that fruitcake was great!! AS A DOORSTOP!!!

#574; There Must be Rules

— November 27th, 2009

[ Tags: annoyances, attack, holidays, solutions ] Permalink: https://wondermark.com/c/574/

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Applications open for Genius Northwest – an IRL gaming competition

May 8, 2026 by David Malki !

Last year, I participated in Genius Northwest, a gaming competition inspired by the Korean gameshow The Genius and its ilk.

It’s a reality show without the cameras — a 3-day, all-inclusive weekend retreat structured around a series of challenges and puzzles, in which personalities and dealmaking matter as much as playing games.

It’s truly a remarkable thing. I came in dead last in the competition, but I still had a great time participating.

The event is held annually in the Pacific Northwest (hence the name) and applications are now open to participate in the 2026 competition!

Learn more — and apply — at GeniusNW.com.

Comic Transcripts

#574; There Must be Rules

— November 27th, 2009

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