Comic Transcripts

[[A small ape accosts a couple.]]
JOHN: What in the holy–
APE: Do not be alarmed! I am from your future!
I was sent on a research mission into the past, but my CHRONOSHIP has broken down!

APE: As a scholar of your language, customs and technology, I have learned enough in three days to fill dozens of textbooks back home.
Now I seek only a few small papers of your current money to buy replacement parts for my craft.
Anticipating that this might happen, we were careful to build the chronoship out of parts from a 1981 Datsun 280ZX.
Please, friends…may I trouble you for a single dollar toward my goal?

MARY: Don’t do it, John, he’s just going to spend it on crack.
APE: MADAM DO NOT BE ABSURD
YOUR CRACK IS BUT BUTTERSCOTCH COMPARED TO MY CRACK AT HOME

{{Header: come home to WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{Alt-text: My wife Oogbgha has a recipe that will set your very veins afire}}

#496; In which an Ape is stranded transcribed by in

[[A small ape accosts a couple.]]
JOHN: What in the holy–
APE: Do not be alarmed! I am from your future!
I was sent on a research mission into the past, but my CHRONOSHIP has broken down!

APE: As a scholar of your language, customs and technology, I have learned enough in three days to fill dozens of textbooks back home.
Now I seek only a few small papers of your current money to buy replacement parts for my craft.
Anticipating that this might happen, we were careful to build the chronoship out of parts from a 1981 Datsun 280ZX.
Please, friends…may I trouble you for a single dollar toward my goal?

MARY: Don’t do it, John, he’s just going to spend it on crack.
APE: MADAM DO NOT BE ABSURD
YOUR CRACK IS BUT BUTTERSCOTCH COMPARED TO MY CRACK AT HOME

{{Header: come home to WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{Alt-text: My wife Oogbgha has a recipe that will set your very veins afire}}

#496; In which an Ape is stranded transcribed by in

[[A small ape accosts a couple.]]
JOHN: What in the holy--
APE: Do not be alarmed! I am from your future!
I was sent on a research mission into the past, but my CHRONOSHIP has broken down!

APE: As a scholar of your language, customs and technology, I have learned enough in three days to fill dozens of textbooks back home.
Now I seek only a few small papers of your current money to buy replacement parts for my craft.
Anticipating that this might happen, we were careful to build the chronoship out of parts from a 1981 Datsun 280ZX.
Please, friends...may I trouble you for a single dollar toward my goal?

MARY: Don't do it, John, he's just going to spend it on crack.
APE: MADAM DO NOT BE ABSURD
YOUR CRACK IS BUT BUTTERSCOTCH COMPARED TO MY CRACK AT HOME

{{Header: come home to WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{Alt-text: My wife Oogbgha has a recipe that will set your very veins afire}}

My wife Oogbgha has a recipe that will set your very veins afire

#496; In which an Ape is stranded

  — March 10th, 2009

[ Tags: , , , ]       Permalink: https://wondermark.com/c/496/

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Applications open for Genius Northwest – an IRL gaming competition

May 8, 2026 by David Malki !

Last year, I participated in Genius Northwest, a gaming competition inspired by the Korean gameshow The Genius and its ilk.

It’s a reality show without the cameras — a 3-day, all-inclusive weekend retreat structured around a series of challenges and puzzles, in which personalities and dealmaking matter as much as playing games.

It’s truly a remarkable thing. I came in dead last in the competition, but I still had a great time participating.

The event is held annually in the Pacific Northwest (hence the name) and applications are now open to participate in the 2026 competition!

Learn more — and apply — at GeniusNW.com.


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