Comic Transcripts

RANDOLPH: I LIKE these novelty scissors, but…
Why is the price so much HIGHER than in the ads?
BEN: That’s because the advertised price includes a REBATE!

BEN: To claim it, all you have to do is send in your original receipt, a printout of a web form, and the UPC code from the packaging.
We’re hoping you won’t bother! So we won’t have to pay you!

RANDOLPH: What about this one? Does IT have a rebate too?
BEN: It sure DOES!
With this one, even if you DO send it in, we’ll conveniently “lose” your original UPC and claim we never got it.
“Nothing we can do! Must have been the post office!”
RANDOLPH: You would DO that?
BEN: What reason do we have NOT to?

RANDOLPH: Is THIS one any different?
BEN: THAT rebate is issued as a PREPAID VISA CARD.
You can use it a few times–until you’re stuck with a card that’s got $1.18 left on it. THEN, the card EXPIRES!
BASICALLY, we make it SO HARD for you to spend YOUR OWN MONEY, that we get to KEEP some of it!
As a REWARD!

BEN: And then there’s THIS one.
This is our most popular rebate.
Instead of DOLLARS, it’s paid in EXCRUCIATING GROIN-KICKS, administered by Hugo here.
HUGO: Hello.

RANDOLPH: People really choose that one?
BEN: Well, sure, given the options.

{{Header: whatta great deal at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{Alt-text: stymied at the novelty-scissor emporium!}}

#471; In which Bill ends up paying Full Price transcribed by in

RANDOLPH: I LIKE these novelty scissors, but…
Why is the price so much HIGHER than in the ads?
BEN: That’s because the advertised price includes a REBATE!

BEN: To claim it, all you have to do is send in your original receipt, a printout of a web form, and the UPC code from the packaging.
We’re hoping you won’t bother! So we won’t have to pay you!

RANDOLPH: What about this one? Does IT have a rebate too?
BEN: It sure DOES!
With this one, even if you DO send it in, we’ll conveniently “lose” your original UPC and claim we never got it.
“Nothing we can do! Must have been the post office!”
RANDOLPH: You would DO that?
BEN: What reason do we have NOT to?

RANDOLPH: Is THIS one any different?
BEN: THAT rebate is issued as a PREPAID VISA CARD.
You can use it a few times–until you’re stuck with a card that’s got $1.18 left on it. THEN, the card EXPIRES!
BASICALLY, we make it SO HARD for you to spend YOUR OWN MONEY, that we get to KEEP some of it!
As a REWARD!

BEN: And then there’s THIS one.
This is our most popular rebate.
Instead of DOLLARS, it’s paid in EXCRUCIATING GROIN-KICKS, administered by Hugo here.
HUGO: Hello.

RANDOLPH: People really choose that one?
BEN: Well, sure, given the options.

{{Header: whatta great deal at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{Alt-text: stymied at the novelty-scissor emporium!}}

#471; In which Bill ends up paying Full Price transcribed by in

RANDOLPH: I LIKE these novelty scissors, but...
Why is the price so much HIGHER than in the ads?
BEN: That's because the advertised price includes a REBATE!

BEN: To claim it, all you have to do is send in your original receipt, a printout of a web form, and the UPC code from the packaging.
We're hoping you won't bother! So we won't have to pay you!

RANDOLPH: What about this one? Does IT have a rebate too?
BEN: It sure DOES!
With this one, even if you DO send it in, we'll conveniently "lose" your original UPC and claim we never got it.
"Nothing we can do! Must have been the post office!"
RANDOLPH: You would DO that?
BEN: What reason do we have NOT to?

RANDOLPH: Is THIS one any different?
BEN: THAT rebate is issued as a PREPAID VISA CARD.
You can use it a few times--until you're stuck with a card that's got $1.18 left on it. THEN, the card EXPIRES!
BASICALLY, we make it SO HARD for you to spend YOUR OWN MONEY, that we get to KEEP some of it!
As a REWARD!

BEN: And then there's THIS one.
This is our most popular rebate.
Instead of DOLLARS, it's paid in EXCRUCIATING GROIN-KICKS, administered by Hugo here.
HUGO: Hello.

RANDOLPH: People really choose that one?
BEN: Well, sure, given the options.

{{Header: whatta great deal at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{Alt-text: stymied at the novelty-scissor emporium!}}

stymied at the novelty-scissor emporium!

#471; In which Bill ends up paying Full Price

  — December 12th, 2008

[ Tags: , , , ]       Permalink: https://wondermark.com/c/471/

Buy a Print

New ways to get Bolted!

July 24, 2026 by David Malki !

In addition to buying things directly from me, the normal way, my game Bolted! is also now available on Amazon dot com.

On that famous website, you can also get the Creature-Crafting Magnets Set, which is made of the same artwork from the game, but is just a weird little trinket (not a playable game).

My kiddo made the elaborate version below to show off just how many magnets you get in the set (it’s 150 pieces in all — this isn’t even all of them).

Also now on Amazon is my set of Multi-Purpose Greeting Cards — a full dozen cards with envelopes in a fancy, unbranded, foil-stamped box!

Event alert!

I’ll also be showing off Bolted! at Greenwood Games, an event in Seattle this Saturday:

Greenwood Games is a free, all-ages community game event that invites players to spend the afternoon walking Greenwood Avenue from 65th to 80th, collecting clues, cracking puzzles, and discovering games made right here in Washington.

Think of it as Pride Hop, ArtWalk, and the Gumshoe all rolled into one,  except the whole thing is built around games and puzzles.​

Local game designers will be set up at different places along Greenwood Avenue in Phinney Ridge (near Ballard). My specific spot will be the “Holy Mountain Phinney Ridge Taproom”. All the information about all the different games & venues is on the website!

(If you’re in Seattle generally but not free tomorrow, Bolted! is also stocked at Blue Highway Games in Queen Anne.)

Next week, I’ll be at Gen Con! I personally will be hanging with my buddy Sam Logan at BFE Webcomics, booth #1217… but I have it on good authority that copies of Bolted! will be available at the CRWN Studios booth, #2549.

Visit one booth! Then the other! The order…is up to you.


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