Comic Transcripts

[[A car stands at rest in front of a country house, its alarms blaring]]
Car: <>

[[Nearby, a gentleman with a bowler hat and cane glances at the car.]]
Gentleman: You know, that’s really annoying. Could you please cut it out.
Car: B-B-But I’m being STOLEN!
Gentleman: You’re NOT being stolen.
Gentleman: Somebody WALKED BY you. Get over it.

[[The view closes, framing the torso of the man and the car’s front fender. The car appears forlorn.]]
Car: I-I’m NOT?
Car: But what if I WAS? What if I was being stolen?
Gentleman: If you were being stolen I would throw a party. I would throw a freaking PARTY.
Gentleman: <> That annoying car is being stolen!
Gentleman: <> Hooray!

{{header: party on at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: i just wanted someone to NOTICE me}}

#286; In which a Car considers a Hypothetical transcribed by in

[[A car stands at rest in front of a country house, its alarms blaring]]
Car: <>

[[Nearby, a gentleman with a bowler hat and cane glances at the car.]]
Gentleman: You know, that's really annoying. Could you please cut it out.
Car: B-B-But I'm being STOLEN!
Gentleman: You're NOT being stolen.
Gentleman: Somebody WALKED BY you. Get over it.

[[The view closes, framing the torso of the man and the car's front fender. The car appears forlorn.]]
Car: I-I'm NOT?
Car: But what if I WAS? What if I was being stolen?
Gentleman: If you were being stolen I would throw a party. I would throw a freaking PARTY.
Gentleman: <> That annoying car is being stolen!
Gentleman: <> Hooray!

{{header: party on at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: i just wanted someone to NOTICE me}}

i just wanted someone to NOTICE me

#286; In which a Car considers a Hypothetical

  — July 23rd, 2013

[ Tags: , , , ]       Permalink: https://wondermark.com/c/286b/

This Classic Wondermark was originally published in 2007, in black & white! It was colored by Carly Monardo for its inclusion in my book Clever Tricks to Stave Off Death (which has a brand-new paperback edition). The book also contains an informative sidebar about Milestones in Car-Alarm History.

Buy a Print

New ways to get Bolted!

July 24, 2026 by David Malki !

In addition to buying things directly from me, the normal way, my game Bolted! is also now available on Amazon dot com.

On that famous website, you can also get the Creature-Crafting Magnets Set, which is made of the same artwork from the game, but is just a weird little trinket (not a playable game).

My kiddo made the elaborate version below to show off just how many magnets you get in the set (it’s 150 pieces in all — this isn’t even all of them).

Also now on Amazon is my set of Multi-Purpose Greeting Cards — a full dozen cards with envelopes in a fancy, unbranded, foil-stamped box!

Event alert!

I’ll also be showing off Bolted! at Greenwood Games, an event in Seattle this Saturday:

Greenwood Games is a free, all-ages community game event that invites players to spend the afternoon walking Greenwood Avenue from 65th to 80th, collecting clues, cracking puzzles, and discovering games made right here in Washington.

Think of it as Pride Hop, ArtWalk, and the Gumshoe all rolled into one,  except the whole thing is built around games and puzzles.​

Local game designers will be set up at different places along Greenwood Avenue in Phinney Ridge (near Ballard). My specific spot will be the “Holy Mountain Phinney Ridge Taproom”. All the information about all the different games & venues is on the website!

(If you’re in Seattle generally but not free tomorrow, Bolted! is also stocked at Blue Highway Games in Queen Anne.)

Next week, I’ll be at Gen Con! I personally will be hanging with my buddy Sam Logan at BFE Webcomics, booth #1217… but I have it on good authority that copies of Bolted! will be available at the CRWN Studios booth, #2549.

Visit one booth! Then the other! The order…is up to you.


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