[[Two MEN sit at a table. One holds a glass, one holds a cigar.]]
MAN 1: Listen to this, on a bottle of Dole pineapple juice: "One of many healthy choices from Pepsico."
MAN 1: Man, I thought Dole was a big, happy pineapple-plantation kind of place! Not some corporate subsidiary of the evil Frito-Lay Empire!
MAN 2: Hey, I work for Pepsico! It's actually a really good company. They provide great benefits for employees.
MAN 1: R-really? Oh, I didn't mean -
MAN 1: D-do you really work for Pepsi?
MAN 2: Ha ha ha! No way, man!
MAN 2: But you sure were quick to change your tune when you thought it might offend me!
MAN 1: Acutally, for a second there I thought I was in the fast lane to free juice.
MAN 2: Sorry, dude, better stick to the traditional method. Writin' angry letters claimin' you found pubes in the O. J.
{{header: fresh squeezed at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: works every time}}