Comic Transcripts

[[A smartphone is on an end table. It’s balancing up on end, and speaking, so maybe it’s animate? This is unclear.]]

SMARTPHONE: Hey! HEY!

[[The phone is speaking to PORDLEY, who is trying to practice the piano. He looks up at the phone which is addressing him on its own.]]

SMARTPHONE: I can’t help but notice you’ve been holding me less. I MISS you. I miss your nimble TAPS and SWIPES.

PORDLEY: It’s because you’re a PORTAL to HORRORS! Nothing personal. It’s just…you ARE a PORTAL. And there are SO VERY MANY horrors.

SMARTPHONE: I’m a portal to EVERYTHING. Don’t you want to see GOOFS AND SPOOFS? You LOVE goofs and spoofs!

PORDLEY: I DO love goofs and spoofs.
SMARTPHONE: I’ve got SO MANY goofs and spoofs.

[[Pordley, convinced, reaches tentatively for the phone…]]

[[HORRORS ERUPT FROM THE PHONE. Of course! Of course!!!]]

{{header: log back on to WONDERMARK.COM}}

#1582; Limit Your Scream Time transcribed by in

[[A smartphone is on an end table. It's balancing up on end, and speaking, so maybe it's animate? This is unclear.]]

SMARTPHONE: Hey! HEY!

[[The phone is speaking to PORDLEY, who is trying to practice the piano. He looks up at the phone which is addressing him on its own.]]

SMARTPHONE: I can't help but notice you've been holding me less. I MISS you. I miss your nimble TAPS and SWIPES.

PORDLEY: It's because you're a PORTAL to HORRORS! Nothing personal. It's just...you ARE a PORTAL. And there are SO VERY MANY horrors.

SMARTPHONE: I'm a portal to EVERYTHING. Don't you want to see GOOFS AND SPOOFS? You LOVE goofs and spoofs!

PORDLEY: I DO love goofs and spoofs.
SMARTPHONE: I've got SO MANY goofs and spoofs.

[[Pordley, convinced, reaches tentatively for the phone…]]

[[HORRORS ERUPT FROM THE PHONE. Of course! Of course!!!]]

{{header: log back on to WONDERMARK.COM}}

This actually isn't good! Phones only show you horrors when they're VERY DEPRESSED, or at any other time

#1582; Limit Your Scream Time

  — February 12th, 2026

[ Tags: , , ]       Permalink: https://wondermark.com/c/1582/

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Bolted! Shipping is UNDERWAY

April 4, 2026 by David Malki !

Bolted! games have been shipping to backers over the last couple of weeks! The non-US orders are (mostly) done and some folks have been reporting receiving them already!

@davidmalki.com My game arrived today!! It looks gorgeous 🙂 Hope you are well 🙂

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— Lar deSouza (@lartist.bsky.social) April 2, 2026 at 2:52 PM

My US inventory of games is now in-country, but still being staged at the fulfillment centers. It’s being distributed to regional warehouses, so the actual shipping to backers happens more efficiently. I hope the bulk of US shipping will start next week.

These are what the cartons (and games) look like!

bolted! games BOLTED! GAMES (pounding the table) B O L T E D ! G A M E S

[image or embed]

— david malki ! (@davidmalki.com) April 3, 2026 at 10:37 AM

I am also waiting on the bonus cards to be finished printing! I ended up needing many more of those than I had anticipated, so I decided to have the game factory print those too, for perfect matching with the base game cards.

Most people will be receiving two separate mailings: the game itself, and “anything else” (bonus cards and/or add-ons) which will be sent by me personally.

As of today, 86% of backers have completed their surveys so far! That’s pretty good, but it’s not everyone. I know YOU PERSONALLY have already completed YOURS though, so no worries!!

We have now moved OFF of Kickstarter and ONTO BackerKit for any new orders. You can bundle a game with basically anything else I sell on that there website, it’s pretty nuts!


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