Comic Transcripts

[[The latest goods THAT YOU CANNOT EXIST WITHOUT “Take It Apart” TINKERBOX PARTS – TOOLS Shiny Sundries Designed to Rapidly Expend Your Working Capital. BEST PRICES OF THE SEASON/ENCLOSE CASH WITH ORDER
FISH GRASPERS. Expand the capability of any device with the addition of Fish Graspers. Your stove, coffeepot, tire-jack &c. will do double duty with this tool securely installed. $1.00
THE MANGLER. Should your handicrafts call for fresh bone marrow, this bench-mounted device will extract it speedily. Why pay more for store-bought? Fresh is unmatched for flavor. $3.50
COIN-PURSE GUN. A weapon to keep handy at all times of day or night. Fend off bothersome insects without danger of injury to others. Provoke comforting touches before boarding aircraft. $2.00
MOONDIAL. The best tool yet invented to ensure marital harmony. Gentlemen, hide this in the back yard and see on which days you should keep your fat mouth shut. $5.25
ROBOT SHAVER. Children and animals are not allowed in most robot competitions. Hide your treachery with this shaver – removes hair and imparts a waxy, metallic sheen. $2.00
“WOW” GADGET. What does it do? We have not been able to determine, but it looks very impressive resting casually on a desk. Appear learned to friends. $7.75
DESCRIPTIONS TAKEN FROM PRESS RELEASES – NOTHING HAS BEEN TESTED]]

{{alt-text: All outlandish claims are taken at face value because we need to fill pages with SOMETHING}}

The Tinkerer’s Handbook, Page 4 (of 8) transcribed by in

[[The latest goods THAT YOU CANNOT EXIST WITHOUT “Take It Apart” TINKERBOX PARTS – TOOLS Shiny Sundries Designed to Rapidly Expend Your Working Capital. BEST PRICES OF THE SEASON/ENCLOSE CASH WITH ORDER
FISH GRASPERS. Expand the capability of any device with the addition of Fish Graspers. Your stove, coffeepot, tire-jack &c. will do double duty with this tool securely installed. $1.00
THE MANGLER. Should your handicrafts call for fresh bone marrow, this bench-mounted device will extract it speedily. Why pay more for store-bought? Fresh is unmatched for flavor. $3.50
COIN-PURSE GUN. A weapon to keep handy at all times of day or night. Fend off bothersome insects without danger of injury to others. Provoke comforting touches before boarding aircraft. $2.00
MOONDIAL. The best tool yet invented to ensure marital harmony. Gentlemen, hide this in the back yard and see on which days you should keep your fat mouth shut. $5.25
ROBOT SHAVER. Children and animals are not allowed in most robot competitions. Hide your treachery with this shaver – removes hair and imparts a waxy, metallic sheen. $2.00
“WOW” GADGET. What does it do? We have not been able to determine, but it looks very impressive resting casually on a desk. Appear learned to friends. $7.75
DESCRIPTIONS TAKEN FROM PRESS RELEASES – NOTHING HAS BEEN TESTED]]

{{alt-text: All outlandish claims are taken at face value because we need to fill pages with SOMETHING}}

The Tinkerer’s Handbook, Page 4 (of 8) transcribed by in

[[The latest goods THAT YOU CANNOT EXIST WITHOUT "Take It Apart" TINKERBOX PARTS - TOOLS Shiny Sundries Designed to Rapidly Expend Your Working Capital. BEST PRICES OF THE SEASON/ENCLOSE CASH WITH ORDER
FISH GRASPERS. Expand the capability of any device with the addition of Fish Graspers. Your stove, coffeepot, tire-jack &c. will do double duty with this tool securely installed. $1.00
THE MANGLER. Should your handicrafts call for fresh bone marrow, this bench-mounted device will extract it speedily. Why pay more for store-bought? Fresh is unmatched for flavor. $3.50
COIN-PURSE GUN. A weapon to keep handy at all times of day or night. Fend off bothersome insects without danger of injury to others. Provoke comforting touches before boarding aircraft. $2.00
MOONDIAL. The best tool yet invented to ensure marital harmony. Gentlemen, hide this in the back yard and see on which days you should keep your fat mouth shut. $5.25
ROBOT SHAVER. Children and animals are not allowed in most robot competitions. Hide your treachery with this shaver - removes hair and imparts a waxy, metallic sheen. $2.00
"WOW" GADGET. What does it do? We have not been able to determine, but it looks very impressive resting casually on a desk. Appear learned to friends. $7.75
DESCRIPTIONS TAKEN FROM PRESS RELEASES - NOTHING HAS BEEN TESTED]]

{{alt-text: All outlandish claims are taken at face value because we need to fill pages with SOMETHING}}

All outlandish claims are taken at face value because we need to fill pages with SOMETHING

Bolted! Fulfillment Update

Photo courtesy of backer Nicola!

The vast majority of Bolted! game shipments are already shipped, but I understand if you don’t have yours yet, who cares. Here’s a progress report:

Total orders | 1052
Surveys completed | 992
Fully shipped | 946

Incomplete surveys

Obviously, if I don’t have your shipping address, I can’t ship your game! Let me know if you are missing a survey link. As new responses come in, they are rapidly added to the shipping queue.

Orders containing certain add-ons

Some of the add-ons proved more popular than expected — which is lovely! But it meant I had to reprint some stickers, make all the individual comic prints, request a shipment of books from offsite storage, etc, etc. So, any orders which contain an out-of-stock item are still waiting to ship.

All that missing stuff, though, is en route to me at this very second! So those orders will be going out pretty dang soon!

Custom items

I’ve already been in touch directly with the backers who ordered custom collages! Those will be created (and sent to you) after all the other shipments are complete. I’m excited for those, they’ll be fun! My pleasant dessert after the hearty meal of all the other orders.

Anything wrong?

I’m very grateful to the few folks who’ve contacted me to report some kind of issue with their shipment! Thankfully, problems are rare, but when they do occur, I would like to solve them. Please don’t hesitate to send me an email (replying to your shipping confirmation works great) if there’s anything about your order I can correct.

Reviews & photos

On BoardGameGeek are highly appreciated!

Unless you hate the game! You are entitled to that opinion, but please send that review directly to me instead of telling anyone else, so I can eat it and bury it in the yard and watch it grow into a twisted, gnarled tree. Or whatever!


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