Comic Transcripts

[[Three women; the woman on the left wears a black hood trimmed with fur and carries a basket on her back; the woman in the center carries a basket on her back; the woman on the right seems to be Marsha]]

Left: Ladies, have you heard? Bifton’s out! He’s thrown the yoke and drawn a dusty soda!
Center: Dunk me a drumstick! Are you crowing for dawn, or is this the straight bacon?
Right: Who is Bifton?

Left: I got it in from Alistano down at the dog creamery. Bifton got pinked by Jornavenich!
Center: Well, it’s about time! Good riddance to bad radishes!
Right: I don’t… I don’t know what any of this is
Right: Are you talking about real radishes and an actual dog creamery or is this all some kind of weird folksy idiom?

Left: Bifton’s gonna be ridin’ the upside-down turnip truck all the way to Tuscaloosa, that’s for sure.
Center: Dial HIM a pickle and call him a date.
Right: Ooh! The sudden electricity in the air suggests to me that your strange vegetable-based euphemisms have taken a turn for the vulgar!

{{header: flip a biscuit at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alttext: Before I was just confused — but now I’m titillated and confused!}}

#748; In which Marsha is lost transcribed by in

[[Three women; the woman on the left wears a black hood trimmed with fur and carries a basket on her back; the woman in the center carries a basket on her back; the woman on the right seems to be Marsha]]

Left: Ladies, have you heard? Bifton’s out! He’s thrown the yoke and drawn a dusty soda!
Center: Dunk me a drumstick! Are you crowing for dawn, or is this the straight bacon?
Right: Who is Bifton?

Left: I got it in from Alistano down at the dog creamery. Bifton got pinked by Jornavenich!
Center: Well, it’s about time! Good riddance to bad radishes!
Right: I don’t… I don’t know what any of this is
Right: Are you talking about real radishes and an actual dog creamery or is this all some kind of weird folksy idiom?

Left: Bifton’s gonna be ridin’ the upside-down turnip truck all the way to Tuscaloosa, that’s for sure.
Center: Dial HIM a pickle and call him a date.
Right: Ooh! The sudden electricity in the air suggests to me that your strange vegetable-based euphemisms have taken a turn for the vulgar!

{{header: flip a biscuit at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alttext: Before I was just confused — but now I’m titillated and confused!}}

#748; In which Marsha is lost transcribed by in

[[Three women; the woman on the left wears a black hood trimmed with fur and carries a basket on her back; the woman in the center carries a basket on her back; the woman on the right seems to be Marsha]]

Left: Ladies, have you heard? Bifton's out! He's thrown the yoke and drawn a dusty soda!
Center: Dunk me a drumstick! Are you crowing for dawn, or is this the straight bacon?
Right: Who is Bifton?

Left: I got it in from Alistano down at the dog creamery. Bifton got pinked by Jornavenich!
Center: Well, it's about time! Good riddance to bad radishes!
Right: I don't... I don't know what any of this is
Right: Are you talking about real radishes and an actual dog creamery or is this all some kind of weird folksy idiom?

Left: Bifton's gonna be ridin' the upside-down turnip truck all the way to Tuscaloosa, that's for sure.
Center: Dial HIM a pickle and call him a date.
Right: Ooh! The sudden electricity in the air suggests to me that your strange vegetable-based euphemisms have taken a turn for the vulgar!

{{header: flip a biscuit at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alttext: Before I was just confused -- but now I'm titillated and confused!}}

Before I was just confused -- but now I'm titillated AND confused!

#748; In which Marsha is lost

  — August 16th, 2011

[ Tags: , ]       Permalink: https://wondermark.com/c/748/

Buy a Print

Applications open for Genius Northwest – an IRL gaming competition

May 8, 2026 by David Malki !

Last year, I participated in Genius Northwest, a gaming competition inspired by the Korean gameshow The Genius and its ilk.

It’s a reality show without the cameras — a 3-day, all-inclusive weekend retreat structured around a series of challenges and puzzles, in which personalities and dealmaking matter as much as playing games.

It’s truly a remarkable thing. I came in dead last in the competition, but I still had a great time participating.

The event is held annually in the Pacific Northwest (hence the name) and applications are now open to participate in the 2026 competition!

Learn more — and apply — at GeniusNW.com.


Recent blog posts