#647; In which a Spoiler is alerted

Comic Transcripts

[[two men in tall hats looking at some very large birds]]
Hat man 1: Ha, that’s a weird-looking bird.
Hat man 2: Looks kind of like the bad guy from ‘Steel Agent 3’.
Hat man 1: Oh, I haven’t seen the third one. The villain is a BIRD? Isn’t it a JET LI movie?

Hat man 2: Yeah, Spoiler Alert- the villain’s this giant robot, but at the end it turns out to be a bird in a–
Hat man 1 [[interrupting]]: WHOA whoa whoa! THAT was NOT a spoiler alert!
Hat man 1: You don’t say ‘Allergy alert, this chocolate has nuts in it’ and then SHOVE it down the person’s THROAT!

Hat man 1: The purpose of a spoiler alert is to ALERT someone. To make them AWARE of the danger while there is time to AVOID it.
Hat man 1: What if I’d just gotten STEEL AGENT 3 on Netflix and was about to go home and watch it? Give me a CHANCE, dude! Allow me to STOP you if I need to!

Hat man 2: I’m sorry. I went about that whole conversation in a foolish way. I thought you would GET that there IS NO Steel Agent 3 and that I was making a dumb joke about that bird.
Hat man 1: In the last ten seconds, that bird’s opinion of both of us has dropped dramatically.

#647; In which a Spoiler is alerted transcribed by in

The vast majority of Bolted! game shipments are already shipped, but I understand if you don’t have yours yet, who cares. Here’s a progress report:

Total orders | 1052
Surveys completed | 992
Fully shipped | 946

Incomplete surveys

Obviously, if I don’t have your shipping address, I can’t ship your game! Let me know if you are missing a survey link. As new responses come in, they are rapidly added to the shipping queue.

Orders containing certain add-ons

Some of the add-ons proved more popular than expected — which is lovely! But it meant I had to reprint some stickers, make all the individual comic prints, request a shipment of books from offsite storage, etc, etc. So, any orders which contain an out-of-stock item are still waiting to ship.

All that missing stuff, though, is en route to me at this very second! So those orders will be going out pretty dang soon!

Custom items

I’ve already been in touch directly with the backers who ordered custom collages! Those will be created (and sent to you) after all the other shipments are complete. I’m excited for those, they’ll be fun! My pleasant dessert after the hearty meal of all the other orders.

Anything wrong?

I’m very grateful to the few folks who’ve contacted me to report some kind of issue with their shipment! Thankfully, problems are rare, but when they do occur, I would like to solve them. Please don’t hesitate to send me an email (replying to your shipping confirmation works great) if there’s anything about your order I can correct.

Reviews & photos

On BoardGameGeek are highly appreciated!

Unless you hate the game! You are entitled to that opinion, but please send that review directly to me instead of telling anyone else, so I can eat it and bury it in the yard and watch it grow into a twisted, gnarled tree. Or whatever!