Comic Transcripts

[[The disembodied head of Abraham Lincoln wears a top hat and monocle.]]

Lincoln: I say, old chap, I think the most undignified way to die would be to be robbed and murdered by lower-class hooligans.

[[The disembodied head of George Washington wears an identical top hat and monocle.]]

Washington: Oh, I quite agree. That would certainly be a most unfashionable way to meet one’s demise.

Lincoln: I rather think I’d prefer to be attacked by some sort of poisoned razor bees to be stung, poisoned, and lacerated to death than to be snuffed by a common poor person.

Washington: Oh certainly, certainly. Savage and gruesome deaths are very in these days You’d surely be the talk of the town for a few days after something like that.

[[The disembodied head of John Wilkes Booth holds a gun on both of them.]]

Booth: All right, guys, I get it. You’d be very ashamed to be robbed and murdered by a poor person like me. Great. Don’t care. Still going to rob and murder you both.

[[Booth now wears both top hats and both monocles.]]

Booth: Aw, yeah, I’m the cock of the walk!

{{alt-text: this tale smacks of historical inaccuracy}}

#201; Guest Comic by Miles Grover transcribed by in

[[The disembodied head of Abraham Lincoln wears a top hat and monocle.]]

Lincoln: I say, old chap, I think the most undignified way to die would be to be robbed and murdered by lower-class hooligans.

[[The disembodied head of George Washington wears an identical top hat and monocle.]]

Washington: Oh, I quite agree. That would certainly be a most unfashionable way to meet one’s demise.

Lincoln: I rather think I’d prefer to be attacked by some sort of poisoned razor bees to be stung, poisoned, and lacerated to death than to be snuffed by a common poor person.

Washington: Oh certainly, certainly. Savage and gruesome deaths are very in these days You’d surely be the talk of the town for a few days after something like that.

[[The disembodied head of John Wilkes Booth holds a gun on both of them.]]

Booth: All right, guys, I get it. You’d be very ashamed to be robbed and murdered by a poor person like me. Great. Don’t care. Still going to rob and murder you both.

[[Booth now wears both top hats and both monocles.]]

Booth: Aw, yeah, I’m the cock of the walk!

{{alt-text: this tale smacks of historical inaccuracy}}

#201; Guest Comic by Miles Grover transcribed by in

[[The disembodied head of Abraham Lincoln wears a top hat and monocle.]]

Lincoln: I say, old chap, I think the most undignified way to die would be to be robbed and murdered by lower-class hooligans.

[[The disembodied head of George Washington wears an identical top hat and monocle.]]

Washington: Oh, I quite agree. That would certainly be a most unfashionable way to meet one's demise.

Lincoln: I rather think I'd prefer to be attacked by some sort of poisoned razor bees to be stung, poisoned, and lacerated to death than to be snuffed by a common poor person.

Washington: Oh certainly, certainly. Savage and gruesome deaths are very in these days You'd surely be the talk of the town for a few days after something like that.

[[The disembodied head of John Wilkes Booth holds a gun on both of them.]]

Booth: All right, guys, I get it. You'd be very ashamed to be robbed and murdered by a poor person like me. Great. Don't care. Still going to rob and murder you both.

[[Booth now wears both top hats and both monocles.]]

Booth: Aw, yeah, I'm the cock of the walk!

{{alt-text: this tale smacks of historical inaccuracy}}

this tale smacks of historical inaccuracy

#201; Guest Comic by Miles Grover

  — July 3rd, 2006

[ Tags: , , ]       Permalink: https://wondermark.com/c/201/

Guest comic by Miles Grover of Thinkin’ Lincoln.

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My newest game: Noodle Battle! At PAX!

September 2, 2026 by David Malki !

The past few weeks have been a frenzy of assembling the very laborious, very bespoke first print run of NOODLE BATTLE, the puzzle game I am releasing this weekend at PAX West in Seattle!

PAX has an event called the PNW Tabletop Game Market (Saturday night ONLY), which is a curated selection of short-run games from local designers. As I’ve mentioned in this space before, I applied for a space in this fall’s event mainly as a way to force myself to finish a new game. And here it is!

The drawings are all by Jason Poland, good pal and cartoonist of My Dad Is Dracula. Jason played an early version of this game at Alaska Robotics Comics Camp this spring, and really liked it!

So I said, “Do you want to help me make it?” And so he has! It was his idea to make all the characters fun little animals, and I think it adds a ton of charm.

Because this edition is limited-run, it has been incredibly labor-intensive to make! The boxes and cards were made by a game factory in the usual fashion, but separately. The blank tiles were made by a woodworker dude out of Connecticut. For each game, we have had to:

  • Cut a piece of plastic and install the box window
  • Paint all the tiles, hundreds at a time
  • Apply a sticker to both sides of every tile
  • Apply stickers to the box (we couldn’t get the box back printed in time, so the whole back side of the box is a sticker too)
  • Apply the “Nutrition Facts” sticker, which was a late suggestion by my kid that I just had to run with
  • Fold up the rule sheet (they come from the printer as big strips of paper)
  • Put all the components into the box and seal it all up

I knew it would be a lot of work and would require some inefficient, expensive compromises AND I WAS RIGHT. But the final product is turning out great, which is the important thing!!

I will have 50 copies with me (if all goes well) at PAX, and then between now and the holidays we will be putting together additional copies to round out this first edition.

I will announce additional copies on Patreon first, once they are available online!! And here too, naturally, before long.

You can also sign up here if you’d like me to email you once the game is available online!


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