Comic Transcripts

Man: People are afraid to TALK these days for fear of OFFENDING someone! It’s UNBELIEVABLE!

Man: You can’t do ANYTHING without someone taking it as an INSULT!
Man: You can’t talk like you’d NORMALLY talk, full of all the invective and slurs you’d NORMALLY use, without the objects of that invective feeling belittled and dehumanized by it!

Man: You can’t even step on people’s FEET without them crying out in pain! You have to try and AVOID stepping on them at ALL if you don’t want to be accused of HURTING them! It’s MADNESS!!
Man: You can’t TRAMPLE THE MULTITUDES without a weak moan from the very bottom of the body-pile making you feel momentarily a tiny bit sheepish!!

Man: What’s the world COMING to, when you’re tacitly encouraged NOT to simply stop about wherever you like, heedless of the humanity of others? What KIND of WORLD are we CREATING??
Woman: One where —
Man: The QUESTION was OBVIOUSLY RHETORICAL

{{header: toughen up at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: It’s like you can’t even unhinge your jaw and let the dark pour out unheeded into the world at large anymore, without the all-consuming void gushing from your black center devouring the stars and the birds and the sun and the elements that combine to make love possible!}}

#1071; Old Dog, Oldest Trick transcribed by in

Man: People are afraid to TALK these days for fear of OFFENDING someone! It’s UNBELIEVABLE!

Man: You can’t do ANYTHING without someone taking it as an INSULT!
Man: You can’t talk like you’d NORMALLY talk, full of all the invective and slurs you’d NORMALLY use, without the objects of that invective feeling belittled and dehumanized by it!

Man: You can’t even step on people’s FEET without them crying out in pain! You have to try and AVOID stepping on them at ALL if you don’t want to be accused of HURTING them! It’s MADNESS!!
Man: You can’t TRAMPLE THE MULTITUDES without a weak moan from the very bottom of the body-pile making you feel momentarily a tiny bit sheepish!!

Man: What’s the world COMING to, when you’re tacitly encouraged NOT to simply stop about wherever you like, heedless of the humanity of others? What KIND of WORLD are we CREATING??
Woman: One where —
Man: The QUESTION was OBVIOUSLY RHETORICAL

{{header: toughen up at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: It’s like you can’t even unhinge your jaw and let the dark pour out unheeded into the world at large anymore, without the all-consuming void gushing from your black center devouring the stars and the birds and the sun and the elements that combine to make love possible!}}

#1071; Old Dog, Oldest Trick transcribed by in

Man: People are afraid to TALK these days for fear of OFFENDING someone! It's UNBELIEVABLE!

Man: You can't do ANYTHING without someone taking it as an INSULT!
Man: You can't talk like you'd NORMALLY talk, full of all the invective and slurs you'd NORMALLY use, without the objects of that invective feeling belittled and dehumanized by it!

Man: You can't even step on people's FEET without them crying out in pain! You have to try and AVOID stepping on them at ALL if you don't want to be accused of HURTING them! It's MADNESS!!
Man: You can't TRAMPLE THE MULTITUDES without a weak moan from the very bottom of the body-pile making you feel momentarily a tiny bit sheepish!!

Man: What's the world COMING to, when you're tacitly encouraged NOT to simply stop about wherever you like, heedless of the humanity of others? What KIND of WORLD are we CREATING??
Woman: One where --
Man: The QUESTION was OBVIOUSLY RHETORICAL

{{header: toughen up at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: It's like you can't even unhinge your jaw and let the dark pour out unheeded into the world at large anymore, without the all-consuming void gushing from your black center devouring the stars and the birds and the sun and the elements that combine to make love possible!}}

It's like you can't even unhinge your jaw and let the dark pour out unheeded into the world at large anymore, without the all-consuming void gushing from your black center devouring the stars and the birds and the sun and the elements that combine to make love possible!

#1071; Old Dog, Oldest Trick

  — October 24th, 2014

[ Tags: , , , ]       Permalink: https://wondermark.com/c/1071/

Buy a Print

Bolted! Fulfillment Update

May 25, 2026 by David Malki !
Photo courtesy of backer Nicola!

The vast majority of Bolted! game shipments are already shipped, but I understand if you don’t have yours yet, who cares. Here’s a progress report:

Total orders | 1052
Surveys completed | 992
Fully shipped | 946

Incomplete surveys

Obviously, if I don’t have your shipping address, I can’t ship your game! Let me know if you are missing a survey link. As new responses come in, they are rapidly added to the shipping queue.

Orders containing certain add-ons

Some of the add-ons proved more popular than expected — which is lovely! But it meant I had to reprint some stickers, make all the individual comic prints, request a shipment of books from offsite storage, etc, etc. So, any orders which contain an out-of-stock item are still waiting to ship.

All that missing stuff, though, is en route to me at this very second! So those orders will be going out pretty dang soon!

Custom items

I’ve already been in touch directly with the backers who ordered custom collages! Those will be created (and sent to you) after all the other shipments are complete. I’m excited for those, they’ll be fun! My pleasant dessert after the hearty meal of all the other orders.

Anything wrong?

I’m very grateful to the few folks who’ve contacted me to report some kind of issue with their shipment! Thankfully, problems are rare, but when they do occur, I would like to solve them. Please don’t hesitate to send me an email (replying to your shipping confirmation works great) if there’s anything about your order I can correct.

Reviews & photos

On BoardGameGeek are highly appreciated!

Unless you hate the game! You are entitled to that opinion, but please send that review directly to me instead of telling anyone else, so I can eat it and bury it in the yard and watch it grow into a twisted, gnarled tree. Or whatever!


Recent blog posts