Comic Transcripts

[[ Two individuals, Carl and someone we’ll call Floyd, in old-fashioned diving suits. ]]
Carl: Check out my new diving suit! Top of the line, two thousand bucks! No expense spared!
Floyd: HA! I made MINE from common items at Home Depot. Just as nice, at a fraction of the price!

[[ Same scene. Floyd has added several odd attachments to his diving suit. ]]
Caption: LATER
Carl: Listen, man, you almost died last time. You sure you got the bugs worked out of that suit?
Floyd: The problem wasn’t BUGS the problem was WATER getting into the SUIT. I just needed new fittings, is all. And sealant. And better hoses. I’m all set now!

[[ Same scene. Floyd has replaced the odd attachments from before with other odd attachments. ]]
Caption: LATER
Carl: There is NO WAY I’m letting you into the water in that thing. Not after the LAST two times.
Floyd: You don’t OWN the water, Carl! I FIXED the problem! The canvas just needed to be GALVANIZED! Now MOVE ASIDE and LET ME DIVE!

[[ Same scene. Floyd has once more replaced the odd attachments with ever odder attachments. ]]
Caption: LATER
Floyd: I’ve spent six thousand dollars on this freaking thing and it STILL leaks.
Carl: Ah, but you did it YOURSELF!

{{header: bash together some WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: The Darwin Awards are the only awards that take only one vote to win.}}

#734; When Elbow Grease is Toxic transcribed by in

[[ Two individuals, Carl and someone we’ll call Floyd, in old-fashioned diving suits. ]]
Carl: Check out my new diving suit! Top of the line, two thousand bucks! No expense spared!
Floyd: HA! I made MINE from common items at Home Depot. Just as nice, at a fraction of the price!

[[ Same scene. Floyd has added several odd attachments to his diving suit. ]]
Caption: LATER
Carl: Listen, man, you almost died last time. You sure you got the bugs worked out of that suit?
Floyd: The problem wasn’t BUGS the problem was WATER getting into the SUIT. I just needed new fittings, is all. And sealant. And better hoses. I’m all set now!

[[ Same scene. Floyd has replaced the odd attachments from before with other odd attachments. ]]
Caption: LATER
Carl: There is NO WAY I’m letting you into the water in that thing. Not after the LAST two times.
Floyd: You don’t OWN the water, Carl! I FIXED the problem! The canvas just needed to be GALVANIZED! Now MOVE ASIDE and LET ME DIVE!

[[ Same scene. Floyd has once more replaced the odd attachments with ever odder attachments. ]]
Caption: LATER
Floyd: I’ve spent six thousand dollars on this freaking thing and it STILL leaks.
Carl: Ah, but you did it YOURSELF!

{{header: bash together some WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: The Darwin Awards are the only awards that take only one vote to win.}}

#734; When Elbow Grease is Toxic transcribed by in

[[ Two individuals, Carl and someone we'll call Floyd, in old-fashioned diving suits. ]]
Carl: Check out my new diving suit! Top of the line, two thousand bucks! No expense spared!
Floyd: HA! I made MINE from common items at Home Depot. Just as nice, at a fraction of the price!

[[ Same scene. Floyd has added several odd attachments to his diving suit. ]]
Caption: LATER
Carl: Listen, man, you almost died last time. You sure you got the bugs worked out of that suit?
Floyd: The problem wasn't BUGS the problem was WATER getting into the SUIT. I just needed new fittings, is all. And sealant. And better hoses. I'm all set now!

[[ Same scene. Floyd has replaced the odd attachments from before with other odd attachments. ]]
Caption: LATER
Carl: There is NO WAY I'm letting you into the water in that thing. Not after the LAST two times.
Floyd: You don't OWN the water, Carl! I FIXED the problem! The canvas just needed to be GALVANIZED! Now MOVE ASIDE and LET ME DIVE!

[[ Same scene. Floyd has once more replaced the odd attachments with ever odder attachments. ]]
Caption: LATER
Floyd: I've spent six thousand dollars on this freaking thing and it STILL leaks.
Carl: Ah, but you did it YOURSELF!

{{header: bash together some WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: The Darwin Awards are the only awards that take only one vote to win.}}

The Darwin Awards are the only awards that take only one vote to win.

My newest game: Noodle Battle! At PAX!

The past few weeks have been a frenzy of assembling the very laborious, very bespoke first print run of NOODLE BATTLE, the puzzle game I am releasing this weekend at PAX West in Seattle!

PAX has an event called the PNW Tabletop Game Market (Saturday night ONLY), which is a curated selection of short-run games from local designers. As I’ve mentioned in this space before, I applied for a space in this fall’s event mainly as a way to force myself to finish a new game. And here it is!

The drawings are all by Jason Poland, good pal and cartoonist of My Dad Is Dracula. Jason played an early version of this game at Alaska Robotics Comics Camp this spring, and really liked it!

So I said, “Do you want to help me make it?” And so he has! It was his idea to make all the characters fun little animals, and I think it adds a ton of charm.

Because this edition is limited-run, it has been incredibly labor-intensive to make! The boxes and cards were made by a game factory in the usual fashion, but separately. The blank tiles were made by a woodworker dude out of Connecticut. For each game, we have had to:

  • Cut a piece of plastic and install the box window
  • Paint all the tiles, hundreds at a time
  • Apply a sticker to both sides of every tile
  • Apply stickers to the box (we couldn’t get the box back printed in time, so the whole back side of the box is a sticker too)
  • Apply the “Nutrition Facts” sticker, which was a late suggestion by my kid that I just had to run with
  • Fold up the rule sheet (they come from the printer as big strips of paper)
  • Put all the components into the box and seal it all up

I knew it would be a lot of work and would require some inefficient, expensive compromises AND I WAS RIGHT. But the final product is turning out great, which is the important thing!!

I will have 50 copies with me (if all goes well) at PAX, and then between now and the holidays we will be putting together additional copies to round out this first edition.

I will announce additional copies on Patreon first, once they are available online!! And here too, naturally, before long.

You can also sign up here if you’d like me to email you once the game is available online!


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