Comic Transcripts

PRUDENCE: Let me get this straight.
I sent you off with MAGIC BEANS that can access the world of the GIANTS.
And you TRADED them? For a COW?!

PRUDENCE: Do you know how LONG it took me to CULTIVATE those magic beans?
They had to be spliced. And selected. And bred. And enchanted.
We had a PLAN, Stanley. We were going to go to the LAND OF THE GIANTS and PLUNDER their kingdom!

STANLEY: B-but I thought with a COW we could maybe–
PRUDENCE: Could WHAT, Stanley?
WHAT could we have done with a MANGY OLD COW that we couldn’t have done a HUNDRED TIMES OVER with a giant’s GIANT COW?

PRUDENCE: I swear! You and your THOUGHTS!
…Where IS that old cow, anyway?
STANLEY: That’s what I’ve been trying to SAY!
I TRADED it. For a MAGIC ANTHILL.
PRUDENCE: …A MAGIC anthill?
STANLEY: The ANTS
NEVER STOP

{{header: swap for WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{Alt-text: They form a long red line anchoring nightmares to the core of the Earth. I thought it would be a good trade}}

#596; Stanley the Trader transcribed by in

PRUDENCE: Let me get this straight.
I sent you off with MAGIC BEANS that can access the world of the GIANTS.
And you TRADED them? For a COW?!

PRUDENCE: Do you know how LONG it took me to CULTIVATE those magic beans?
They had to be spliced. And selected. And bred. And enchanted.
We had a PLAN, Stanley. We were going to go to the LAND OF THE GIANTS and PLUNDER their kingdom!

STANLEY: B-but I thought with a COW we could maybe--
PRUDENCE: Could WHAT, Stanley?
WHAT could we have done with a MANGY OLD COW that we couldn't have done a HUNDRED TIMES OVER with a giant's GIANT COW?

PRUDENCE: I swear! You and your THOUGHTS!
...Where IS that old cow, anyway?
STANLEY: That's what I've been trying to SAY!
I TRADED it. For a MAGIC ANTHILL.
PRUDENCE: ...A MAGIC anthill?
STANLEY: The ANTS
NEVER STOP

{{header: swap for WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{Alt-text: They form a long red line anchoring nightmares to the core of the Earth. I thought it would be a good trade}}

They form a long red line anchoring nightmares to the core of the Earth. I thought it would be a good trade

Bolted! Fulfillment Update

Photo courtesy of backer Nicola!

The vast majority of Bolted! game shipments are already shipped, but I understand if you don’t have yours yet, who cares. Here’s a progress report:

Total orders | 1052
Surveys completed | 992
Fully shipped | 946

Incomplete surveys

Obviously, if I don’t have your shipping address, I can’t ship your game! Let me know if you are missing a survey link. As new responses come in, they are rapidly added to the shipping queue.

Orders containing certain add-ons

Some of the add-ons proved more popular than expected — which is lovely! But it meant I had to reprint some stickers, make all the individual comic prints, request a shipment of books from offsite storage, etc, etc. So, any orders which contain an out-of-stock item are still waiting to ship.

All that missing stuff, though, is en route to me at this very second! So those orders will be going out pretty dang soon!

Custom items

I’ve already been in touch directly with the backers who ordered custom collages! Those will be created (and sent to you) after all the other shipments are complete. I’m excited for those, they’ll be fun! My pleasant dessert after the hearty meal of all the other orders.

Anything wrong?

I’m very grateful to the few folks who’ve contacted me to report some kind of issue with their shipment! Thankfully, problems are rare, but when they do occur, I would like to solve them. Please don’t hesitate to send me an email (replying to your shipping confirmation works great) if there’s anything about your order I can correct.

Reviews & photos

On BoardGameGeek are highly appreciated!

Unless you hate the game! You are entitled to that opinion, but please send that review directly to me instead of telling anyone else, so I can eat it and bury it in the yard and watch it grow into a twisted, gnarled tree. Or whatever!


Recent blog posts