Comic Transcripts

Title: THE STARS OF WONDERMARK SPEAK OUT ON THE SUBJECT OF THEIR CREATOR

[[A professor sits, reading from a slim volume held in his hand.]]
Professor: I first made the acquaintance of young Master Malki ! when he came under my tutelage at Oxford — Introduction to Mad Biochemistry, as I recall. Frightfully lacking in his dedication to matters of academia. “Malki !, my lad,” I told him on more than one occasion, “if you persist in your obsession with comical engravings when you should be hard at work developing better and more virulent strains of neurotoxin, then I fail to see how you ever hope to inspire fear in the governments of the world.” But some boys just refuse to listen.

[[A woman dressed entirely in black, holding a knife.]]
Woman: WHERE IS HE — LET ME AT THE BASTARD — Next time you try to pay off a jilted lover, David !, you’d best be sure the check don’t bounce. Fool gon’ wish he’d been born without eyeballs, once I gets to stabbin’.

[[A man wearing a sandwich board, which reads: “NO COMMENT”]]

[[A man wearing a porkpie hat, sitting on a bench reading his newspaper. He removes his spectacles.]]
Man: David Malki ! is not an easy man to know. He’s like … like a row which has been filled completely save for a 3 and a 7, but there is not enough information in the surrounding grid to determine which digit should go in which box, a delicate state in which a single misstep could lead to further erroneous assumptions, compounding upon itself until the entire puzzle is rendered unsalvageable. Sometimes I suspect he doesn’t even *like* Sudoku.

{{header: this is your life at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: read it while sipping tea}}

#208; Guest Comic by Thomas R. Brendel transcribed by in

Title: THE STARS OF WONDERMARK SPEAK OUT ON THE SUBJECT OF THEIR CREATOR

[[A professor sits, reading from a slim volume held in his hand.]]
Professor: I first made the acquaintance of young Master Malki ! when he came under my tutelage at Oxford — Introduction to Mad Biochemistry, as I recall. Frightfully lacking in his dedication to matters of academia. “Malki !, my lad,” I told him on more than one occasion, “if you persist in your obsession with comical engravings when you should be hard at work developing better and more virulent strains of neurotoxin, then I fail to see how you ever hope to inspire fear in the governments of the world.” But some boys just refuse to listen.

[[A woman dressed entirely in black, holding a knife.]]
Woman: WHERE IS HE — LET ME AT THE BASTARD — Next time you try to pay off a jilted lover, David !, you’d best be sure the check don’t bounce. Fool gon’ wish he’d been born without eyeballs, once I gets to stabbin’.

[[A man wearing a sandwich board, which reads: “NO COMMENT”]]

[[A man wearing a porkpie hat, sitting on a bench reading his newspaper. He removes his spectacles.]]
Man: David Malki ! is not an easy man to know. He’s like … like a row which has been filled completely save for a 3 and a 7, but there is not enough information in the surrounding grid to determine which digit should go in which box, a delicate state in which a single misstep could lead to further erroneous assumptions, compounding upon itself until the entire puzzle is rendered unsalvageable. Sometimes I suspect he doesn’t even *like* Sudoku.

{{header: this is your life at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: read it while sipping tea}}

#208; Guest Comic by Thomas R. Brendel transcribed by in

Title: THE STARS OF WONDERMARK SPEAK OUT ON THE SUBJECT OF THEIR CREATOR

[[A professor sits, reading from a slim volume held in his hand.]]
Professor: I first made the acquaintance of young Master Malki ! when he came under my tutelage at Oxford -- Introduction to Mad Biochemistry, as I recall. Frightfully lacking in his dedication to matters of academia. "Malki !, my lad," I told him on more than one occasion, "if you persist in your obsession with comical engravings when you should be hard at work developing better and more virulent strains of neurotoxin, then I fail to see how you ever hope to inspire fear in the governments of the world." But some boys just refuse to listen.

[[A woman dressed entirely in black, holding a knife.]]
Woman: WHERE IS HE -- LET ME AT THE BASTARD -- Next time you try to pay off a jilted lover, David !, you'd best be sure the check don't bounce. Fool gon' wish he'd been born without eyeballs, once I gets to stabbin'.

[[A man wearing a sandwich board, which reads: "NO COMMENT"]]

[[A man wearing a porkpie hat, sitting on a bench reading his newspaper. He removes his spectacles.]]
Man: David Malki ! is not an easy man to know. He's like ... like a row which has been filled completely save for a 3 and a 7, but there is not enough information in the surrounding grid to determine which digit should go in which box, a delicate state in which a single misstep could lead to further erroneous assumptions, compounding upon itself until the entire puzzle is rendered unsalvageable. Sometimes I suspect he doesn't even *like* Sudoku.

{{header: this is your life at WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: read it while sipping tea}}

#208; Guest Comic by Thomas R. Brendel

  — July 12th, 2006

[ Tags: ]       Permalink: https://wondermark.com/c/208/

Guest comic by Thomas R. Brendel.

Buy a Print

New ways to get Bolted!

July 24, 2026 by David Malki !

In addition to buying things directly from me, the normal way, my game Bolted! is also now available on Amazon dot com.

On that famous website, you can also get the Creature-Crafting Magnets Set, which is made of the same artwork from the game, but is just a weird little trinket (not a playable game).

My kiddo made the elaborate version below to show off just how many magnets you get in the set (it’s 150 pieces in all — this isn’t even all of them).

Also now on Amazon is my set of Multi-Purpose Greeting Cards — a full dozen cards with envelopes in a fancy, unbranded, foil-stamped box!

Event alert!

I’ll also be showing off Bolted! at Greenwood Games, an event in Seattle this Saturday:

Greenwood Games is a free, all-ages community game event that invites players to spend the afternoon walking Greenwood Avenue from 65th to 80th, collecting clues, cracking puzzles, and discovering games made right here in Washington.

Think of it as Pride Hop, ArtWalk, and the Gumshoe all rolled into one,  except the whole thing is built around games and puzzles.​

Local game designers will be set up at different places along Greenwood Avenue in Phinney Ridge (near Ballard). My specific spot will be the “Holy Mountain Phinney Ridge Taproom”. All the information about all the different games & venues is on the website!

(If you’re in Seattle generally but not free tomorrow, Bolted! is also stocked at Blue Highway Games in Queen Anne.)

Next week, I’ll be at Gen Con! I personally will be hanging with my buddy Sam Logan at BFE Webcomics, booth #1217… but I have it on good authority that copies of Bolted! will be available at the CRWN Studios booth, #2549.

Visit one booth! Then the other! The order…is up to you.


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