Comic Transcripts

[[GLARY stands facing away from an elephant named DARVEY whose bones had previously fallen out and who was attempting to stretch their skin over a mammoth skeleton.]]

GLARY: How’s it going in there?
DARVEY: It’s…well, it’s not the best fit…
GLARY: Is it gonna work, do you think?
DARVEY: It won’t be pretty.

GLARY: I bet it’ll be beautiful. You’re gonna be hotter than hot. You’ll be on fleek. You’re gonna be…BAE.
DARVEY: Please don’t use such words in this delicate time
GLARY: You’re gonna be…SHAWTY? You’re gonna be… I’m running out of terms. You’re gonna be fly. I bet you look DA BOMB DIGGITY.

DARVEY: All right. I’m coming out. Please be gentle. It took a lot of work to get it to look THIS good.
GLARY: Listen, J.D. You’ll always be MY hot slice no matter WHAT it looks like.
GLARY: My gray goat. My good gravy. My bony Broheim. My super-duper Mario Mansion. My Netflix and chillax.

DARVEY: SO…This is what it looks like when you put a fossilized mammoth skeleton into an elephant body whose bones all fell out previously.

[[Final panel reveals the DARVEY in all his horrible, decayed glory. The skeleton appears to be too large for the elephant skin, and is busting out in certain places like the ribcage and the knees. Likewise the tusks have come out of the face in a distressing and unnatural manner. GLARY, however, has placed both hands over his heart in swooning admiration, crying out.]]

GLARY: …CHECK OUT MY THICC ELEPHANT!!
DARVEY: Y-you really think so?!

#1421; Bones of Stone, For the Bold transcribed by in

[[GLARY stands facing away from an elephant named DARVEY whose bones had previously fallen out and who was attempting to stretch their skin over a mammoth skeleton.]]

GLARY: How’s it going in there?
DARVEY: It’s…well, it’s not the best fit…
GLARY: Is it gonna work, do you think?
DARVEY: It won’t be pretty.

GLARY: I bet it’ll be beautiful. You’re gonna be hotter than hot. You’ll be on fleek. You’re gonna be…BAE.
DARVEY: Please don’t use such words in this delicate time
GLARY: You’re gonna be…SHAWTY? You’re gonna be… I’m running out of terms. You’re gonna be fly. I bet you look DA BOMB DIGGITY.

DARVEY: All right. I’m coming out. Please be gentle. It took a lot of work to get it to look THIS good.
GLARY: Listen, J.D. You’ll always be MY hot slice no matter WHAT it looks like.
GLARY: My gray goat. My good gravy. My bony Broheim. My super-duper Mario Mansion. My Netflix and chillax.

DARVEY: SO…This is what it looks like when you put a fossilized mammoth skeleton into an elephant body whose bones all fell out previously.

[[Final panel reveals the DARVEY in all his horrible, decayed glory. The skeleton appears to be too large for the elephant skin, and is busting out in certain places like the ribcage and the knees. Likewise the tusks have come out of the face in a distressing and unnatural manner. GLARY, however, has placed both hands over his heart in swooning admiration, crying out.]]

GLARY: …CHECK OUT MY THICC ELEPHANT!!
DARVEY: Y-you really think so?!

fortunately there are lots of handy how-to techniques for this process on SkelShare.com

#1421; Bones of Stone, For the Bold

  — September 4th, 2018

[ Tags: , , , ]       Permalink: https://wondermark.com/c/1421/

Buy a Print

New ways to get Bolted!

July 24, 2026 by David Malki !

In addition to buying things directly from me, the normal way, my game Bolted! is also now available on Amazon dot com.

On that famous website, you can also get the Creature-Crafting Magnets Set, which is made of the same artwork from the game, but is just a weird little trinket (not a playable game).

My kiddo made the elaborate version below to show off just how many magnets you get in the set (it’s 150 pieces in all — this isn’t even all of them).

Also now on Amazon is my set of Multi-Purpose Greeting Cards — a full dozen cards with envelopes in a fancy, unbranded, foil-stamped box!

Event alert!

I’ll also be showing off Bolted! at Greenwood Games, an event in Seattle this Saturday:

Greenwood Games is a free, all-ages community game event that invites players to spend the afternoon walking Greenwood Avenue from 65th to 80th, collecting clues, cracking puzzles, and discovering games made right here in Washington.

Think of it as Pride Hop, ArtWalk, and the Gumshoe all rolled into one,  except the whole thing is built around games and puzzles.​

Local game designers will be set up at different places along Greenwood Avenue in Phinney Ridge (near Ballard). My specific spot will be the “Holy Mountain Phinney Ridge Taproom”. All the information about all the different games & venues is on the website!

(If you’re in Seattle generally but not free tomorrow, Bolted! is also stocked at Blue Highway Games in Queen Anne.)

Next week, I’ll be at Gen Con! I personally will be hanging with my buddy Sam Logan at BFE Webcomics, booth #1217… but I have it on good authority that copies of Bolted! will be available at the CRWN Studios booth, #2549.

Visit one booth! Then the other! The order…is up to you.


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