#1372; First a Bang, Then a Whisper

Comic Transcripts

[[A press conference. ASAPH stands at a podium in front of several microphones, with a previous edition of The Headline Bugle newspaper framed on an easel next to him. The headline reads: GENIUS. The subheadline reads: “The idea just came to me,” says modern-day Prometheus. Two visible photographers, VIOLET and SEBASTIAN, and two out-of-frame persons, ORSAMUS and ZOPHAR, look on.]]

ASAPH: Thank you all for coming. As you recall, some years ago I proposed a method of eating Cheetos using chopsticks.
VIOLET: Genius!
SEBASTIAN: Life-changing.
ORSAMUS: It keeps the orange crap off your fingers!
ZOPHAR: Dude, we KNOW!

ASAPH: Now, after much study and experimentation, I’d like to present ANOTHER culinary revolution. Hit the music.

[[Water is shown pouring into an ice cube tray.]]

ASAPH: Tired of filling your ice cube tray at the sink and then spilling water everywhere before getting it into the freezer? NOW, a BETTER way! Simply put the tray in the freezer FIRST, then fill it with water from a Dixie cup! Or, use a funnel! They sell funnels with long flexible spouts at the GAS STATION next to the MOTOR OIL!

[[We zoom out to the press conference, and see that the image of the filling ice cube tray is on the easel where the newspaper was previously pictured.]]

ASAPH: Thank you. We will not have any Q & A time as questions are unnecessary. You have each been given a flash drive with print-res photos and sample prewritten copy for your articles. Last time I got the front page…can we do even BETTER somehow? Let’s HACK THE FUTURE…TOGETHER. Also, blockchain. Thank you.

CAPTION: Soon.
[[We see another issue of The Headline Bugle. The headline reads: SOPHOMORE SLUMP? The subheadline reads: Inventor’s lackluster followup gets icy reception. Asaph indignantly remarks from out-of-frame.]]
ASAPH: Aw, COME ON!

[[OTHNIEL and Asaph converse, as Asaph holds the offending newspaper.]]

OTHNIEL: Hey, sometimes you’re the hottest thing around, and then you’re not anymore.
ASAPH: And what HAPPENS when something is NO LONGER HOT? IT DOES MY THING!! IT FREEZES!!!

#1372; First a Bang, Then a Whisper transcribed by in

[[A press conference. ASAPH stands at a podium in front of several microphones, with a previous edition of The Headline Bugle newspaper framed on an easel next to him. The headline reads: GENIUS. The subheadline reads: "The idea just came to me," says modern-day Prometheus. Two visible photographers, VIOLET and SEBASTIAN, and two out-of-frame persons, ORSAMUS and ZOPHAR, look on.]]

ASAPH: Now, after much study and experimentation, I'd like to present ANOTHER culinary revolution. Hit the music.

[[Water is shown pouring into an ice cube tray.]]

[[We zoom out to the press conference, and see that the image of the filling ice cube tray is on the easel where the newspaper was previously pictured.]]

ASAPH: Thank you. We will not have any Q & A time as questions are unnecessary. You have each been given a flash drive with print-res photos and sample prewritten copy for your articles. Last time I got the front page...can we do even BETTER somehow? Let's HACK THE FUTURE...TOGETHER. Also, blockchain. Thank you.

CAPTION: Soon.
[[We see another issue of The Headline Bugle. The headline reads: SOPHOMORE SLUMP? The subheadline reads: Inventor's lackluster followup gets icy reception. Asaph indignantly remarks from out-of-frame.]]
ASAPH: Aw, COME ON!

[[OTHNIEL and Asaph converse, as Asaph holds the offending newspaper.]]

OTHNIEL: Hey, sometimes you're the hottest thing around, and then you're not anymore.
ASAPH: And what HAPPENS when something is NO LONGER HOT? IT DOES MY THING!! IT FREEZES!!!

I suppose it depends on the shape of your freezer.

#1372; First a Bang, Then a Whisper

— January 19th, 2018

[ Tags: dining, solutions ] Permalink: https://wondermark.com/c/1372/

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Bolted! games have been shipping to backers over the last couple of weeks! The non-US orders are (mostly) done and some folks have been reporting receiving them already!

@davidmalki.com My game arrived today!! It looks gorgeous 🙂 Hope you are well 🙂

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— Lar deSouza (@lartist.bsky.social) April 2, 2026 at 2:52 PM

My US inventory of games is now in-country, but still being staged at the fulfillment centers. It’s being distributed to regional warehouses, so the actual shipping to backers happens more efficiently. I hope the bulk of US shipping will start next week.

These are what the cartons (and games) look like!

bolted! games BOLTED! GAMES (pounding the table) B O L T E D ! G A M E S

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— david malki ! (@davidmalki.com) April 3, 2026 at 10:37 AM

I am also waiting on the bonus cards to be finished printing! I ended up needing many more of those than I had anticipated, so I decided to have the game factory print those too, for perfect matching with the base game cards.

Most people will be receiving two separate mailings: the game itself, and “anything else” (bonus cards and/or add-ons) which will be sent by me personally.

As of today, 86% of backers have completed their surveys so far! That’s pretty good, but it’s not everyone. I know YOU PERSONALLY have already completed YOURS though, so no worries!!

We have now moved OFF of Kickstarter and ONTO BackerKit for any new orders. You can bundle a game with basically anything else I sell on that there website, it’s pretty nuts!

Comic Transcripts

#1372; First a Bang, Then a Whisper

— January 19th, 2018

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