Comic Transcripts

[[TEDDICUS and BILLOCLES hang out.]]

TEDDICUS: Losing weight is burning calories, right?  You work out to generate HEAT?  I decided I’d skip the middleman!  Now I only eat food that’s ALREADY HOT!  So it’s got LESS FAR to GO!

BILLOCLES:  I’m not sure that’s actually how calories work?

TEDDICUS: OH! You’re NOT SURE? WELL then!  I AM sure, so guess who wins?

TEDDICUS: See, YOUR problem is you’re always worried you MIGHT BE WRONG.  If you’re always trying to DISPROVE things and poke holes in logic and dismiss incomplete evidence, you’ll SUCCEED–but you’ll never be satisfied!

TEDDICUS: You’ll just pick an arbitrary point where you’re satisfied for the time being–until some NEW information comes along to capsize the whole boat!  What a miserable life!  Scrabbling for scraps of validation!

TEDDICUS: My way of thinking is much simpler.  I’m just right all the time.  No mess, no fuss!  Never have to wonder, never have to worry!  It’s very liberating.

BILLOCLES: But what if you’re…wrong?

TEDDICUS: Seriously, dude, you need to seek therapy because there is that OBSESSION again.

{{header: of course, it’s WONDERMARK.COM}}

#1097; Always Right has Never Left transcribed by in

[[TEDDICUS and BILLOCLES hang out.]]

TEDDICUS: Losing weight is burning calories, right?  You work out to generate HEAT?  I decided I'd skip the middleman!  Now I only eat food that's ALREADY HOT!  So it's got LESS FAR to GO!

BILLOCLES:  I'm not sure that's actually how calories work?

TEDDICUS: OH! You're NOT SURE? WELL then!  I AM sure, so guess who wins?

TEDDICUS: See, YOUR problem is you're always worried you MIGHT BE WRONG.  If you're always trying to DISPROVE things and poke holes in logic and dismiss incomplete evidence, you'll SUCCEED--but you'll never be satisfied!

TEDDICUS: You'll just pick an arbitrary point where you're satisfied for the time being--until some NEW information comes along to capsize the whole boat!  What a miserable life!  Scrabbling for scraps of validation!

TEDDICUS: My way of thinking is much simpler.  I'm just right all the time.  No mess, no fuss!  Never have to wonder, never have to worry!  It's very liberating.

BILLOCLES: But what if you're...wrong?

TEDDICUS: Seriously, dude, you need to seek therapy because there is that OBSESSION again.

{{header: of course, it's WONDERMARK.COM}}

once I THOUGHT I was wrong but then I remembered the definition of Always Right and, whew!

#1097; Always Right has Never Left

  — January 29th, 2015

[ Tags: , , ]       Permalink: https://wondermark.com/c/1097/

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Applications open for Genius Northwest – an IRL gaming competition

May 8, 2026 by David Malki !

Last year, I participated in Genius Northwest, a gaming competition inspired by the Korean gameshow The Genius and its ilk.

It’s a reality show without the cameras — a 3-day, all-inclusive weekend retreat structured around a series of challenges and puzzles, in which personalities and dealmaking matter as much as playing games.

It’s truly a remarkable thing. I came in dead last in the competition, but I still had a great time participating.

The event is held annually in the Pacific Northwest (hence the name) and applications are now open to participate in the 2026 competition!

Learn more — and apply — at GeniusNW.com.


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