Comic Transcripts

[[Indoors. A kitchen. CRAYLIA has earbuds in her ears, and her eyes closed. BARBATHA shouts from out of frame to get her attention.]]

BARBATHA: Hey Craylia, did you… CRAYLIA. CRAYLIA.

[[Craylia removes one earbud and turns toward Barbatha with her eyes open.]]

CRAYLIA: OH, sorry! I was just–
BARBATHA: Drums deep in a PODCAST, I know!
CRAYLIA: Yes, I like to fill my idle moments with enlightenment and entertainment! Right now I’m listening to one called EYE BEFORE ME.

CRAYLIA: The hosts track down and interview ALL THE PREVIOUS OWNERS of a subject’s GLASS EYE. It’s actually quite fascinating…full of pathos AND interesting tidbits about the glass eye secondary market. Did you know ALL KNOWN GLASS EYES were manufactured between 1740 and 1915? NONE since then! The WAR killed the last guy who knew the secret! Like STRADIVARIUS!

BARBATHA: Sorry, I started singing to myself when I sensed you growing excited.
CRAYLIA: Seeing a FULL PLAYLIST is like pulling a warm blanket out of the dryer. I never have to be alone. Podcasts are the promise of the internet made real. No matter what I’m into, or what mood I’m in, SOMEONE out there is making something that speaks to me.
BARBATHA: I’d feel like I was in front of a firehose. Are you LISTENING to them all? Or are they just building up in your phone like digital cholesterol?

[[Craylia has returned her earpod to her ear and closed her eyes again.]]

CRAYLIA: Right now I’ve got unlistened-to episodes totaling… 875,122 HOURS.
BARBATHA: That’s TWICE as long as you’re likely to LIVE!
CRAYLIA: Well…there’s actually a lot of promising research being done into increasing the human lifespan… I heard about it on a podcast

{{header: subscribe and review WONDERMARK.COM}}

#1336; In which Much remains Unheard Of transcribed by in

[[Indoors. A kitchen. CRAYLIA has earbuds in her ears, and her eyes closed. BARBATHA shouts from out of frame to get her attention.]]

BARBATHA: Hey Craylia, did you... CRAYLIA. CRAYLIA.

[[Craylia removes one earbud and turns toward Barbatha with her eyes open.]]

CRAYLIA: OH, sorry! I was just--
BARBATHA: Drums deep in a PODCAST, I know!
CRAYLIA: Yes, I like to fill my idle moments with enlightenment and entertainment! Right now I'm listening to one called EYE BEFORE ME.

CRAYLIA: The hosts track down and interview ALL THE PREVIOUS OWNERS of a subject's GLASS EYE. It's actually quite fascinating...full of pathos AND interesting tidbits about the glass eye secondary market. Did you know ALL KNOWN GLASS EYES were manufactured between 1740 and 1915? NONE since then! The WAR killed the last guy who knew the secret! Like STRADIVARIUS!

BARBATHA: Sorry, I started singing to myself when I sensed you growing excited.
CRAYLIA: Seeing a FULL PLAYLIST is like pulling a warm blanket out of the dryer. I never have to be alone. Podcasts are the promise of the internet made real. No matter what I'm into, or what mood I'm in, SOMEONE out there is making something that speaks to me.
BARBATHA: I'd feel like I was in front of a firehose. Are you LISTENING to them all? Or are they just building up in your phone like digital cholesterol?

[[Craylia has returned her earpod to her ear and closed her eyes again.]]

CRAYLIA: Right now I’ve got unlistened-to episodes totaling… 875,122 HOURS.
BARBATHA: That’s TWICE as long as you’re likely to LIVE!
CRAYLIA: Well…there’s actually a lot of promising research being done into increasing the human lifespan… I heard about it on a podcast

{{header: subscribe and review WONDERMARK.COM}}

The bigger question is, what am I gonna do with all these Casper mattresses???

Bolted! Fulfillment Update

Photo courtesy of backer Nicola!

The vast majority of Bolted! game shipments are already shipped, but I understand if you don’t have yours yet, who cares. Here’s a progress report:

Total orders | 1052
Surveys completed | 992
Fully shipped | 946

Incomplete surveys

Obviously, if I don’t have your shipping address, I can’t ship your game! Let me know if you are missing a survey link. As new responses come in, they are rapidly added to the shipping queue.

Orders containing certain add-ons

Some of the add-ons proved more popular than expected — which is lovely! But it meant I had to reprint some stickers, make all the individual comic prints, request a shipment of books from offsite storage, etc, etc. So, any orders which contain an out-of-stock item are still waiting to ship.

All that missing stuff, though, is en route to me at this very second! So those orders will be going out pretty dang soon!

Custom items

I’ve already been in touch directly with the backers who ordered custom collages! Those will be created (and sent to you) after all the other shipments are complete. I’m excited for those, they’ll be fun! My pleasant dessert after the hearty meal of all the other orders.

Anything wrong?

I’m very grateful to the few folks who’ve contacted me to report some kind of issue with their shipment! Thankfully, problems are rare, but when they do occur, I would like to solve them. Please don’t hesitate to send me an email (replying to your shipping confirmation works great) if there’s anything about your order I can correct.

Reviews & photos

On BoardGameGeek are highly appreciated!

Unless you hate the game! You are entitled to that opinion, but please send that review directly to me instead of telling anyone else, so I can eat it and bury it in the yard and watch it grow into a twisted, gnarled tree. Or whatever!


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