HARRY: HEY! Turn off that TV! What did I say about contemporary children's media?
HARRY: WHAT did Daddy SAY.
HARRY JR: It's bad for my brain.
HARRY: That's RIGHT. If you wanna watch TV, you can watch DVDs of 1980s Sesame Street, before it got all PC.
If you're good, we'll play a little SUPER MARIO ALL-STARS on the Super Nintendo.
JENNIFER: Oh, HARRY. Still trying to give your son your own childhood?
HARRY: I sure don't trust TODAY'S culture not to mess him up!
I don't want him becoming some texting-crazed exhibitionist Facebook-urchin with a narcissistic sense of entitlement!
I have to feed him SAFE cultural artifacts from MY childhood--the stuff that made ME into the decent person I am today.
JENNIFER: I thought your parents tried to raise you on Howdy Doody and Bosco drink.
HARRY: Ooh yeah and I HATED it!
{{Header: stick with WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{Alt-text: Harry quickly hides his iPhone. 'Now, the Internet won't exist until you're in high school,' he says, 'but here's a JCPenney catalog that came with the Sunday paper.'}}