Comic Transcripts

MARY: Are you still squeezing on that toothpaste tube? Give up! It’s empty!
KARL: Little-known fact: toothpaste tubes do not contain toothpaste. They CREATE toothpaste.

KARL: When you squeeze the tube, you generate energy. This powers a chemical reaction that results in the formation of a semi-solid mass. Which plops out the end. Theoretically it’s unlimited! But because of the half-life of the chemical catalysts, each reaction requires twice as much energy as the one before.

KARL: So the first draw – when the tube seems “full” – requires 0.0001 units of squeezing force. The second, 0.0002 units, etc. It’s easy at first, but that doubling gets serious after a while. Eventually it takes TRILLIONS of units of force! QUADRILLIONS!

KARL: Most people give up when it gets too tough. But I’ve got a vise and a torque wrench.
MARY: JUST GET A NEW TUBE OF TOOTHPASTE

{{header: clamp down on WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: If we can just get this crinkled mess into the Large Hadron Collider WE WILL NEVER HAVE TO BUY TOOTHPASTE AGAIN}}

#776; In which Toothpaste is made transcribed by in

MARY: Are you still squeezing on that toothpaste tube? Give up! It’s empty!
KARL: Little-known fact: toothpaste tubes do not contain toothpaste. They CREATE toothpaste.

KARL: When you squeeze the tube, you generate energy. This powers a chemical reaction that results in the formation of a semi-solid mass. Which plops out the end. Theoretically it’s unlimited! But because of the half-life of the chemical catalysts, each reaction requires twice as much energy as the one before.

KARL: So the first draw – when the tube seems “full” – requires 0.0001 units of squeezing force. The second, 0.0002 units, etc. It’s easy at first, but that doubling gets serious after a while. Eventually it takes TRILLIONS of units of force! QUADRILLIONS!

KARL: Most people give up when it gets too tough. But I’ve got a vise and a torque wrench.
MARY: JUST GET A NEW TUBE OF TOOTHPASTE

{{header: clamp down on WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: If we can just get this crinkled mess into the Large Hadron Collider WE WILL NEVER HAVE TO BUY TOOTHPASTE AGAIN}}

#776; In which Toothpaste is made transcribed by in

MARY: Are you still squeezing on that toothpaste tube? Give up! It's empty!
KARL: Little-known fact: toothpaste tubes do not contain toothpaste. They CREATE toothpaste.

KARL: When you squeeze the tube, you generate energy. This powers a chemical reaction that results in the formation of a semi-solid mass. Which plops out the end. Theoretically it's unlimited! But because of the half-life of the chemical catalysts, each reaction requires twice as much energy as the one before.

KARL: So the first draw - when the tube seems "full" - requires 0.0001 units of squeezing force. The second, 0.0002 units, etc. It's easy at first, but that doubling gets serious after a while. Eventually it takes TRILLIONS of units of force! QUADRILLIONS!

KARL: Most people give up when it gets too tough. But I've got a vise and a torque wrench.
MARY: JUST GET A NEW TUBE OF TOOTHPASTE

{{header: clamp down on WONDERMARK.COM}}
{{alt-text: If we can just get this crinkled mess into the Large Hadron Collider WE WILL NEVER HAVE TO BUY TOOTHPASTE AGAIN}}

If we can just get this crinkled mess into the Large Hadron Collider WE WILL NEVER HAVE TO BUY TOOTHPASTE AGAIN

#776; In which Toothpaste is made

  — December 2nd, 2011

[ Tags: , ]       Permalink: https://wondermark.com/c/776/

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20 years ago (in photocomic form)

June 9, 2026 by David Malki !
A young David Malki !, Steve Carey, and Ryan North, June 2006.

The computers tell me it was 20 years ago, June 9, 2006, that I arrived in New York for my first-ever comic convention as an exhibitor, MoCCA.

It was an important trip for me, a milestone in what would go on to become my career.

I wrote a little reminiscence on Patreon (free/unlocked) — including a first-since-then reprint of the photocomics I made at the time, documenting the trip!

Read the rest here: [ 20 Years Ago (In Photocomic Form) ]


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