This year,
Fantagraphics issued The Complete
Dennis the Menace Vol.1, a chunky hardback collecting all of
Hank Ketcham's 1951 and 1952 daily comic strips. Like The Complete Peanuts, the full Dennis will likely be twenty-five
volumes or so, enough to fill the mantel of any diehard fan, or at
least hold his car up while he swaps out the rims.
Dennis the Menace began mere months
after Peanuts, and like Peanuts, it illustrates the
continuing antics of a group of children. While Charles Schulz
continued to draw Peanuts for
its entire run, Hank Ketcham enlisted the help of assistants Marcus
Hamilton (who still draws the weekday strips) and Ron Ferdinand
(Sundays). The strip has for years been written by a team of gag
writers, much like a television sitcom is. Even while he was
drawing the strip himself, Ketcham never shied away from enlisting
hired assistance; in fact, he championed the idea, acknowleding that he
himself wasn't exactly a bottomless fount of material.
Ferdinand and
Hamilton began working for Ketcham in 1981 and 1993, respectively; by
1982 Ferdinand was illustrating the Sunday pages and in 1995 Ketcham
handed the dailies off to Hamilton. Although no longer the
strip's artist, Ketcham oversaw the Dennis
machine, personally approving individual strips and
presiding over a multimedia empire which, by his death in 2001,
included syndicated television programming, a Broadway musical, two
feature films, and a bevy of officially licensed products. Dennis the Menace in 2005 is a
brand name, an iconic presence -- and a thoroughly boring comic strip.

Ketcham was a fine
draftsman, and his successors have accurately and expressively captured
the breezy penwork and sketchy-1980s-clipart look of his style.
Unfortunately, they and the gag writers (whom I picture as balding,
pudgy men in horn-rimmed glasses, rubbing their comb-overs as they
recall the good ol' days of vaudeville) have seemingly forgotten to
make their title character into what the title calls him.
It's as if you went
to a wrestling match that was advertised as "PABLO THE PULVERIZER vs
CRUSHER JONES," and neither Pablo nor Jones did any crushing or
pulverizing, but rather discussed Sartre over finger sandwiches.
It's as if Vlad the
Impaler sort of, you know, slacked off on the impaling for a while and
took up needlepoint.
It's as if a hugely
profitable marketing behemoth demanded that reliable, inoffensive pap
be produced on an assembly-line schedule, and people were lining up to
take over the reins and suckle at the teat and churn out crap because,
hey, it's better than digging ditches for a living.
"But Doctor," you may
be saying, and if you are I will remind you that (like Dr. Laura
Schlessinger) my doctorate is actually in kinesiology, "how could Dennis be anything but inoffensive pap? Hasn't
it always been? Isn't that, in fact, the point?"

The above
strip is fairly typical of Dennis's
early years. In it, Dennis's mother seems to be advising the
babysitter to strike Dennis with a club until he is knocked unconscious.
It was originally published on November 30, 1951.
Like
others of his generation, Ketcham returned home from the Second World
War a changed man, eager to impose on family and society the order and
civility and wholesomeness that combat had robbed him of. But having
seen the horrors of war, Hank Ketcham had perspective. Any
mischief any
child could possibly get into would never approach the gruesome reality
of men murdering each other on the battlefield. He could make kids as
bad as he wanted and they would still never be really bad, on balance.
Thus, he was free to illustrate the anarchy of childhood; the unbridled
mayhem that was lacking from other children's features of the time.
Ketcham's early Dennis Mitchell is mean-spirited...

"I'm making a list of people to bite when my teeth grow back in."
...And adults (including his parents) seem to genuinely dislike him:

Today, you're more likely to find Dennis sitting in the corner
wisecracking than actually doing anything that would require punishment. He doesn't wear the scowl
he did fifty years ago; the sourest he ever gets is simply wry.
He's just another Family Circus kid, playfully mispronouncing words and stating the obvious at
inappropriate times. If the newspaper made a mistake and mixed up
the Dennis and Family Circus captions (which
they've done, more than once), I would never notice. In fact, for
all I know, they've been doing it for ten years.
In an interview,
Sunday Dennis artist Ron
Ferdinand said, "I work with 4 or 5 excellent writers, so I get to be
picky with the material. I can afford to use only the best scripts and
that's a luxury. The cast of DTM is so beautifully defined that they
virtually write themselves anyway."
Besides the obvious first question (if what we see in the paper are the
best scripts, what else must they be writing), I
think it's worth asking, do "beautifully defined characters" make for
good comics? Well, sure, at first blush; but if we already know what Dennis is going
to say in any given situation, do we really
need to see him do it? Do we need to retread tired material,
over and over? Do we need to maintain the status quo?
Yes, of course we do. The merchandising and licensing agreements
demand it. Even though it doesn't seem like the public is
clamoring for Dennis merchandise
-- it doesn't matter if nobody I
know gives two hoots about Dennis fanny-packs
-- somebody must be buying
it. I can deduce this logically, because otherwise there wouldn't
be a strip. Who would bother creating mediocre comics -- somebody else's mediocre comics,
remember -- if there was no money in it?
There exists a Catch-22: the comic's unique appeal attracted an
audience, and so licensing agreements were created to capitalize on
that audience. Now, in order to maintain the lucrative licensing
agreements, the comic must continue on, long after its appeal has
faded. Dennis Mitchell is a recognizable enough character that
companies will pay for him to endorse their products.
It doesn't matter that the comic has already said anything interesting
it was ever going to say; that it has contributed whatever it had to
contribute. Dennis the Menace is, today, a once-proud celebrity reduced to homelessness, sucking off
the residual goodwill of society while begging for money and doing
nothing in return but taking up space in the newspaper that could be
otherwise put to good use. Because do we really need 365 days a year of this?

Okay, first of all, does he know the word "infectious" or not? If
he knows the word, then he
doesn't need to sound it out like a retard. If he doesn't know the word, then why is
he asking to go to the doctor? That's Problem Number One.
Problem Number Two is, how is this
character remotely Dennis the Menace? His laugh is infectious? He's laughing in school? Where's the slingshot
in his back pocket? Why is his mom not protectively clutching the
crockery as her chaos-spawn ambles through the door, hell-bent on
destruction?
I cannot deny the influence that Dennis
has had on a generation of comic artists and fans.
But wherever there's money involved, people keep things alive.
zombie-like, stumbling through a world they never made. I'll bet
if Terry Schiavo had been crapping nickels every hour on the hour while
she lay in that hospital in Florida, there'd be no controversy and no
emergency legislation and no nothing
because she'd still be alive.
I am as much a doctor as Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist. And I
say, with all due respect to the Schiavo family and to the late Hank
Ketcham, let this nag die.
There will be no resuscitation. There will be no surgery.
And the only prescription from this
doctor will be an overdose of sleeping pills...
...That's what I truly believe. But that would sort of miss the
point of the column. So, let's work at odds with Mr. Ferdinand's
"the characters write themselves" philosophy and shake things up a bit,
really bringing Dennis back to his troublemaker roots, shall we?

...
Okay, maybe that's a bit much. He is, after all, only (and
always) "five an' a half." Despite the fact that keeping Dennis
lodged in the status quo is, in my opinion, the wrong way to go -- I
can see how this may be a bit too much
of a radical departure. Besides, Dennis is already the Dairy Queen
spokesman. He doesn't have to
come out of the closet.
I do recommend that Dennis
regain his malicious edge. Here's my serious suggestion:

Until next time ... I'll see you in the funny papers.
-- November, 2005
