Wondermark Calendar, New Holiday Cards, and Wrapping Paper!

This is it! The big list of things that are all VERY COOL and that you can order from me RIGHT NOW! This post will cover:

1. The 2017 Wondermark Calendar!
2. Downloadable & printable holiday cards!
3. Two brand-new Wondermark holiday cards!
4. Some experimental products — magnets and wrapping paper!

LET’S GET RIGHT TO IT.

The 2017 Wondermark Calendar

You can pre-order the calendar RIGHT NOW!

Since it’s the big Year Ten edition, I decided to do it on Kickstarter this year! Just to see if it could attract some additional attention. Also it meant I got to make a fun video!

As usual, you can get the whole package including calendar cards and wooden stand, or just the cards themselves if all you need is a refill.

But there’s a third option too! I designed a very elaborate and cool Year X Deluxe Collector’s Edition Stand.

it's really cool

That’s an optional upgrade if you like! I will be producing and hand-assembling them here at the ol’ workshop.

The theme of the calendar this year is the Absurd Sports League:

The Absurd Sports League was founded by mistake some decades ago, when the members of a minor league softball team arrived for their opening day away game at an altogether wrong address, and mistook the vendors of a debris-strewn flea market for the opposing team…

…I have tried with this calendar to present an accurate overview of the history and scope of Fleaball as it has been played since its inception. But as no two games are ever the same, no three players can wear the same uniform, and no four consecutive games may be played on odd-numbered dates unless all seven endfielders agree to rotate shoes every half-quintile, I can take no responsibility for any inaccuracies the calendar may contain.

More on the League, and on the enigma that is Fleaball, in the coming days.

Like last year, the calendar will come with a brand-new Wondermark Cast Card, and, if it’s your fifth calendar or more, you can also get a new Calendar Ace card!

2 new 2 be 4gotten

However, to save time and avoid waste for people who don’t care about them, I won’t be including Cast Cards with EVERY SINGLE package by default — in order to request one, all you have to do is add one penny to your pledge. It’s explained in exhaustive detail over on the Kickstarter page.

### A SIDEBAR TO NOTE: Patreon folks already got an early crack at special pricing for the calendar! And there’s still time to get on the Cast Card Patreon subscription train for November, which features the lovely Jeredith in her Halloween costume:

Love the skull bra, Jeredith.

Thank you to all Patreonauts who’ve already given us a jump-start in calendar orders!

### BACK TO SCENE

The calendar’s Kickstarter campaign is very short — only 10 days in all — because it has to end early enough for me to get everyone’s shipping information. This is the big downside to using an external service like Kickstarter. So if you’re interested, please, don’t delay!

Pre-order The Absurd Sports League All-Stars!


Downloadable holiday cards

We COLLABORATE to make these great cards!

I sell paper holiday cards, of course (more on that in a sec), but this year I’m also making my collection of holiday-themed Multi-Purpose Cards available as a PDF download!

This way, you can print out the cards at home with no shipping from me required. The download comes with both US letter paper and A4 sized versions.

(My universal set of general-occasion Multi-Purpose Cards are also available for download.)


Two new holiday cards

I’ve designed two new paper cards for this holiday season!

Snow wonder you have a headache!

ah, the ol' christmas bee

The first one is a snowman staying cool under pressure. The second one is a classic Wondermark Christmas comic.

These, and/or any of my dozens of other card designs, can be ordered right now at the Wondermark store!

This is the other reason I decided to break off the calendar into its own thing: so greeting card and other orders can ship quickly, without having to wait for the calendar to be completed.

(These two new cards are still at the printer, and will start shipping in a couple days — but all other designs are in stock and can ship immediately).

SPEAKING OF THE STORE…


Magnets & wrapping paper

I’ve got some new stuff for sale this season!

First: this is not technically wrapping paper, but I wound up with some posters printed on lightweight enough stock that they might work well for the purpose (or other purposes that big sheets of paper are good for, such as…placemats? Book jackets? Lampshades?).

that's NOT QUITE a wrap yet...

Since they’re posters, they come as individual 16×20″ sheets, but I give you a bunch of them to use (and one sheet is enough to wrap a smallish package).

This is more of a clearance thing than an actual let’s-make-wrapping-paper thing (I looked into getting actual rolls made once, and man, it’s expensive), but I thought you might find them useful!

that's a wrap!

Also, magnets!!

stick around

true statement

The full color “Atoms” magnet is a test product with limited quantities in stock. But the engraved wooden ones, we produce in-house here at the studio! I’ve been taking these to conventions all year and they’re really cool. You can get them individually, or mix & match to make a set.


For these items, and/or holiday cards, and/or stickers and other cool stuff, place an order today from the Wondermark store!

I ship the orders myself, and promise to, when I put your goods in a package, include a shake from that empty “Love” canister your aunt keeps on her spice rack.

store-y of my life

And there’s still a lot of great stuff over in my TopatoCo store, too!

this old stuff too!!!

I look forward to being the source of weird gifts your friends and/or loved ones will think you are very cool for having found.

SPACE TIME! variety show at San Diego Comic-Con

TIMESPACE

The San Diego Comic-Con is nearly upon us! I’ll be at the TopatoCo booth (#1232) provding Roll-a-Sketches, friendly handshakes, and answers to any questions you may have about life.

On Friday night, I’ll also be sharing some True Stuff From Old Books as part of a cool variety show called SPACE TIME!, hosted by musician Marian Call:

The incomparable variety show SPACE TIME! returns to SDCC this July. Tickets available now!

Songwriter Marian Call hosts her 6th annual showcase of science and art in San Diego. This year’s guests include:

  • Historical comic artist & man-about-the-internet David Malki ! of Wondermark!
  • Songwriter Seth Boyer, with new original songs about space and time!
  • Writers Kayla Cagan and Josh A. Cagan!
  • Author (and financial advisor to the internet) Nicole Dieker!
  • A discussion of life on Mars by emeritus Mars rover driver Scott Maxwell and Mars rover instrument technician Kim Maxwell!

Come ready to sing and learn and laugh with friends old and new.

$12 online tickets are available until 5PM PST on the evening of the event. If the show has not reached full capacity, the remaining tickets will be available at the door for $15. Seating for food and drinks begins at 6:30pm ($10 minimum per person). Learn more about the venue at 98BottlesSD.com.

No SDCC pass is required, and locals encouraged to attend! The event is in Little Italy, away from most traffic and parking woes associated with the con. Easy public transit available via light rail (use the Middletown or Little Italy stops) and by bus (take the 83, 280, or 290).

Get tickets in advance, in the past this show has sold out!


As you may know, you can order prints of any individual comic strip you like from my TopatoCo store.

I also bring selected favorite prints to conventions! They look like this:

sorry for suddenly mooning you

Every convention, people ask if I have specific ones, and while I often do, sometimes of course I don’t.

So I’m starting a new thing: if you’ll be at Comic-Con (or Gen Con, later this summer), and you want to get a print of a specific comic, email me in advance and I’ll make sure to bring it for you.

Just email dave at wondermark dot com, subject: “Comic print.” I’ll have it waiting at the booth for you to pick up! (They cost $7, and you can pay when you pick it up.)

SPEAKING of my TopatoCo store, I’ve got two new shirts in there! “Cooking is Wizardry” from this comic, previously only an apron, is now a shirt as well. And also, now you can enjoy “Turctopus”, hailing from this comic!

Behold, the feathery evidence of the presence of a wizard!!!

Wondermark & Machine of Death anniversary sales, PLUS: Earn the Library Ace cast card!

THREE BIG TOPICS IN THIS POST:

I. Wondermark book super sale!!
II. Machine of Death anniversary sale!!
III. How to claim the new “Library Ace” cast card, for free!

BOOK 'EM

This year (come April) will mark THIRTEEN YEARS of me posting Wondermark comics on this website. This website is nearly in EIGHTH GRADE. It will soon be learning ALGEBRA.

I don’t want to wait until April to celebrate, though — we just hit comic #1200, and that’s a nice round number.

So I’m doing a special book sale for THIRTEEN DAYS, where you can get any three of my books for eighteen dollars total! It’s the THREE-’TEEN sale. That’s a terrible name for a sale. It is no longer called that.

If you’ve been meaning to complete your book collection, now’s the best chance you’ll have for a while. If you haven’t picked up a Wondermark book before, what a great time to do so! I am very proud of all my books. You can read more about all the different titles here!

All eight of the books pictured above are included in the sale — four strip collections, two themed collections, a book of drawings, and a big thick novel. (The latter two are available digitally, as well.)

I hope you take this opportunity to fill a bookshelf, or a slab of giftwrap, with some cool books!

BUT! THAT’S NOT ALL…

what a KILLER deal

It’s ALSO the anniversary of Machine of Death!

The original Machine of Death comic appeared on Dinosaur Comics in December 2005.

And it was around this time of year in 2006 — a little while after the comic first ran — when Ryan, Matt, and I (along with some other folks on Ryan’s forum) first started talking about how cool it would be to put together a book of short stories.

That was ten years ago! Since then, we’ve put out two books and a card gameAnd you can grab any of them during this sale for JUST TEN BUCKS EACH.

The game normally retails for $35 (and the expansion set for $45), so this is a…killer deal. Get it? Because it’s called Machine of Death.

If you don’t know about Machine of Death yet, this video will summarize it for you in thirty seconds:

It’s pretty great stuff. (You can also get the MOD books digitally, if you prefer; or, here’s the entire first book in audio form as a free podcast.)

It would probably make more thematic sense to run this sale for ten days, but since the Wondermark sale is thirteen days long, we’ll call this one thirteen days as well.

You can even patronize both sales at the same time! They, and many other cool things, are all on offer together over in my TopatoCo shop.

OKAY NOW THERE’S ONE MORE THING

read all about it

Yesterday I introduced the Cast Card Subscription program, via Patreon, in which I will produce and send you a cool limited-edition plaque every single month.

In that post, I wrote “Moving forward, there will be other ways to get other Cast Cards, too” besides the subscription.

Like this, for example! Today, in addition to the Patreon subscription cards, I’m issuing a new “Library Ace” cast card, pictured above.

There are two ways you can get this card:

FIRST METHOD: If you own five or more Wondermark books, you are a Library Ace right now! You qualify to get one of these cards, for free, to commemorate your great achievement!

To claim your card, take a cool picture of your five (or more) Wondermark books. They can be any five from the picture above, or older ones that are now out of print. (I’m pretty sure I’ll recognize them.) I wanna see what you got, and show your collection to other people too!

Then: tweet your picture with #libraryace, and tag either @malki or @wondermarkfeed. (And make sure you’re following one or both of of those accounts, so I can DM you your claim instructions once I see your post!)

That’s it! Just take a picture of the books you already have, and share it with me. I’ll send you the cast card as a thank-you for being a cool person with good taste in books!

SECOND METHOD: If you don’t already have five Wondermark books, well, coincidentally we’re running a sale on books right now! I can’t remember if I’ve mentioned it recently.

If you happen to order books in this sale, and you end up with at least five books total — between the books you’re ordering, and any books you may already have at home — then congratulations, friend: you’re now a Library Ace!

You don’t have to wait until you get the books in the mail: feel free to forward me your TopatoCo order confirmation email (to dave at wondermark dot com) — and if you like, attach a picture to show any other books you’ve already got, so that everything adds up to at least five books overall.

When I get the email, I’ll share your picture on Twitter (if it’s super cool) and add you to the ACE STACK at once.

This promotion, like the others, will run for THIRTEEN DAYS! The sales, and the Library Ace claim period, will all end on MARCH 9. Beware the nines of March!!

…And of course, there are still a few days left to join the cast card subscription list in time to claim February’s Patreon-exclusive card. A few people have signed up so far, which is super great — I kinda like the idea that only those few people will get that month’s card, which makes that card super rare and thus extra cool for those folks!!

I love running sales like this when I can — I just want to get this stuff into your hands, and I know not everyone can afford to get all the things they might want right when they first come out. So I’m really happy to do discounts and promotions when I can, and I hope you take advantage of them! Hooray for books and cool books and enjoying books!!

Wondermark AND Machine of Death – Super Sales on TopatoCo

And don’t forget to tweet me your #libraryace picture!

i like making things that are shiny

‘Horrid Little Stories’ – Now on Kindle!

A couple years back, I published a small book called Horrid Little Stories: Sixty Dark and Tiny Tales of Misery and Woe.

It’s a 150-page collection of all the art and verses from the annual Wondermark calendars of 2008-2012 (and a few bonus verses besides!).

Stylistically, it’s a bit of an homage to Gorey, where the stories are all told in rhyme and everything always ends in tears.

The book has been available for some time in my own store (where it can be bundled with greeting cards), in my TopatoCo store (where it can be bundled with T-shirts), and on Amazon (where it can be bundled with a 27-lb tub of cat litter).

But that’s always been for a flimsy, paper edition!

Today I’m pleased to announce that this book is available for Kindle, as well:

horrible. just horrible.

Because it’s a heavily illustrated book, this is a bit of an experiment for me with Kindle’s page layout capabilities — I’ve never offered any sort of comic collection on Kindle, because it doesn’t seem like it’d be that easy to read. But this book, which is half illustrations and half text, works pretty well for e-reading!

If you are a Kindle Unlimited subscriber, you can even read it for free… Or, if you are just a normal person who likes Kindle books, it’s a mere few dollars. Cheaper than that 27-lb bucket of cat litter, and it stays in your life longer, too!

Hope you check it out!! I want to move more of my book catalog to the various ebook formats as time goes on, so I am interested to hear if you like this, and whether the format works well enough for this material.


Get your Valentine cards before the POSTAL INCREASE!

Boo, postal rates are going up again! Regular letter mail is unaffected—and there’s actually an improvement to parcel service: now first-class parcels can go up to 16 ounces, instead of 13! LONG OVERDUE, in my opinion!

BUT, unfortunately, package rates and international rates are going to go WAY up. The price increase takes effect on January 17, and I will have to bump up the shipping rates in the store a little.

SO, if you would like to buy some Wondermark valentine cards, and BE READY for mid-February for once in your life, this week is a really great time to do so!

booooooo

We’ve also got the whole complement of Multi-Purpose Cards in stock, and thanks to our Kickstarter campaign last fall, all sets of the Multi cards now ship in snazzy foil-stamped boxes at no extra charge:

yes they are really that shiny

These boxes contain no labels or branding and are yours to keep forever! You can put anything you like in them, even drugs (CO and WA only).

What great boxes, everyone! Enjoy those boxes. They are pretty super! And the cards are good, too, I am told.

AND HERE’S A SPECIAL DEAL FOR YOU: I like these boxes so much, that for this week only, I’ll include a gold foil box with any set of 10 cards! You can mix and match which 10 cards you like, and I’ll pack them in the lovely elephant box for you to enjoy for the rest of your life and your descendants’ lives.

[ All Manner of Wondermark Greeting Cards ]